It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.


Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.


Help ATS via PayPal:
learn more


page: 1

log in


posted on Jan, 22 2016 @ 11:23 AM
I stepped amidst the trees, and the wind whispered through the leaves.
I could not see them, 'nor the night sky above.
It was dark, so very dark.
An inky void surrounded me.

The soft grass gave way to my feet, and the gentle breeze combed through my hair.
It was so peaceful.
So calm, so serene.

I wandered forward, ever on and on.
Not thinking, not stopping.
The forest stretched onwards forever.
The darkness stretched onwards forever.
Forever onwards I walked.

The first time I found the clearing, it was empty.
Silver rays of heaven descended from the sky to kiss the earth.
The space was inviting, yet I did not enter.
I did not cross from shadow in to light.
Something had stayed my steps.

I left.

Aeons passed, and I had found the clearing another time.
A small plant had pierced the ground in the center, its leaves barely beginning to grow.
I wanted to touch it, but that something held me back once more.

I left again.

The third time, it had grown.

The fourth time, larger still.

The fifth time, a bud had sprouted.
Again I had the urge to touch. Again I did not leave the cover of the forest.

I left once more.

The sixth time, something was different as I approached.
The silver light that was once tranquil now flared so bright.
Its radiance bled among the trees, and I could see the shadows of leaves.
They were... Grey...?

In the center stood the plant, now fully grown.
Its single flower a blinding...


My heart felt as if it was about to stop stop.
Electricity surged through my veins like wildfire.
A throbbing agony drummed inside my head.
I felt like I had been submerged underwater an unthinkably long time.
But I had broken the surface.
Sensation returned to my limbs.

The grass that was once soft began to itch.
The wind that was once gentle began to chill.
My eyes regained their focus, and what was once peaceful void...
Became a sea of endless grey trees.
My mind that was before so calm, was filled with confusion.

... Here?
Where was here...?
Something seemed wrong.
Why was here... A place... At all...?

My memories were jumbled, I couldn't recall.
What couldn't I recall?
They came to me, then faded.
I reached out a hand to grasp them, and...
They slipped my fingers like sand.

Where I was going.
Where I had come from.
What I had been.
All that remained was a single word upon my lips.


I spoke it quietly into the empty air.
Something prickled my eyes.
A thousand needles made their way in to my soul.

It was a simple word, a common word, so why...
Why did it make me so sad..?
Why did I feel so hollow!?

These thoughts consumed my attention, and I had unwittingly stepped into the clearing.
I had unknowingly reached out to touch the scarlet rose.
So what would be the price?

I froze in place.
A piercing presence watched from above.
My neck snapped back, and I gazed to the sky.
There it was, so brilliant and majestic.
It's luminescent shape framed against the eery, empty nothingess.
My skin began to crawl.

The sight of it tore at me from inside.
My head, my flesh, my bones.
I could think of nothing else.

So I ran. Or did I walk? Or did I crawl?

I fled for a year.
Or a day?
Or a second?
Or an instant?
Or eternity?
I lost track of time.
If felt time lost track of me.

Slowly, my limbs grew weak.
Slowly, each step became shorter then the last.
I found myself knelt over a pool.
I did not know how I came to be.
I did not know when I had arrived.
All that mattered was that I was here.

Gazing into its unfathomable murky depths, that word rose to my mind again, unbidden.
Hot tears spilled down my cheeks, into the water below.
Cracking its mirrored surface.

As the ripples calmed, I saw a reflection. (Stopped, halted.)
It should have been myself, but it was not. (It was another.)
Why was it not myself...? (But why not I?)
Was I not even worth an echo? (Was I without value?)

A girl I had never seen. (A boy I had never seen.)
A face I had never known. (A face I had never known.)
But it seemed so familiar. (It seemed so familiar.)
For some reason my heart seemed to ache. (Why does it hurt... My chest?)

Her eyes were violet. (His eyes were red)
Her hair was silver. (His hair was black.)
She was beautiful. (He was pretty.)
Like a princess. (Like a prince.)

Who are you? She seemed to ask of me. (Who are you?.)
Who am I? I wondered. (Who am I?)
Are you, I? I questioned. (Am I, you?)

I gazed into her eyes. (He gazed into my eyes.)
She stared back into mine. (I looked back, in turn.)
I could not help but wonder... (The question plagued me...)
If all that I was, was reflected in her eyes. (If I am all he sees...)
Would my being be reduced to her sight? (Is that all that I am?)
Suddenly, it all seemed so much smaller. (The world grew tiny.)

Small, so small. (Infinitesimally, until only we remained.)
Just you, and I. (You, and I.)
Us? (We.)

Moved by an invisible string, I brought my hand to the surface. (I brought my hand to his.)
For an instant, our worlds connected. (Interwove, collide.)

Our fingers met... (His touch brushed mine...)
And the mirror broke.
edit on 22/1/2016 by Eilasvaleleyn because: Split Into "Writing" and "Non-Writing"

posted on Jan, 22 2016 @ 11:24 AM

This (relatively) small piece of writing could be considered a sequel/continuation of this. I'd recommend reading it, as it's quite short, and in my mind probably a bit better, too.

While I enjoyed creating this, I feel like the first piece had a lot more impact, since it was shorter and I didn't feel like I was repeating myself. More lean, that is. The last part was very fun to write, though.

If I end up writing a continuation to this, I'll probably modify this piece slightly as well. (There are parts I'm not too happy with, but can't currently figure out how to improve. I might end up writing (bracketed) lines for the entire thing, rather than just at the water's edge. Might be interesting.)

"Tsuki" is Japanese for "Moon."

posted on Jan, 22 2016 @ 12:26 PM
I love the imagery and your writing is beautiful, but I don't quite understand its meaning.

posted on Jan, 22 2016 @ 02:17 PM
a reply to: Night Star

The meaning is whatever you make of it. It's as much your story as it is mine.

For me... I guess you could say it's a sort of purgatory. Wandering endlessly, outside of time. Maybe this place is the "deserted hell" my character's lullaby was for.

Hmm, if I had to attribute symbolism to things...

The forest is their resignation.
The flower is their past.
The moon is their emptiness.
The girl is their reflection. However, she's an individual character, so it's a bit more complicated than that.
I wonder... Whose perspective is this from? The girl's, or the boy's? You'd tend to think the boys, since the lines attributed to him are the ones not in brackets. However... Couldn't this story belong to either?

Or do you mean the plot? I guess there's a bit of a plot, but most of it is sadly still inside my head. It might remain that way forever.

posted on Jan, 24 2016 @ 12:18 AM
a reply to: Eilasvaleleyn

That's interesting. It is also interesting how with poetry or creative verse, the writing can have different interpretations depending on who is reading it and what they make of it. Keep up the good work!

new topics


log in