Is there a bias in love?????

What do you think???

Do you hold a bias when considering your love for others?

Do you love one more than all the others, and if so why???

My bias:

My bias in love is with my sister. I have found out that I tend to have more love for my sister than anyone else in the world.(Even God)

Why????

Because my sister is much like myself. She is just like me in the sense that she came into this world in the same ways and from the same entity that I was born into. She is special to me because unlike everyone else in the world she has been through the same things I have been through. She cannot be replaced by any other because she is unique to my relations with my parents and with my life as a whole. She is the only person I can relate to in every sense of the word.

I have know all sorts of things in life but of in all the things I know in life nothing is like my sister. None other has been there for me as she has. She is my little sister and no one else has ever been so involved in my life more than her. It seems as if no matter what I do or say to her she is always the same. She never changes her opinions of me, and always stays as her self. She will always be my sister and she will always be the one I can relate to in life. The connection I have with her cannot be duplicated by any other.

I have more reasons for this bias than in the unique qualities. I also think she is the kindest and most charming person I have ever known. I don't know of anyone with a bigger heart than her's. She is so innocent and harmless. She has never shown me her dark side unlike everyone else. That leads me to believe that she is pure and free from unscrupulous thoughts and intentions. I love her so much.

In the past as a kid I was hard on her and I neglected the gifts that she offers. I even made her feel bad about herself because I wasn't like her. I made her feel ashamed of herself because she wasn't someone I could compare to. I used to treat her really bad just because she treated me so good. I was scared of her innocent intentions and willingness to relate to me. I feared her grace and beauty. I paid for that dearly. I suffer every time I think of my spite for her. That spite turned me into her slave. I will do anything for her and she has my heart in her hands. For that I give her all the love I know and all the love I have. For that she is the one I love more than any other.

How about you???

Do you feel the same way about someone you know???


Abraham

That is hard stuff.

Someone once educated me that "it is better to have loved one too many than one too few".

Nice to know about your sister. But I bet there are at least some readers for whom that would set off a trigger response in an undeveloped hypothalamus.

Congratulations you are a very fortunate man to have the Love of your sibling, may God be with you always.

TUT

Abraham,
The written word can convey different feelings in everyone who reads it. You write very well (can I use some of the wording )
I feel relationships are built on
trust.. that the other person will never hurt you. We all have our defenses ( the brick wall around our hearts) that through time comes down to maybe... a white picket fence?( if your luckly enough to find the right person). I am happy to hear that your family still counts for something. I know that if I need them, my family will be there for me. I have recently met someone (Gayle) who has changed my life so much for the positive that I can not put it into words.
I never thought I could Love again...Now I know that I did not even know what love was!!!!!!!

[Edited on 17-6-2003 by RealFlight]

Thanks for the comments everyone.

I thought that I wasn't clear enough. Hopefully everyone else will understand me just as well as you did. Love is great. I have loved many people but received no love in return. Many times that is my fault. Many times I ask myself what real love is. To this day I still feel as if I don't really know even though I feel that is just as contradicting as it may sound. I think there are many kinds of love and that is why I posted this topic. I wanted to dive into the mysteries of love. I think that many people feel the same way about love.

I think that love is unique and because of that love can be hard to understand. Love keeps us on our toes and keeps us privy to our feelings. Without the need for love we wouldn't really know what we want in life. Love is what drives us. Love is what makes us. To find love is to find ourselves. Each time we experience love we find a little bit more of ourselves, regardless if that love hurts or not.

I could talk about love until the cows come home so I will stop before I fall off topic here.


Anyone else have a bias in love???


Abraham

I think that the word "Love" is misleading. What's "Love" anyway?

I think that there's really only

A) Compassion

B) Attachment

C) Lust

When people hear the word "Love" or say that that feel it; they're usually confusing the three with each other.

When someone says that they feel "Love" for someone; they either feel one, or a combination of A, B or C; am I correct?


ONE

That is definately true. Some would have us believe that lust is a sin. I disagree with that assessment. I think lust CAN BE sinful but isn't always a sin. Attachment definately has something to do with love. Compassion is obvious. So what would you say about bias in relation to these matters???

Do you hold a bias in this matter???

Absolutely.

I know that I love my fiance' differently than I love my mother, or my brother, or my cats, and my dog, etc. Love is no different than anything else...it has degrees.

There's absolutely a bias in love but the bias can change at anytime.

Originally posted by Illmatic67
There's absolutely a bias in love but the bias can change at anytime.

I completely agree. Not because I think that way but because I have lived that way through experience. At first my greatest love was for my mother. Then when I realized how much I missed my father I started to love him a whole lot more. In fact I loved in that sense for many years. Only through hardships and other matters in my life did I learn that I loved my sister even more. There were brief periods where I loved a girl named Natalie even more, but that changed as soon as she changed. So Illmatic is right. That bias is bound to change over time.


Abraham

But I'm not sure that making a bias of love for someone of your family more than someone else is a so good thing...

I have two little sisters of 7 and 13 years old. I love them the same and make no favourite between on and another... I think that It wont be justice if I've done so.



[Edited on 18-6-2003 by Nans DESMICHELS]

a TRUE love is unbiased and unconditional.....

regards
seekerof