Your coffee sucks! ......double double the rage.

I'm not a fussy coffee drinker. If it's horrible, it's horrible; and, if it's really nice, I appreciate that. Otherwise, 90% of coffee I have put in my mouth has been drinkable.

In Canada, we have a coffee culture that surrounds our national chain, Tim Hortons. The coffee they serve is...a national treasure, yes, but in truth, it's no better than any other Arabica bean coffee you would find anywhere else.

This brings us to other coffee available in Canada. You have your smaller chains, who all have their own blends and fans. Then...you have the third place coffee provider for on the go Canadians, the humble gas station. Most of these gas stations have their own blend of coffee, Arabica bean, to mimic Tims Hortons. They brew it to the same standards, it's not rocket science, and then it is left up to the customer to makeup as they like. As long as it hasn't been sitting in a thermos or in a pot for hours, which sometimes it has, but most times it hasn't, it will taste, black, just like most chain coffee.

This morning, while at a gas station, I was making a coffee when another patron exclaimed to me, " This stuff is swill! Why does all gas station coffee taste like sh*t?" I replied, " Tastes fine to me."
He got inline, and then explained in great detail why he would not be paying for the coffee. The cashier did not care. A coffee isn't going to kill the business. Then he said, "I put in two creamers and two sugar packets. That's a double double, but this tastes like sh*t."

A) You're likely on the verge of mental instability if you feel the need to talk to retail workers like this.
And;
B) That's not what goes into a double double.

After sharing an eye roll, the retail worker disclosed that they company had put a lot of research into figuring out exactly what was in a double double because they wanted to install signage advising customers just how much cream and sugar to add for the coffee taste the majority of Canadians enjoy. For obvious reasons, the signage never happened, but she she could tell anyone that for a medium coffee, a double double taste could be achieved by adding 7-8 creamers and 2-3 sugars.

If the cranky coffee maker had ever actually opened up his double double and looked at how creamy it was, he would have instantly seen that the consistency wasn't as creamy at the gas station.This has nothing to do with the base product and everything to do with him, not knowing how to make coffee for himself.

Tim Hortons and other coffee chains have obviously fooled some consumers into thinking coffee making is difficult, a service in need of drive thru automation when in reality....consumers just don't know how to dress their own coffee.

Things like this annoy me for all the wrong reasons and are first world problems, but the bigger lesson here is that ...if you're that person who is addicted to chain coffee and complains about any other coffee...the problem could be you.

originally posted by: Atsbhct
...a double double taste could be achieved by adding 7-8 creamers and 2-3 sugars.

Jesus Christ, that is a lot of creamer and sugar for a medium coffee.

No wonder you Canadians are able to tolerate your never-changing seasons.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Exactly. We're all cream fattened and energized by cane sugar.

originally posted by: Atsbhct

Exactly. We're all cream fattened and energized by cane sugar.

Well, I guess the sugar coma helps dull the incessant pounding of pothole-filled roadways.

a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

And so does the cream fattening.

originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus

originally posted by: Atsbhct
...a double double taste could be achieved by adding 7-8 creamers and 2-3 sugars.

Jesus Christ, that is a lot of creamer and sugar for a medium coffee.

No wonder you Canadians are able to tolerate your never-changing seasons.

Also, our standard creamer has 11 mls of cream. So 77 - 88mls or 5 tablespoons in a 16 fluid ounce cup.

a reply to: Atsbhct

We like to stock up the fat for the winter like a squirrel during the fall.

Here's a secret, Tim Horton's coffee is nothing more than Mother Parkers coffee.
It's OK, I am not sure why people go crazy over the place, food is sub par, menu is always changing, coffee is sub par, McDonalds coffee is better. I think the only reason why people go there is because it's convenient, and you can always find one, and it's rather cheap.

a reply to: strongfp

I think it's all down to marketing, but I just don't get it. Here's one particular example of Tim Hortons patronage that I don't understand.

Several people in my small town who are retirees get up every morning and drive 10 -15 minutes one way to pick up Tim Hortons coffee and take it home. Why? Why! Just purchase a coffee maker?

So they're paying 4-5 dollars for two coffees, plus gas every...day...and then some will complain about pension checks or social security being not enough to get by on. In a lot of cases it probably isn't, but my own grandparents did fine, and they were of the frugal generation.

a reply to: Atsbhct

It's routine for them.

My father retired years ago yet still, every morning, he wakes up nice and early and heads out to the same deli he's always gone to.

Im on the tail end of a 120HR coffee binge... I was banging 2 Litre jars (yep, good old glass jars) ... Ive got Templars blood..

