The Downsides of Being Beautiful

a reply to: rukia

Don't hate me because I have a symmetrical face.

The OP is on to something. I am not kidding. And this is not a great pic. My lips are fuller, as if they were drawn on. My cheekbones slightly higher. My eyebrows aren't dark, that is a cheap cam pic. I thank the German on 2 sides of my family.

a reply to: boymonkey74

I'm in the same boat, fighting them off with a pointy stick all the time becomes depressing. Just driving to work is like a scene out of World War Z as women fling themselves onto the bonnet of my car to try and get at this...

Woe is me..

This thread is going to get very interesting

Beauty to me has very little to do w ones physical appearance. That's over stated I know. But I feel is a universal truth

a reply to: TechniXcality

truth is the way we approach the world generally dictates the reactions we get

Is starting a thread titled "The downsides of being beautiful" coming more from a victim or a victor?

As you said, it's all in the approach.

originally posted by: ManBehindTheMask
This thread is going to get very interesting

Beauty to me has very little to do w ones physical appearance. That's over stated I know. But I feel is a universal truth

He said like 4 times he;s not talking about beauty, exactly.

Interesting comments. As I have gotten older, feeling ancient these days, physical beauty is not something I spend much time thinking about. I know I was much more aware of beauty when I was younger, accepting dates of men I only thought were cute or handsome. In the end I married for man with great mental strength and moderately handsome but deeply n love so much that I know that I was in love more with the inner spirit than his physical attractiveness. These days, I am much more drawn to people with inner beauty shown through caring, loving spirits, their kindheartedness and the kind of people they surround themselves with; physical beauty fades and with years it becomes obvious who the person is and it shows in their smiles, their actions towards others. I kinda get the feeling that you are perhaps much younger than me and a little too obsessed with others thinking about your being "beautiful."

a reply to: rukia

Symmetrical, my butt is symmetrical, does that make me a smart a$$?

On a serious note, look at Stephen Fry for instance, his nose is smeared across his face , yet i believe him to be a very smart person.

A question, beauty and sexual attractiveness are they one and the same, some guys married super model wives but cheat with their less than super model girl friends or even maids ,ex Arnold Schwarzenegger, Prince Charles, Tiger Woods and the list goes on and on.
Beauty have to come with more than just symmetry and mind you Iam not above taking a head turn when some hot looking lady passes by.

Personally I don't go for the classical beauty type.
The ladies who attract me are the ones who are quirky and something different about them.
And gingers.....blooming gingers every single time love at first sight. They use their evil ginger magic against me NOOOOOOOOOO!.
Also their laugh.

a reply to: boymonkey74

Blue eyed irish ginge.... ahh, and the accent ...ahh

a reply to: scubagravy

NO!! don't go there I'm attempting to ween myself off them.

Back to the OP.

Sorry ladies but you lot can be right bitches..as soon as a new young support worker starts at my work the knives and little remarks come out.
I shake my head.
Us men can't be arse being jealous of each others looks (never met a more handsome and modest person as myself remember ).

I'm bloody gorgeous, but not too intelligent. What went wrong? Maybe too much time snogging behind the bike shed not enough in the classroom, different priorities back then.

Besides all the usual objections of beauty being in the eye of the beholder and all that,
there is some real truth to certain appearences being perceived as attractive by a majority in any given society,
and that brings with it certain types of challenges, difficulties and heartache.
But in my experience, those are just about impossible to talk about. Any discussion I have ever seen attempted on the subject result only in bitterness and cruelty.

It is not considered humble to speak of this subject in terms of your own experience.

Some of the most beautiful people I have ever known developed the habit of degrading themselves in their own mind constantly, in order to keep from getting "a big head", and end up having lower self esteem than others commonly considered less attractive. This is usually nurtured by caretakers early in life, who avoid giving positive feedback for fear of the child becoming "stuck up" one day. ...and so it goes, with everyone around them so concerned about not feeding their ego, peers being jealous, members of the opposite sex feeling intimidated and keeping a distance, the most beautiful people end up hating themselves because it seems everyone else does.

But we can see some truly beautiful people who also are able to make others feel comfortable, because they do not have low self esteem, and are very outgoing. The people close to them did not raise them with concern about them being over confident. That has made me think that the focus on being humble is stupid and destructive.

originally posted by: woodwardjnr
I'm bloody gorgeous, but not too intelligent. What went wrong? Maybe too much time snogging behind the bike shed not enough in the classroom, different priorities back then.

