10 yr marriage hit the dead bedroom syndrome 6 years ago...

See a doctor and have your testosterone level checked.

Likely right on the money.

Of course, if you are a chronic pain sufferer, could be that too.

My wife and I have the reversed issue (my libido is more than hers).

Our solution works pretty well. It's a bit expensive, and less frequent than I like, but I found she's always more in the mood when away from the worries of the household. Like, when we're on vacation, etc.

So, at least once or twice a month, we get a hotel room (and don't have to commute home, as we both work an hour away from the house), have a nice dinner out, and basically a "staycation" night. Allows us to reconnect romantically without worrying about the kids, animals, etc.

Bottom line though, is that the partner who DOESN'T have the libido, needs to realize that the other partner needs the intimacy, and it's well within your power to do something about it, even if not "in the mood".

Prior to our solution, I often felt rejected, unloved, etc. even though rationally, I knew it had more to do with her pain, fatigue, etc. (as she too is a chronic pain sufferer). Wasn't fair to either of us.

Hope this helps.