Any time anyone references the taste of feces you are required to ask how they know what human ejectamenta tastes of.

btw anyone got one of those keurigs kold? some sort of cyber tuesday deal going on.

Got insulin? I started drinking it black last year after weening off of artificial sweetener; now I cannot stand to put anything in my coffee, it just seems to rob the taste...

Growing up my father would use the real "half & half" creamer and sugar..

I find coffee snobs to be rather amusing. I love good coffee but I'm not paying what a whole can of it in the grocery store costs for one cup at SnootyTooties coffee (yeah Starbucks I'm talking to YOU). I make my own at home, since I only drink one cup a day anyway.

As far as the guy whining about the coffee at a GAS STATION, he probably whines about everything, everywhere he goes. Imagine how fussy he gets over the toilet paper in the public restroom.

originally posted by: strongfp
a reply to: Atsbhct

We like to stock up the fat for the winter like a squirrel during the fall.

Here's a secret, Tim Horton's coffee is nothing more than Mother Parkers coffee.
It's OK, I am not sure why people go crazy over the place, food is sub par, menu is always changing, coffee is sub par, McDonalds coffee is better. I think the only reason why people go there is because it's convenient, and you can always find one, and it's rather cheap.

Coffee, like anything else, is an acquired taste. I have had all kinds, and Mother Parker's tastes nothing like Tim's to my taste buds. Mother Parkers tastes like it was made with the water from a spring mud puddle. Complete with the sand and rock salt to boot. Usually I opt for McD's or Tim's based on location or convenience. This past Sunday, I did just that..opted for McD's because it was right across the street. Pffft. It was unusually HORRIBLE. Tasted like it had been sitting burning all day while simmering someone's recently cast off cigarette butts. I took two sips and dumped it. Back to Timmy's for my French Vanilla Cappuccino.

originally posted by: Atsbhct
a reply to: strongfp

I think it's all down to marketing, but I just don't get it. Here's one particular example of Tim Hortons patronage that I don't understand.

Several people in my small town who are retirees get up every morning and drive 10 -15 minutes one way to pick up Tim Hortons coffee and take it home. Why? Why! Just purchase a coffee maker?

So they're paying 4-5 dollars for two coffees, plus gas every...day...and then some will complain about pension checks or social security being not enough to get by on. In a lot of cases it probably isn't, but my own grandparents did fine, and they were of the frugal generation.

It's to socialize, as far as I can tell. A reason to leave the house. Many will deliberately meet up at the local ones here everyday. Some things are more important than money.

a reply to: FissionSurplus

This was my thought. Homemade is WAY better! And complaining about gas station coffee??? Seriously? LOL!

a reply to: AccessDenied

My aunt worked at Head office for 15 years and they got it delivered from the Mother parkers distribution centre in Mississauga, it may have been a slightly different bean, or probably more fresh as I'd imagine coffee deliveries would be rather frequent to Tim's franchises.
Find yourself a free trade coffee shop, usually they are Columbia, and get it straight from the source, it's a bit on the expensive side but it's worlds better than what you get anywhere else. Because down there they keep the good beans and the harvest that is best suited for coffee harvesting.
A friend of mine is Colombian, she goes down maybe once a year, I get her to bring me back just their average coffee you get from the grocer, and it's amazing, might be slight placebo effect, but I've gotten compliments from family and friends.

originally posted by: Benevolent Heretic

And complaining about gas station coffee??? Seriously? LOL!

Sorta like bitching about Pizza Hut not tasting like real Italian pizza.

originally posted by: Benevolent Heretic
a reply to: FissionSurplus

This was my thought. Homemade is WAY better! And complaining about gas station coffee??? Seriously? LOL!

The only coffee I drink is the stuff that comes out of my Mr. Coffee coffeemaker every morning (no, I haven't been persuaded to pay a lot of money for a Keurig... plus, I don't drink one cup, I drink six! And Mr. Coffee doesn't grow mold inside of it).
If I am not home on a given morning for some reason, I don't even think about buying brewed coffee somewhere because I am usually disappointed.

a reply to: FissionSurplus

I L O V E the way (in the morning 0500-0700) the "coffee snobs all hauling @sh to the $tarbucks in their Land Rovers and Porsche 4 doors, only to have a wreck there once or twice a week.... LOL

Most are the soccer moms taking the kids to school talking on their cell phones to other soccer moms (probably about things that are vitally important




Seriously, i purchase a bag of coffee for 7.00 @ the store and it lasts me a few weeks..