a reply to: Slanter
There is a significant difference between personal growth, and sublimation of self. Knowing the difference between these, where the lines are, is
something which is best learned early. It is possible to come by that knowledge by tutelage, by having wise people around one, when one is young and
learning the world around one. However, all too often the lesson is put on hold, inappropriate or incompetent parenting can hold the process back.
However, once learned, the lesson is invaluable.
For example, your buddy, with the personal hygiene issues...I have long hair, and a long beard. I clean and brush both, once every two days in
winter, once a day in summer, more if it is very hot. I value my kit, my clothes and equipment and personal accessories. They look after me, and I
look after them. I buy functional clothing that wears hard, and lasts a long time, mostly from the army and navy surplus store, plus the odd bits and
bobs from alternative wear merchants.
When my stuff starts to break down, I fix it. When it stops fitting me properly, I recycle it into something else, or get it let out a little if
possible. I do not do this because I fear looking unpresentable. I do this so that my kit can keep looking after me.
I would never sublimate myself for any reason, I value being who I am. However, because I value the man I have become, I will ensure that I have what
I need to get through the day, that my boots are not cracked of sole, that my trousers are not falling apart around my legs, that my shirts are in
proper order. Failure to do so can lead to complications and unhealthy situations.