So, I bought a crown (for my head).

well crap...

now I want a deer skull mask or a wolf skull mask... damn it.

originally posted by: Quantum12
a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan
No No let me help. Furry spider

That is the crown. Mr furry I am a good crown doing my business. My crown fell with a frown now please get me a leaf to well wipe with. I really am a good spider!

I know there are mods here. This poster needs to be permabanned. No exceptions. I got super triggered. This is my nightmare! So glad I live in Western Washington. We have like one dick spider. Everything else is nice.



I think I've mentioned this before. Roll out the toilet paper a little, take a sharpie and draw a spider. Roll it back up. Wait for the girlfriend to go to the bathroom. When she screams, run.

My thing is snakes. I am terrified of snakes.

Again, Western Washington is awesome. I can deal with garter snakes. Barely. I've known too many dogs missing a leg and been on too many horses when you hear that rattle or see one scurry away from the trail. Freaking hate rattle snakes.

a reply to: Domo1

You need a shotgun that shoots flamethrowers for that.

a reply to: Domo1

We have like one dick spider.

Now that's a nightmare. I couldn't imagine spiders coming out of there. Shudders.

a reply to: Domo1

Hey now that is a good potty trained spider. She loves you! So watch you kind words. all she wants is a pet and rub. We know you like a glove.

a reply to: Skid Mark

Thanks for the back up!!!

a reply to: Quantum12
No problem. Anytime lol.

originally posted by: Skid Mark
a reply to: Domo1

We have like one dick spider.

Now that's a nightmare. I couldn't imagine spiders coming out of there. Shudders.

Oh. When I read 'one dick spider' I took it to mean 'only' one. The implication being that some spiders have more.

As if they're not macho and scary enough

a reply to: Quantum12

I live in West Texas. I actually have stories that I could tell about tarantulas on the toilet.

originally posted by: bigfatfurrytexan
a reply to: Quantum12

I live in West Texas. I actually have stories that I could tell about tarantulas on the toilet.

Can I tell your story about spiders. Here it is. Don't forget to read my reply near the bottom. A fury spider story

a reply to: Quantum12

You don't want to hear the stories about my younger sister, scorpions, and bathrooms (yes, stories....plural). Poor wretched soul has the worst luck.

My gf recently bought me a tiara.

She is always calling me "princess", and I told her that she can't call me that because I dont have a tiara.

A week later one shows up on the doorstep.

So guess who's a pretty princess now...

a reply to: bigfatfurrytexan

So...

Who here thinks I should show up to one of the local LARPing events with my crown, and claim that I am the king and that all these grown men with their foam swords should acknowledge my right to rule?

I might show up with some friends with real swords, armor, and whatnot. Then be like:

"What? I thought you guys got down...? This is live action role playing, right? What's with the foam swords? Okay guys, lets get out of here -- lets go chop down trees with our battle axes and put ourselves in the hospital!"

a reply to: MystikMushroom

Yes MystikMushroom, you have to show up!!!

LOL. I will show up too with another poem for you.

a reply to: realnewsrealfunny

How sweet! I want to put mine on and wear it to the grocery store!

a reply to: ladyinwaiting

LOL

With the Crown of its showers and rains,
with the Crown of its illuminating lightning,
and the hand of its clouds,
A Crown wrote a letter upon the garden,
in dark blue and green.
No Crown could conceive of such things.
And this is why the earth,
grown jealous of your Crown.
Now take your beautiful Crown,
don't frown and love your new Crown!

edit on 4 8 2016 by Quantum12 because: (no reason given)

a reply to: ladyinwaiting

Awww why the hell not?!

Seriously we get one trip in our bodies. Why spend our lives miserable when we can have a little fun.

Do you guys realize that studies have been done...50% of the words we use on a daily basis are negative. Only 30% are positive, and 20% are neutral.

We are way, WAY to negative...

a reply to: MystikMushroom

We are way, WAY to negative...

I'm absolutely grim some days, I'm beginning to think it's coming to be my natural disposition. But whimsy... ah. If I saw someone in the grocery store wearing a crown, I think I would be delighted! I'm sure I would.

Maybe I need to start trying to acquire my second-childhood, but not sure I know how anymore. : (

a reply to: MystikMushroom


So I've read in another thread Your Majesty has got the Crown.


Please provide the average ATS peasants with a picture to worship.