Stop judging others and learn acceptance so the human species can grow

originally posted by: hounddoghowlie
a reply to: onequestion

so you think that people who steal, rape, rob and kill just because they are hurtin inside or live in the wrong neighborhood, or are drug addicts or any reason other than protecting someone else, themselves or loved ones is alright , and me judging them for being POS is negative?

You are confusing "judging" on a human value level with social justice. If a person breaks a law or harms another, we respond with a system.

Aside from those who victimize others, do you see any reason to show anything less than compassion for your fellow human?

There is a lot of evil going about in the world ... the rich, want to maintain their riches and the powerful want to stay in power. For this to happen, the majority must be subdued. The poor, are willing to join the army to protect the rich, so he can get a dime to buy dinner. The hungry, joins the police force to beat up his brethren for a loaf of bread. The rich kid in the neighbor hood, goes to Woodstock because he's got nothing better to do. The reptile race that rules us, tell the rich kids to become gay, so they won't make any more children in this world, so they can make children in tubes with the right subjective genes.

Now, why shouldn't I judge? why should I turn a blind eye? Because it will make me more happy, to make love rather than hate?

Now, what if playing the devils advocate, is actually what makes me happy?

a reply to: yakidnme

You could always go buy yourself a pair of tights & a bat emblem...

don't need them, i'll tell you to your face what a POS your are, and not really worried about those that might want to take it to the next level.

a reply to: onequestion

S/F

Don't judge other people, offer them compassion and try to understand them instead of choosing weather they are right or wrong. If someone is acting out its more than likely not about what's happening but more likely about what's happening inside them. We need to have more compassion in this world and try to start reaching out to one another and connecting on a deeply emotional level.

I have put a lot of effort into living this philosophy and it's been paying off. I've been noticing that my positive perspective has been benefitting me in the workplace, at the gym, at home, and in my every day dealings.

Yep. Keep at it.
It's what clinical social workers do (I was one for years).
Accept the person at face value, and ask them what's going on in their lives. There are many different approaches and therapeutic methods to choose from -- the idea is to help the client figure out why they are dissatisfied or angry or whatever, and to explore different OPTIONS with them. Teach them new coping skills if they're open to it.

It's generally a build-up of coping skills that at one time worked to keep them balanced enough (relative to their own situations, temperament, personality, etc) but STOP WORKING. This causes dis-ease (uneasiness and counter-productive acting out). When a person figures out how they want their lives to be as opposed to how their lives ARE NOW, they become empowered to act toward those goals.

Goals they set for themselves - the counselor's job is to help them explore all options, decide what they want to accomplish, and learn ways to get it done.

You are right, some people don't want help. That's just how it is. They'll keep spinning in circles until they reach "rock bottom misery" (or a court-room, or both).....indefinitely. Others reach a breaking point and ask for help.

A CSW will work WITH the client to achieve goals SET BY THE CLIENT. (This is as opposed to 'clinical psychologists', who "diagnose" people as BROKEN, and themselves as THE DOCTOR (or expert)). Two different philosophies....psychology is based on the Medical Model (you're sick and I'm going to "cure" you)......clinical social work is based on Client SELF-DETERMINATION.

THE CLIENT is the expert on himself or herself. NOT the counselor. A skilled counselor will be able to build a rapport with the client, and provide a safe environment (FREE OF JUDGMENT) for the person to explore their own options, problems, solutions, etc.



You'd make a good one, by the way. Your experience IRL would lend itself to that.

a reply to: hounddoghowlie

Your posts are a case study in "how to keep the world screwed up." And a poignant example of why we need MORE MENTAL HEALTH CARE.
Pity. It's your sort that are holding us back.

a reply to: Abysha

You are confusing "judging" on a human value level with social justice. If a person breaks a law or harms another, we respond with a system.

no i'm not, any one who does those things that i mentioned other than the stealing, which under certain circumstances i could understand, but i know that there are other ways to get what you need without resorting to that. i judge and hold utter contempt for them. i consider them to be scum of the earth and wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire. plain enough for you.

