a reply to: mysterioustranger
I'm not involved in studies. I saw what I saw. And yes, I'm absolutely telling the truth. Since you believe in God, I feel comfortable with telling
you that the biggest thing that is holding me back is the fact that these experiences that I've had are likely demonic in origin and I feel that
there's something wrong about profiting from it. I didn't really realize that that was it until I stepped back from the thread for a while and tried
to figure out the real reason that I feel uneasy about this whole thing.
I guess that's where I disagree with you that I should be seeing this as an opportunity. Now, had I made this up, I'd be keen to sell it because that
just makes sense--why else would a person make up something unless they were just asking for attention? Honestly, I wish someone would step forward
and tell me that I'm not the one alone in this. So maybe it's not just to help others that I got somewhat involved, but to help myself come to terms
with what happened. I was invited to join the facebook group by the woman who found me and my story in the first place. I'm in no way involved with
field research or anything like that (I've gone back to the place where it happened many times, and it never fails to give me the creeps. I have no
desire to look any further than that lol. I don't want to see that thing EVER again). I do my own research on the internet, but I don't share what I
have found for the most part. What I have shared of that, I've shared it on ATS. I am a member of the facebook group because I want to see what other
people say, and if anybody talks about anything like what I've seen. I contribute by telling the members my opinion of what these things are, and I
posted the sketch just to see if anyone might recognize it (no dice, unfortunately) but I have never shared my story on the facebook group. I hope
that explains my relation to that, better.
I feel like, if anyone, I want to be the one to speak about my experiences on my own terms. I do not trust anybody to tell my story besides myself
because as I learned, important facts are omitted and the original point of the lesson becomes lost as a result.
I can't put a price or a value on something that happened to me through no fault of my own. I feel like that would be wrong. It would be like reaping
profit from evil, and I want no part in any of that. Nor do I want to steer people toward this kind of thing. I'm all for the truth--and that's why I
have been so candid on ATS. People are free to believe or disbelieve me, and I really don't care either way. I know what I saw and I remember it with
every fibre of my being.
I just feel like I want to be known because of things that I create or something positive that I do, not because of the unfortunate and terrifying
negative things that I have been made to bear witness to. If I could help it, I'd choose to have never had any of this happen to me. I can't do that,
of course. Nor can I forget. I know that God has a reason behind allowing me to go through this, so I'll be praying about it and seeing what happens.
I'm sure everything will end up working out exactly as it is supposed to.
Thank you very much for your advice and encouragement and well-wishes. God bless you, too.
edit on 13-5-2016 by rukia because: (no reason