I just had a group argument which has prompted me to write this, as I wasn't getting anywhere in that heated discussion
The argument was based around half of us saying that sex and love are two separate things. The other half being strongly opposed to that, with strong
reasons of their own.
As far as Im concerned Sex and Love are two separate things
Im not saying that sex cant be or isn't better when love is involved. Im also not saying that love has to be involved for sex to be good either.
For me (and a lot of people) I understand that sex is (or perhaps was) primarily for reproduction, to carry on the human race, and to survive. Sex
feels good for the purpose of making us want to do it. Its a bi-product of evolution.
Sex was around a LONG time before love was.
I would assume that love came about perhaps because we evolved to a certain point emotionally, and perhaps we survived best in a family unit. Also the
idea was certainly pushed once religion became a big part of human life.
There are many times in history where its shown that Marriage was often treated more like a business deal. Often love was no involved at all. Not that
I agree with this for myself, but these kinds of things definitely still go on today.
I think that love and sex of course go together well. But they are not mutually exclusive. I think it would be ridiculous to suggest that every single
person who has ever had sex, has always 100% loved the person they are doing it with.
I also dont think that this should take away from feeling intimate with someone, I dont think it makes love any less meaningful.
The main argument that we received from the other side was that if we treat sex in such a way, then we are saying that its ok to cheat, because sex is
just a primal thing.
One of the girls tried to suggest that her morals were higher than mine, and that in fact people like me who feel this way are the reason that 'the
world is going to hell
This seems like very flawed logic. It seems like very 'black and white' thinking (which is my least favourite type of thinking :p )
Yes perhaps some people might use this kind of thinking. Sex is just Sex, and perhaps they will sleep with whoever they want all the time. But if you
are in a relationship and have agreed to be Monogamous then obviously if you love the person you would respect that. Its a personal thing in your own
relationship. I also dont see how talking about cheating was even relevant to the conversation, which was mainly about the origins of sex, and how
love is different from sex.
To say your morals are higher than someone elses, or better, is very subjective. ( There is a lot more I could say about morals, and what they are
based on but that seems like a separate topic)
I also don't believe that people seeing sex for what it is, is the sole reason there is some kind of collapse in humanity.
Id be much more likely to blame greed, corruption, money, lack of education and religion for the state of affairs. I do not think people having casual
sex really contributes much to this.
And before you judge me on my opinions, or make assumptions. Im not a huge slut. I don't sleep with lots of people. Yes I enjoy sex but that doesn't
mean i just do it with every tom dick and harry.
I am actually pretty conservative when it comes to my ideas on family. I do think its good to choose wisely who you have children with. I think that a
family environment with two parents is also wise, though I know this doesn't always work out.
But this doesn't stop me from realising why we have sex, and why we feel love, and how the two are separate, and can go hand in hand.
If you want to only have sex with someone you love, then by all means.. do that. And if you want to have sex with lots of people then do that (Perhaps
be responsible and use protection though)
edit on 1-3-2016 by IvyNeptune because: because grammar