How to Effectively Share Your Sexual Wishes With Your Lover

a reply to: BO XIAN

Thanks.

No BS, it takes two to make it work. I know people always say that, but it's true. The reason behind a relationship working and continuing comes down to both people wanting it to. Not just accepting it but really deciding, "I want to be with that other person." Because once one of you start thinking different and even worse not telling the other, it's going to be some dark times ahead.

This is an exciting thread!

I have a habit of targeting shy girls and empowering them. watching the metamorphosis they go through in single night by putting them in the drivers seat and selflessly yielding to their needs makes it all worth it. They're often a new woman by morning.

As for getting the process started. Thats simple. I even use my hair as a prop. I have very long hair thats curly, soft and really nice. Think sorta like Tarzan(im sorta vain about it.)

when things are heating up I gently take her hand and have her wrap a handful of my hair firmly around her fist and push me down onto my knees. I look up at her longingly and the rest happens like magic.

A few hours later its a hot mess of give n take and by sunrise were both glowing and the girl lying next to me is somehow grown or shown a secret part of her shes been denying and stifling for half her life.

Thats my version of sex therapy.

a reply to: BO XIAN

Good article. Too often, couples don't want to talk about the issue, and it's really kind of silly. The topic is one that married couples should be comfortable discussing. It's something special, and should be talked about as needed, so both are content. Over 34 years in, and this is one area where we haven't ever had a problem. Mainly because we can talk about it. No comparisons, no complaints, just discussion of who likes what. Over time, a couple can learn what the other person likes, and things just get better.

Nice to see you back.

originally posted by: mOjOm
a reply to: BO XIAN

Thanks.

No BS, it takes two to make it work. I know people always say that, but it's true.

ABSOLUTELY INDEED!

The reason behind a relationship working and continuing comes down to both people wanting it to. Not just accepting it but really deciding, "I want to be with that other person." Because once one of you start thinking different and even worse not telling the other, it's going to be some dark times ahead.

I think you put that exceedingly well.

There was a classic co-dependent book by the title of:

LOVE IS A CHOICE.

That's absolutely true. The feelings come and go--particularly infatuation feelings, idolized fantasy related feelings etc. THEN the real work of LOVE--PREFERRING THE WELFARE OF THE BELOVED over one's own--that real work takes a lifetime to do well and faithfully. Thankfully, even the earthly rewards are worth it.

a reply to: LadyGreenEyes

ABSOLUTELY INDEED. Well put.

Good communication is so crucial to so many good things--including lastingly good and fulfilling sex.

Congrats on your successful 31 years! YEA!

It is good to be able to post again. Thx. Thx.

a reply to: BO XIAN

hehe...

I don't talk to my hand.

Oh weird, right when I wrote that the guy on the TV show I'm shame watching (Big Bang Theory) held up his hand and said "Talk to the hand" with the Vulcan deal.



Samsung Smart TV IS spying on me!

I think this is the 3rd time this has happened to me on ATS.

a reply to: BO XIAN

24 years, but thanks! We'll get to 31 eventually, lol, assuming God doesn't take us all home before then.

Communication is key for any part of a marriage. We aren't perfect there, mind you, just isn't an issue in that one area. Funny, too, since I can't imagine my mom discussing such things! I guess I take after my dad there.

Always nice seeing old faces around here!