I do not find any correlation with beauty and intelligence some folks are just dizzy no matter what they looked like, how ever finding a mate or hookup is quicker if the female fills the what passes for beauty in her society...among men beauty is usually in the eye of his bank account or title.

If this guy was simply Mark Zuckerberg the Walmart register guy how many ladies would he attract.

originally posted by: AdmireTheDistance
Oh good lord....How old are you, 15? I've got news for you: Beauty is entirely subjective, and you're not as beautiful as you think. Grow up and quit being so vain.

FYI, neither are you princess...

The hypocrisy of telling a mature adult to grow up while acting just like a child only demonstrates the type of tortured and dark persona that Rukia mentioned.

Hard to believe that 12 other people would agree with a comment that reeks of so much hate.

Well, I'm glad my mrs wasn't too hung up on beauty to date a stubbly, dirty cycle tramp like me

17 yrs married next June.

a reply to: rukia

Rukia, beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

There are definitions of beauty culturally, but these change. Traditionally, it has been men who have set the standards and aesthetics of feminine beauty. May be in our modern era not so much.

If I am honest I can not say what is beautiful to me. I appreciate the diversity. I find Japanese women attractive, African women, Arabic women, European women, American women, Native American women, etc to be equally endowed.

I do not think symmetry is the central necessity of beauty at all. It is very subjective Rukia.

The media dictates beauty and I guess many people just accept what they are told. The media can even tell them who they should consider beautiful. I use my own eyes and have my own tastes.

The media tells people that tall women are he most desirable. I do not think that is a necessity of beauty. That goes for men, too. Tom Cruise is not very tall, but many women find him adorable.

Who can really say they know what beauty is and dictate that to everybody else?

Stay beautiful, OP!

a reply to: Revolution9

Yup I agree.
Thing is also beauty isn't just physical someone can have a beautiful soul or presence.
I reckon it is also to do with pheromones also.

originally posted by: boymonkey74
Sorry ladies but you lot can be right bitches..as soon as a new young support worker starts at my work the knives and little remarks come out.
I shake my head.
Us men can't be arse being jealous of each others looks (never met a more handsome and modest person as myself remember

).

Quite right again - My missus is doing her nut right now because I have to talk to a 24 year old girl who works as an Incident Manager at my work.

Yes, we've become mates and chat quite a bit outside of work via text etc, but nothing is going on. She lives in Manchester, so is some 250 miles from me and none of the messages between us have ever been saucy, but my lady is insanely jealous of her. We ended up having a barny yesterday (Xmas Day!) because we exchanged "Merry Christmas" messages.

Yes, this girl is rather hot and is some 9 years my junior but as I said, we're just mates. My missus has got it into her head that given half the chance I would leap into bed with her - my feelings aside, this other girl has not indicated any interest in me like that (I assume - I'm a bloke, I tend not to notice these things) so even if I wanted to, what's to say I could?

My missus seems to think I am God's gift to women and can have whomever I choose - it's nice she thinks that way, but I am reasonably certain it isn't true!

Stick a bunch of women in a room and they will start arguing over something (anything) pretty soon. They all compete with each other a lot more than men ever do. It's like that Family Guy episode where Stuey puts the guys into a VR sim to see if they were truly friends - eventually they do work it out after teaming up to solve what was going on... When he did it to the women, they didn't even try to find out each others names before descending into violence after 5 minutes...

originally posted by: boymonkey74
a reply to: Revolution9

Yup I agree.
Thing is also beauty isn't just physical someone can have a beautiful soul or presence.
I reckon it is also to do with pheromones also.

Well you should know, a stunning hairy beauty like Chewi, lol!

Yes, I think that, too. There is some kind of chemical of attraction at work beyond consciousness.

Hope you and your family had a good Christmas. Hope your work is going ok. Did you get your promotion? You said you were thinking of jacking it in. I hope you managed to resolve it. I did care work for many years. I worked with some very difficult clients, too. I admire what you do. It is mighty hard work, but so vital.

Now the hard work that BM does and his colleagues is very beautiful and attractive to me. I have a very special place in my heart for nurses and care workers.