Aside from those who victimize others, do you see any reason to show anything less than compassion for your fellow human?

of course i do, people that can't do for themselves, people that may have mental problems, people that have lost their jobs, people that may have addictions that haven't resorted to doing any of the things i mentioned, and several other conditions they might find themselves in due to no fault of their own. i would help and have whole heartedly a few times beyond what i thought i was going to do.

i've been there and never resorted to doing those things. i've dealt with being poor, i've dealt with addiction, i've dealt with heartbreak, i've dealt with a bad home life, i've dealt with rejection, yet i continued on and went to work, didn't kill any one, didn't start sh@@ because i was a dick head, didn't steal because i was hungry(which by the way is one of the reason i could understand stealing, but know there are ways to avoid it), i've dealt with living in a bad neighbor hood. and you know what, i didn't rape anyone, i didn't kill any one, i didn't start sh@@ with anyone because i was a dickhead and hurting inside, i didn't steal anything, i didn't blame everyone else, i didn't lay around sorrying away with my hand out.

no i have no compassion for those that are sorry sad sacks that want to blame every thing they do or their circumstances on something else, that themselves choose to do on their circumstances or up bringing or anything else but where the fault is, them for going that way.

a reply to: hounddoghowlie

no i'm not, any one who does those things that i mentioned other than the stealing, which under certain circumstances i could understand, but i know that there are other ways to get what you need without resorting to that. i judge and hold utter contempt for them. i consider them to be scum of the earth and wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire. plain enough for you.

Overcompensate much?

:-)

We got your number hounddog

a reply to: hounddoghowlie

You said the magic words!!

of course i do,
people that can't do for themselves,
people that may have mental problems,
people that have lost their jobs, people that may have addictions that haven't resorted to doing any of the things i mentioned, and several other conditions they might find themselves in due to no fault of their own. i would help and have whole heartedly a few times beyond what i thought i was going to do.

Glad to hear it.

i've been there and never resorted to doing those things. i've dealt with being poor, i've dealt with addiction, i've dealt with heartbreak, i've dealt with a bad home life, i've dealt with rejection, yet i continued on and went to work, didn't kill any one, didn't start sh@@ because i was a dick head, didn't steal because i was hungry(which by the way is one of the reason i could understand stealing, but know there are ways to avoid it), i've dealt with living in a bad neighbor hood. and you know what, i didn't rape anyone, i didn't kill any one, i didn't start sh@@ with anyone because i was a dickhead and hurting inside, i didn't steal anything, i didn't blame everyone else, i didn't lay around sorrying away with my hand out. "

You aren't "mentally ill", then. People who do the things you abhor are MENTALLY ILL.

We need more MENTAL HEALTH CARE.
Get it?

originally posted by: hounddoghowlie
a reply to: onequestion

i will continue to judge scumbags, killers, rapist, theifs, dick heads that start sh@@ just because their dick heads, and anyone of these types. just because your witttle feelings are hurtin you inside, or you live in the bad neighbor hood or what ever reason you want to use, is no reason to to mess with other people.

Agreed. I was about to write similar! Its important not to accept such bad behaviours because we'll be morally corrupt in the end. Its a form of dumping down if we accept such behaviours. Im tired, bed time for me so excuse any bad grammar!!! I'll see replies later!

i'm trying to teach myself to walk that path. but the obstacles (of my own making as well as others) are many. my mum used to say 'if you have nothing nice to say, then don't say anything'. that was maybe a somewhat naive and idealistic philosophy but i see where she was coming from. unfortunately, as rexsblues said earlier, "Kindness will always be perceived as weakness, no matter false it is you know that to be." certainly by some. human social interaction can be a bit of a minefield.

a reply to: onequestion

Being a recluse, paradoxically i figured out how compassion, forgiveness, acceptance could potentially transform relationships even with strangers. I assume that an excellent leader is someone that would possess these three attributes.

With that said, i dont consider any of them to be useful in this age. Detachment works way better for spiritual purposes. If the goal is simply to make your local and social life better, then sure go for it. But as a solution to all world's problems or any at all, just a pipedream like global awakening..

