My friends little girl being bullied at school

Move...

2nd.

When I was a kid and other kids tried to bully me I would just give them a silent, cold stare. This worked really well for me. There are different ways of standing up to a bully, though. Some kids fight. Some kids make funny sarcastic remarks. Some kids get a bunch of their friends to surround them. Each kid has to find a method that works for her. The important thing is to not show weakness or fear. That just encourages bullies. Because bullies exist throughout life, from childhood thru old age, you have to learn to deal with them. The current method of trying to stop kids from bullying doesn't seem to be working.

Sal

a reply to: coop039

originally posted by: SallieSunshine
When I was a kid and other kids tried to bully me I would just give them a silent, cold stare. This worked really well for me. There are different ways of standing up to a bully, though. Some kids fight. Some kids make funny sarcastic remarks. Some kids get a bunch of their friends to surround them. Each kid has to find a method that works for her. The important thing is to not show weakness or fear. That just encourages bullies. Because bullies exist throughout life, from childhood thru old age, you have to learn to deal with them. The current method of trying to stop kids from bullying doesn't seem to be working.

Sal

a reply to: coop039

The issue is though that regardless of if you 8 or 48 you either know how to deal with bullies or you do not.

I have seen fully grown adults crumble and cry when having to deal with bullies and yet have seen small children deal with them in a flash.

I would love to have a clearcut answer to this but sadly do not.

I was bullied for 2 years by the same guy, Just always effing with me. One day at the beginning of class i was sitting at my desk with my head down, just in one of those moods. When he came up behind me and slapped the back of neck HARD and said wake up.

I flipped out and picked up my desk and swung it at him knocking his ass down then I slammed the desk into him and broke his arm

I got suspended for 10 days and had to talk to the cops but wasnt charged with anything. That dude never messed with or even spoke to me again.

Moral of the story, wait tell one of them (the worst one) is not expecting it and smash her with your desk.

a reply to: nonspecific

That post sounds a little racist?

it should. but why shouldnt it or why cant it? Why must we be so into diversity that we can't say we want to move our families away from blacks that act like animals?

Why is it racist to suggest moving away from the problem rather than resorting to violence?

The black children in the OP learned that at home or on "the street" at school.
Does it make me a racist to have had my children grow up and go to school in a white community?
You want to promote diversity, enroll your white child in an inner city black school,

Hopefully blacks will learn to behave before we run out of room for white flight.

I don't think what I said was racist at all.

a reply to: nonspecific

Its not racist......its just the probable truth of the matter. Honestly, if you don't live in the US and have first hand knowledge of how things actually work here, you really have no place commenting on the situation, much less implying that someone's response is racist.

originally posted by: tinner07
a reply to: nonspecific

That post sounds a little racist?

it should. but why shouldnt it or why cant it? Why must we be so into diversity that we can't say we want to move our families away from blacks that act like animals?

Why is it racist to suggest moving away from the problem rather than resorting to violence?

The black children in the OP learned that at home or on "the street" at school.
Does it make me a racist to have had my children grow up and go to school in a white community?
You want to promote diversity, enroll your white child in an inner city black school,

Hopefully blacks will learn to behave before we run out of room for white flight.

I don't think what I said was racist at all.

We should agree to disagree and move on here fella.


Children are small humans that is all.


You're a racist and that is your right and I wish you well.

Good day sir and good luck with that ideal.

originally posted by: Metallicus
a reply to: coop039

File a discrimination suit against the school and the district. They will settle it so fast it will make your head spin.

This seems to be the most realistic option rather than forcing a 9 year old girl to fight a group of bullies.

This ain't no film guys.

originally posted by: TonyS
a reply to: nonspecific

Its not racist......its just the probable truth of the matter. Honestly, if you don't live in the US and have first hand knowledge of how things actually work here, you really have no place commenting on the situation, much less implying that someone's response is racist.

How is it relevant?

The very fact that you mention where I come from suggests otherwise?

a reply to: nonspecific

Bloody hell man. That's highly respectable. Great work.

Good on ya.

a reply to: nonspecific

How is what relevant? The fact that you stated you're in the UK and not in the US? Its relevant because if you haven't lived the US experience in these "School Districts" means you can't possibly even begin to understand how things actually work here.

Let me put it this way. One day, I was riding the cross-town bus to work and two teachers, both Black females, were talking loudly and in excited manner about the conduct of a "new" teacher in the public school in which they worked, a Big City Independent School district which is 70% Black, 25% Hispanic and the remainder "white" and Asian. They were heard to comment that the school district shouldn't even hire "white" teachers, and for a number of reasons, but most of all because they believed the "white" teachers were racists. That made it pretty obvious that they didn't want white teachers in "their" schools and they certainly don't care to have "white" students in "their" schools.

The environment here in the US and particularly in the big cities is unlike anything people in the UK or Australia can possibly relate to. And, I don't blame you for that, but really, its a bit much when you presume to declare a statement racist when in fact, its just a statement that describes the actual situation on the ground as it exists!

originally posted by: TonyS
a reply to: nonspecific

How is what relevant? The fact that you stated you're in the UK and not in the US? Its relevant because if you haven't lived the US experience in these "School Districts" means you can't possibly even begin to understand how things actually work here.

Let me put it this way. One day, I was riding the cross-town bus to work and two teachers, both Black females, were talking loudly and in excited manner about the conduct of a "new" teacher in the public school in which they worked, a Big City Independent School district which is 70% Black, 25% Hispanic and the remainder "white" and Asian. They were heard to comment that the school district shouldn't even hire "white" teachers, and for a number of reasons, but most of all because they believed the "white" teachers were racists. That made it pretty obvious that they didn't want white teachers in "their" schools and they certainly don't care to have "white" students in "their" schools.

