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I never had a girlfriend ..

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posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:19 PM
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Hi all I never had a girlfriend and I am 24 years old what should I do about it. I also have no friends in real life




posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:22 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

You can only change yourself so I recommend concentrating on making yourself better. Immerse yourself in your passions and be yourself. People are attracted to passionate people that don't give a $%@^.

ETA: Don't try too hard. It isn't intuitive, but women don't want someone clingy.
edit on 2016/4/7 by Metallicus because: eta



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:23 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

got a job? nobody to network with there?



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:25 PM
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a reply to: Lysergic

need to step outside your comfort zone. engage in social activities. maybe volunteer good way to meet ppl.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:25 PM
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a reply to: Lysergic I never had a job before and I think I have anixity towards a lot of people.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:28 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

Hi Dude200181. Im Mysterioustranger. Welcome here! You now have over 300,000 friends you can talk to at ATS. You can get a lot of great advice and opinions here to help you.

Our lady-members will be especially helpful. They know whats goin on and can help better than me.

Welcome here and get of hold on me and other members by sending us a U2U private message. Anytime. We are all here for you....

Enclosed is a poem about friendship I never forgot:

"A friend is not a person...who is taken by a sham...a friend is one who knows our faults...and doesnt give a damn!"

Peace, MS
edit on 7-4-2016 by mysterioustranger because: splg



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:30 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

only way to get over that is to engage in more and more social interaction. will be hard for you at first.
I recommend getting a job then you can chat up girls and make some work friends. as someone who has moved more times than I can recall I'm great at making friends when I wish too



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:30 PM
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a reply to: dude200181
How do you live?



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:30 PM
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originally posted by: dude200181
a reply to: Lysergic I never had a job before and I think I have anixity towards a lot of people.



My daughter kicked her boyfriend to the curb when she was 17 for him not having a job. Any normal girl isn't gonna date an unemployed dude. Why would she date someone with no ambition and no ability to support himself? You need to look at it from the woman's perspective.

Look, if you don't have a job and have social anxiety then YOU are the problem. You need to get yourself together before anyone will want to be with you.

Concentrate on yourself, your passions, your strengths and minimizing your issues. You can't look outside yourself for someone to 'save you' you can only save yourself.

Women will be attracted to the strong, confident man you are not some unemployed boy living in your parents basement who is scared of his own shadow.

You need to take charge of your life and be something people want to be around. This goes for friends and women.
edit on 2016/4/7 by Metallicus because: sp



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:33 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

Ahhh, never having a job can be an issue in that you don't have extra money to go do 'fun stuff'.
It's good to work. It's good for the mind and making friends.
Money is nice. It can afford you the ability to get out and travel or go places and meet people.

The anxiety is an issue and you will have to work through that somehow. Do you have friends now who possibly know your 'type' of interests and could introduce you to someone?

I'm so glad that I am not dating in today's world...it's an entirely different world than when I was a youngster!

I agree with those that said just be yourself though.

Good luck!


Just saw an above post and wanted to add...

Most girls/women I know wouldn't mind going on a date 'dutch' or even paying sometimes...but, to have to support another capable adult would probably be a deal breaker...
I mean to say it would be hard for a couple who have been together for years to survive one just laying down and giving up and not contributing to the relationship..No, it doesn't always have to be a financial contribution but, you need to bring something to the table, so to speak...
edit on 7-4-2016 by TNMockingbird because: see above



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:35 PM
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If you have high anxiety and social phobias, there is treatment for that.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:36 PM
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I think that women must hate me anyway for them to reject me like in the past.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:37 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

I think everybody has been rejected at one time or another. It's a part of becoming grown.

eta: you haven't told us enough. Why did they say they didn't want to see you anymore? What goes wrong?


edit on 4/7/2016 by angeldoll because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:41 PM
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a reply to: angeldoll I don't no for sure why but that was years ago anyway.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:44 PM
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originally posted by: dude200181
I think that women must hate me anyway for them to reject me like in the past.


Women don't hate people for no reason. They can detect that you are going to be a problem because of your social awkwardness and anxiety. You give off body language they can pick up on.

Look, you can't blame others for your situation. You already know this and you are getting good feedback here. I am a no BS person so here it is...you need to work on YOU. Once you do that then other people will be attracted to you.

You can be an ugly dude and still get women to flock to you. You need confidence, humor, confidence, means of support and confidence to be attractive.

That is about it...it isn't rocket science. A woman wants to feel like she can count on your when crap goes South. Show some balls and you will get a woman. I promise.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:44 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

Head to Thailand - plenty of ladies to love you long time.

Just watch for the ladyboys though.




posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:48 PM
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Quit over-complicating everything.
It goes like this...

Whats your name? I am Bob.

What are your interests?

See who will talk. It's infectious.

Then it's just a numbers game...

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, yes! Ok

If you smile alot, they will come and nobody likes whining.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:48 PM
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originally posted by: Metallicus


Women don't hate people for no reason. They can detect that you are going to be a problem because of your social awkwardness and anxiety. You give off body language they can pick up on.
You can be an ugly dude and still get women to flock to you. You need confidence, humor, confidence, means of support and confidence to be attractive.


And along with confidence...a sexy mind!

Definitely THAT!!!!

Nothing, women I know agree, is sexier and more attractive than a witty and intelligent person...not just intelligent but unbelievably smart!




posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:48 PM
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a reply to: dude200181

Brother, getting a girlfriend has never been a problem for me, finding the "right" woman now that is shooting in the dark blind folded. Just get out typically you'll meet women in the things and passions you enjoy it's even better if you can share those together. Don't be afraid to be turned down, but don't be weird about it, usually a smile some witty humor and a drink will seal the interest, don't be hard on yourself. but hey, look on the bright side, sixteen more years and you'll have a movie dedicated to you.



posted on Apr, 7 2016 @ 10:49 PM
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Well I know one thing I will be alone forever no matter what




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