posted on Mar, 18 2016 @ 11:44 AM
a reply to: ForteanOrg
Selfishness is a means, ego is the end. But yes, there is a lot of interchange in the notion.
But on a more intrinsic level....love is a neurochemical response. Plain and simple. If you don't elicit and nurse those neurochemical actions, love
will not occur. So while ego may play a role in it, digging down a little deeper you find a mechanism from which ego is steered, if not partially
What you are describing is not love. Love grows over time (excepting the massive oxytocin release subsequent to childbirth that initiates parental
bonding), slowly through the repeated satisfaction of closing neural connections. The woman I love, this came about over 20 years. Had she been vile
and nasty every step of the way, we would have never developed the bond that has put us together so firmly.
But you can extract that to a large degree, as well. The person who learns to be an employee by slinging Big Mac's...they are learning the same type
of thing: reinforced behaviors derived from a reward feedback. If you service that customer, your reward is a paycheck. And if you do it with a
smile, your reward can be not having a miserable time making that paycheck. This is how we all learn the merits of serving others, and what helps
break that viscious cycle of ego stroking that teens seem to have.
You do for others because there is a reward. It could be money. It could be "feel good". Auggie, above, mentions how much he dislikes the notion of
forced charity. The reason: it doesn't allow for the closing of the service/reward feedback loop. He enjoys helping others, and wants to feel the
reward from knowing he did it. Taking the money removes that reward feedback.