If we were talking about something else than egotistical humans, i would agree. But unless you learn to make the difference between an ego and a genuine soul, you wont achieve anything remotely proportional to the efforts and energy spent. The reason is this, weak willed egos will unconsciously feed on stronger people. Energetic vampirism heard of it? As below so above. The ego is parasite in nature, thus like a parasite it will act. See it like an energy being you have a more or less intimate relationship with to the point you dont even see it as a separate entity but confuse it with the You. It feeds on anything positive or negative, the whole emotional spectrum. So when you have people that lost things in ugly ways, it leaves marks and empty spots that need be filled by something else. A few examples are new relations, drugs, hobbies, desires, OCD, entertainment,... If a particularly benevolent individual become their friend or whatever, they will instantly rely on him and suck up his energy like leeches with blood.

Dont you feel too tired?

WILL!!! never.... HAPPEN11111111111111

tHERE i SAID IT.

LEARN TO DEAL WITH STUPID HUMANS.

But probably, you're just lunatic for saying that.

originally posted by: _damon Being a recluse

hey me too! cheers, fellow recluse

I think some good first steps are changing how we satiate greed, and how we define what terms and goals should be met by social assistance.

Currently, instead of focusing on actual improvements to quality of life, we primarily focus on numbers and paper. By shifting away from the middleman of fiat currency to items of "real value," we begin to build a perspective that is more relevant to everyone.

In our pursuit of an ever-increasing quality of life, value should be placed on the items and services that actually impact QoL, rather than the fiat currency used in transactions.

Then, it becomes about figuring out structures and systems that promote and enable the populations pursuit of a better life. In that, social nets should be more encompassing, but more importantly, are designed to enable independence and self sufficiency. A "basic need" in this context, could be seen as "those items and services whose cost for their mass implementation is outweighed by the net benefit of their inclusion."

Why go into all that in this thread? Because I think we have been looking at it all wrong. I think solutions are out there that can appeal to the selfish and altruistic alike. In that, greed can be satiated to a greater degree while also being beneficial to others, rather than detrimental.

A clever, properly incentivized system could truly change the world, especially over several genetations. But, if we instead wait for, or even force, people to be "just like us," nothing is going to change. Ever.

Maybe our true strength will only start to be known when we are able to see our differences, and actively utilize them as something that makes humanity stronger instead of something to be smashed into the mold we think is best.

Is humanity clever enough to pull it off yet? Maybe not, but maybe we should be..

I'll submit that judgment and compassion are not incompatible and should generally be exercised hand in hand. Let's say you have a child or family member and you find they're abusing drugs. Is it compassionate to ignore the pain this could cause them and those around them? I think you should use sound judgment to understand where this could lead and how to stop things from turning out for the worst. Compassion would help you understand how to do this.

Maybe you mean we should just judge actions and not people. You may say a good person can do bad things and vice versa. It may well be useful to identify some as bad people though. Society should encourage its members to be good people and to overcome bad people. I think we should attempt to convert bad people to good, but that's easier said than done. If someone is a liar, thief, sexual predator or dangerous person; it is not compassionate to ignore their behavior. It is not compassionate to their victims to tell them you won't judge. It isn't compassionate not to warn those who could become victims that their dealing with a dangerous person. The only compassion a villain deserves is for encouraging them to turn from their evil ways.

If you're going to try to stick to the mantra that judging is always wrong, you'll be forced to withhold judgement from the judgmental. If I look down on another culture for abusing women and children, and you tell me I must respect whatever comes from another culture and put all my personal feelings and morals aside; then you are looking down at me and my culture. How can you say inflicting pain and mutilation (or even death) on innocent people (even animals) should be respected, but looking upon such things with disgust and disapproval is the worst? You then would be approving savagery and judging against me for disproving it.

Judgement is about balance between justice and mercy. Too much either way upsets the balance.

It's always the biggest failures demand others "accept" them.

So when a group like Black Lives Matter pushes a blatant lie like "hands up don't shoot" I am suppose to reflect on what they are feeling inside. LOL! I don't think so. I see it for what it is and life is to short to get inside that groups diseased mind.

originally posted by: hounddoghowlie
a reply to: onequestion

so you think that people who steal, rape, rob and kill just because they are hurtin inside or live in the wrong neighborhood, or are drug addicts or any reason other than protecting someone else, themselves or loved ones is alright , and me judging them for being POS is negative?

Judging drug addicts as pos, yes, that's a ridiculously narrow minded and ignorant veiwpoint.