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Freud called female sexuality "the dark continent"; if that's true, male sexuality could qualify as the dark planet. But when it comes to sex, guys are simple, right? Not true. The bedroom is one of the great stages of male performance, and as such, what you see and hear is typically the role, not the reality. It's no wonder, in trying to please the actor, a woman loses sight of a guy's true identity. Here are 10 "unmasking" facts you may want to know:
1. We Respond to Praise
It's believed that men are so consumed by our libido that we have no self-consciousness surrounding sex. But men are no different from women when it comes to compliments as catalysts for sexual confidence. This praise can be delivered before reaching the bedroom (give us the once-over and tell us how buff we look), and after (give us the once-over and tell us how buff we look naked). Along those lines, men worry about the size of their guts (and other measurable organs), their hair (or lack thereof) and other attributes. Try to be extra affirming about those sensitivities.
2. We Fear Intimacy...
…but not for the reason you think! Studies have shown that boys are more affectionate, even more expressive, than girls until they reach school age. At that time, social repression begins—of words, thoughts, feelings—and our desire for human connection goes underground. So taboo is this desire for intimacy that its possibility can terrify men—not because it's smothering, but because we realize how desperate we are for it. What's a woman to do? First, understand that your guy's hasty retreat post-sex may be about his own shock at how much he craves a connection with you (and how much he's denied it in life). Then, retreat a little yourself. This gives him time to see that his boyhood habits are, in fact, perfectly manly.
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originally posted by: Rubicon3
a reply to: BO XIAN
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How the heck did it get this way to begin with? The questions, the wondering, the...gosh...men are men, women are women just ACCEPT us each for WHO we are. A Total pain in the butt. WHY does there ALWAYS have to be questions looking for silly arse answers? Are "answers" going to change anything? NO! Simply because...wait for it! OF HORMONES. You find a way AROUND those pesky little buggers and you'll have an answer. Well...as far as I can surmise at any rate.
I've had a LONG time to look at and question human interaction, and it's scarey. I gave birth to three of you people, and you still boggle my teeny tiny mind. I watch hours and hours of TV and wonder how the hell ya'll take the punches, the stompings, the horribly painful things you do and just...walk away. It's just gotta come with the territory of being "male". I absolutely love ya's, better than sliced bread even...but, come on, it has to be hormones...and yes, that covers a very wide range of things.