The environment here in the US and particularly in the big cities is unlike anything people in the UK or Australia can possibly relate to. And, I don't blame you for that, but really, its a bit much when you presume to declare a statement racist when in fact, its just a statement that describes the actual situation on the ground as it exists!

This was I thought about bullying.

If you wish to make it about your own devise thoughts then fine.

Crack on with that.

Good day.

Thats horrific! I went to school in 70's when children didnt wear uniform and it really stood out the people with money and the poor children. There was a boy who had holes in shoes etc and his life was a living hell. Every break and dinner he would be tripped up, pushed etc. I had a big group of friends and we took him under our wings. We told him to sit with us at break. As we were girls I dont think he wanted to sit directly with us so he used to sit close by. As there were a few of us and we were quite vocal and some were pretty and popular with the boys they didnt used to approach him when we were close by but I often used to think about him. Then just last year I saw him and he still looked a nervous wreck and a loner even though he must now be 50. It obviously affected his whole life and makes me so sad.

Children can be very cruel and seem to always find another child's weak spot. My child's friend is black and my son told me some of the children call him chocolate milkshake. My son thought it was harmless fun but then I said to him but think how you feel when children call you Malla POO instead of Mallalieu (have to say found this amusing as an adult but wouldnt have as a child!)! I always pull my son up with stuff such as this because children need to be taught empathy. These days though so many parents dont seem to bother unless it is something that is hurting their child. I think that is part of the problem.a reply to: nonspecific

My dad would take me to the streets where the bullies lived on weekends and make me fight them while he watched but that was a much different time.

I honestly don't know what the answer would be these days, everybody's quick to sue, police and social services get in the mix and the consequences for standing up for yourself can be incredibly serious especially if you live in a violent area with a lot of gangs.

Tough situation to be in and I feel for any parent that has to go through it.

originally posted by: MagnaCarta2015
My dad would take me to the streets where the bullies lived on weekends and make me fight them while he watched but that was a much different time.

I honestly don't know what the answer would be these days, everybody's quick to sue, police and social services get in the mix and the consequences for standing up for yourself can be incredibly serious especially if you live in a violent area with a lot of gangs.

Tough situation to be in and I feel for any parent that has to go through it.

Omg I remember that. The dads would ref while we beat the tar out of each other.

a reply to: coop039

document everything, then teach the 9 year old how to punch , tell the 9 year old if your ever physically attacked defend yourself, if the 9 year old gets convicted for a hate crime or something at least everything is documented as to show she was being confronted negativity by the other kid. Otherwise tell the 9 year old to walk away from the kid pay them no attention.

a reply to: coop039

Best suggestion - set up a way to record these incidents, then take it to the authorities AND the local press. Parents should get a lawyer and file suit for hate crimes being condoned/allowed by the school. If this was reversed, ther would be tons of organizations throwing fits in the media, and this kid is told to grow a thicker skin?

Proof is needed, to blow the lid off this injustice.

a reply to: nonspecific

On the issue of whether or not someone was "racist"; no. Just NO.

Yes, it matters where you live, because you don't experience there what people do here, and vice versa. Here in the US, there is, and has been for some time now, a real problem with race in the schools. I saw this as a kid. We were bused to mostly black schools, and oh, yes, there was bullying, and yes, it was based on race. No one as supposed to talk about it, but it ended up, before we moved out of state (not related to that) with FIVE white students in the entire sixth grade, and teachers discussing how the heck to handle it. All in one class, and still outnumbered, and yes, I mean that like it sounds. Daily threats of violence. Daily hassles just going to the restroom, standing in line, whatever.

These days, it is much worse. Anyone complaining of racism from blacks is labeled racist themselves, even though some blacks are clearly racists. Some don't want to attend schools with whites, have white teachers, or employers (or employees), and so forth. Black-on-white crime is called "just crime", while the reverse is called a hate crime. It's a complete mess. This affects the schools, and this poor little girl is a victim of the whole thing. The reason th school isn't acting, an what's supposed to be the anti-bullying age, is because she's white and they are black. Stating that as a reason, and stating that moving away from it is a good idea, isn't racist; it's common sense. The reality here is, in some places, the racists are not white.

I get that no one is supposed to think that's possible, and people are taught that minorities can't be racist, but that's simply not true.

I don't know how it is in Great Britain, regarding racial issues, but it's far from settled here. Worse the last 7 years or so than ever in my life, I might add. When kids are taught that whites are evil, and that violence is acceptable, it's going to affect how they behave in school. It's a cultural issue, that happens to fall along racial lines a lot of the time.

I like to think anyone can learn to deal with bullies if someone teaches her to use a method that works for her!

Sal

a reply to: nonspecific


The issue is though that regardless of if you 8 or 48 you either know how to deal with bullies or you do not.

Oh don't believe that doesn't happen here in the UK because it does. There seems to be an assumption that to be racist it has to be white against blacks, when there are just as many black people who are also racist to white people, it just isnt spoken about. Part of the reason hundreds of white girls in Rotherham were sexually abused for years by Asians wax because they were seen as white trash and the reason why the authorities allowed it to go on was because they were afraid of being seen as racist against the Asian Community. That doesnt sound believable or true but sadly it is. In fact it was realised last year although we have definitions of hate crime it doesnt seem to be acknowledged in instances like Rotherham that these were hate crimes against predominantly white girls.

This is a Guardian article from 10 years ago which discusses how half of murders which are racially motivated are against white people. I have chosen this article because any other articles of which there are many would be down played as right wing and thus irrelevant whether findings are true or not.

Remember this was 10 years ago and things have moved on substantially since then. Rotherham has only come to light since tgen and there are many such cases where Asian gangs have preyed on predominantly white girls as they are seen as legitimate targetswww.theguardian.com...! reply to: LadyGreenEyes