We all have a battle that no one else knows about.

I have had my fair share of overall experiences, from Spiritual encounters pissing off some very dark entities with my consistent annoying telepathic repetitive Tourette’s alongside getting on the nerves of interdimensional beings to astral projection, lucid dreaming, close encounters of the third and fourth kind, and getting stuck a few years ago in a relationship with someone who was rotten at the core, they were an imposter, a consistent liar, and mentally fckd up to the point where they would wake me up at 3 in the morning only to give me 15 – 20 lashes with a ridding crop and one time stabbed me in the stomach with a medical scalpel then poured a bottle of straight dettol on my wound and told me it was for my own good of becoming a stronger character.
Before this I use to have anger issues from my child hood where I was always mistreated at school by other students because I never seem to fit in. It was not until I was in my early 20s I found out I had Aspergers.
I for one in the pass have been emotionally hurt many times. At one stage for a couple of years I became emotionally dead and based all my decisions on pure logic. It was around this time I became a free mason, and climbed the ranks to a very high level, whilst this I was also a member of scientology as well as in a very strange state of my life, and lastly I was a member or the Rosicrucian society for a little while. Every night I would have lucid dreams of bunkers, caves, secret places here on earth were many things take place. Sometimes I would awake only to find that Im still in a dream, then awake from that dream to be in another lucid dream.
My Current status Is I am full time unemployed and have been a couple of years. I want to work but can’t get even a interview. And I push out at least 6 resumes a week to employers. I wish I could find a job that is NOT mundane and at the end of the day serves a greater purpose for the whole of humanity. Seriously why are we selling retail goods we don’t need or providing customer service of some kind to some client who could not give two ****s about you or scrubbing sht out of a toilet for a living for 30 years only for your employer to discard you after 30 years cause you walk around with a sad and life pathetic face.
Trying to find a job that is not mundane and has a greater purpose is not exactly something you see in your Sunday paper or (Job Seek)
I am currently trying to raise a family and it’s a little hard when you are stuck on unemployment benefits and no employer willing to give you a chance.
On a side note I just finished a diploma is 3d Computer game development.

To be Honest, I am way past breaking point. But I am managing to keep the lid on and stay very calm apart from the nervous twitches and headaches from the stress and anger.
Sure some of you could say I should go talk to someone, but at the end of the day no amount of talking about it will fix it as the problem is still there.
And to top it off I have just discovered I suffer from a Cognitive Processing Issue where some of the information that gets processed in my brain gets lost or misplaced, so I apologies if somethings don’t make sense, I am currently taking 8 grams of Bacopa Monnieri a day to assist with Neural Pathway development and 3 grams of Rhodiola Rosea to assist with mental fog, this helps a little bit but it more so has made the issue more vivid and real. So with that being said, I now know the problem is there and am exploring binary beat therapy to try to fix it.
Also I have recently started taking 45 grams of zinc a day to try to boost my brain up. This is achieved by increasing testosterone, via doing this you increase your bodies’ vibration to a higher level which in turn makes you more prone to paranormal phenomena, However the main reason I am doing this is I am trying to boost my cognitive function and motivation through the roof, A little bit like the limitless drug. Why do I do this, because I know I so much potential but it’s dormant in me as it is in 95% of the population.

Well you would be the first Freemason,Scientologist ( how did you leave the church btw) ,Rosicrucian ,who is unemployed. These people have a tendency to look out for their own. Might want to call in some favors....

That's a lot of zinc dude, you might want to cut back on it a bit.

I hope things work out with the job, keep at it.

a reply to: Svaba

Sure some of you could say I should go talk to someone, but at the end of the day no amount of talking about it will fix it as the problem is still there.

Whats the problem, again?

a reply to: Svaba

All the amount of talking will help

How in the world did you end up in those situations &

You are doing what you are meant to

You know it all happened so you become the person you are today and why and what's the purpose

You chose this

Am I crazies ?! Only you will know

a reply to: Svaba

Frankly, you lost me at scalple. Because we all leave them on the nightstand, right?

Please be well.

a reply to: Svaba

Scalpel that's when I stopped reading.

a reply to: Aeshma

if this story is true .. my first thought was I hope the person is in jail right now