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Augustus...You Should Be Dancing!!

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posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:00 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: jacygirl
Right?

*passes Raxoxane the popcorn* I'm just watching now, lol.

jacy


Did you know DB nailed his first cousin when he was 16?



And his last one an hour ago....


I've stopped using nails.

Plastic wire wraps and Velcro is washable and cheaper to re-use.




posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:04 PM
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a reply to: jacygirl

Jacy, did I ever tell you the story about when DB found that guy on the side of the road? Poor guy was tied to a post when DB pulled up. He asked what happened and the guy said, 'These fellas came, robbed me, beat me, stripped me naked and tied me to this post!'

DB looked around, unzipped his jeans and said, 'Looks like this ain't your lucky day.'





edit on 26-2-2016 by AugustusMasonicus because: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:05 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: jacygirl

Jacy, weredid I ever tell you the story about when DB found that guy on the side of the road? Poor guy was tied to a post when DB pulled up. He asked what happened and the guy said, 'These fella came, robbed me, beat me, stripped me naked and tied me to this post!'

DB looked around, unzipped his jeans and said, 'Looks like this ain't your lucky day.'



I thought you said we weren't going to talk about the day we met!




posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:08 PM
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a reply to: DBCowboy

I thought you two seemed to have a special bond.


Def better than Frasier, Raxoxane!



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:13 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I'm not getting half-baked pseudo-rat-pack "italian stallions" laid! That's tooooo much to ask for. I'm all for partying hardy and such...but if you're not even kissed the pope's ring, I have to say: "That's not good enough."



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:16 PM
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This is going down in ATS history. That last one up there has got me beaming



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:17 PM
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originally posted by: Willingly
a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I'm not getting half-baked pseudo-rat-pack "italian stallions" laid! That's tooooo much to ask for. I'm all for partying hardy and such...but if you're not even kissed the pope's ring, I have to say: "That's not good enough."



I remember one drunken night with Augustus.

He said, "That wasn't the Pope".

I said, "That wasn't his ring!"



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:20 PM
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a reply to: and14263



"I don't know how to spell pedophile..."

Is what kids typically say to DB when he asks them to write the ransom notes.



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:28 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: and14263



"I don't know how to spell pedophile..."

Is what kids typically say to DB when he asks them to write the ransom notes.


2 Words.

Free

Crayons



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:31 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus




"I don't know how to spell pedophile..." Is what kids typically say to DB when he asks them to write the ransom notes.


Why do you think I refer to the cathlic pope? I refer to Louis C.K.!!!

Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:31 PM
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Augustus once told me the magic words to say to a lady.

"It puts the lotion on it's skin. . . . . . . "



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:36 PM
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a reply to: DBCowboy



Augustus once told me the magic words to say to a lady. "It puts the lotion on it's skin. . . . . . . "



Mason-puppy's don't like that! Too greasy!



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:38 PM
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a reply to: jacygirl

Jacy, did I ever tell you that DB likes his women the same was as his Scotch? 15 years old and mixed up with coke.



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:45 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: intergalactic fire
but i do wonder what secret symbolism is graved into his belt.


I have an idea. Why don't you get reaaaally close and examine it. I am sure the answer will pop right out at you.


Are any tools required?



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:46 PM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: jacygirl

Jacy, did I ever tell you that DB likes his women the same was as his Scotch? 15 years old and mixed up with coke.



I'm laughing my ass off on that one!



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:47 PM
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a reply to: intergalactic fire

Salad tongs.


Large ones.



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:47 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus




Jacy, did I ever tell you that DB likes his women the same was as his Scotch? 15 years old and mixed up with coke.


AugustusMasonicus is soooo funny. He even points to pedophelia for no good reasons on this own party, just because someone mentioned the pope. I wonder how comes.

Louis CK learns about the Catholic Church:

www.youtube.com...



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:49 PM
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Augustus's wife once walked in on him and said that she heard that he was accused of pedophilia.

He replied, "Where did a 12 year old learn such a big word!"



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:51 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

I can understand tongues are required but why the salad?



posted on Feb, 26 2016 @ 03:55 PM
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a reply to: DBCowboy




Augustus's wife once walked in on him and said that she heard that he was accused of pedophilia. He replied, "Where did a 12 year old learn such a big word!"


And she replied, "the priest, who is driving the ice-cream-van, told me about it."
edit on 26-2-2016 by Willingly because: in vino veritas

edit on 26-2-2016 by Willingly because: spliff est omen and needs no nomen

edit on 26-2-2016 by Willingly because: drumming like a boss is not everybodys buisnes...



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