posted on May, 8 2016 @ 08:57 PM
a reply to: crappiekat
I know, I know. I really am terrible with emotions though. It's like. I want to help everyone with all their emotions, but I can't even handle my own.
At the beginning everything was fine with her and me, but I acted upon my emotions, my emotions fired up for no reason. See, the problem with me is I
need to know without any shred of doubt that I am loved, and loved above all. To in some way feel more important than others for the person who loves
me. Yet at times rightly or wrongly I felt less than or equivalent to a friend. Of course not all the time. But still. I was stupid for that. Won't
Wasn't as bad as the first break up. That just sent me out of it. Drank to forget, but couldn't have much to drink so it was never enough and then
hell. Oh well, that is long past. My mother(I assume real?) loves me. With her I just don't want to disappoint her, hence college which I don't have a
good feeling about.
A special spirit? We all have unique spirits. Some good, some bad. I'm not sure what is best for me. I mean. There are so many possibilities. Best in
terms of a future(education, career)? Or best in terms of my personal freedom?