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Your rude horoscope

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posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 06:56 AM
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Just passing on

Your rude horoscope
Its kind of rude and to the point. Don't get mad just read it and chill.

Cancer
You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems which makes you a sucker. You always keep putting things off this is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a s***. Everybody in prison is a cancer

Sagittarius
You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarius's are drunks. Nixon was a Sagittarius.

Scorpio
The worst of the lot !!! You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your lack of ethics. You are perfect son of a ***. Most Scorpios are MURDERED.

Libra
You are artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. If you're male you are probably Queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. Most libra women are hoes. All Libra's die of venereal disease

Virgo
You are there logical type and hate disorder. Your s*** picking attitude is sickening to your co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while ****ing. Virgo's make good bus drivers and pimps.

Leo
You consider yourself a born leader everyone thinks you're an idiot. most Leo's are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism and your arrogance is disgusting. Leos are thieving and enjoy masturbating more then sex.

Gemini
You are quick and intelligent thinker. people like you because you're bisexual. You're inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard. Gemini's are notorious for thriving on incest

Taurus
You are practical and persistent you have a dogged determination and stick-to-it-ivness because you never do anything right the first time. Most people think you're stubborn and bullheaded.

Aries
You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and scornful of advice. You do nothing but piss off everyone you came in to contact with.

Pisces
You have a vivid imagination and often think you're being followed by the FBI or CIA. You have a minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting what you mistake as power. You completely lack confidence

Aquarius
You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you're stupid. Everyone thinks you're a joke

Capricorn
You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You're basically a chickensh**. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance... you should just kill yourself



www.monkeywiththehat.com...
edit on 1-12-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)




posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:04 AM
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now if horoscope whas always like this i would read it



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:20 AM
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a reply to: Layaly




Virgo
You are there logical type and hate disorder. Your s*** picking attitude is sickening to your co-workers. You are cold and unemotional and often fall asleep while ****ing. Virgo's make good bus drivers and pimps.



lol
Well............Maybe if they weren't so incompetent, I wouldn't be so picky
And if I fall asleep while,,,,erm...you know......I need a better partner.



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:22 AM
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There is more .. Haven't read it yet so I hope it's not too full on



SCORPIO: The sex addict

Can be mean. EXTREMELY sexy. Intelligent. Energetic. Predict
future. Most erotic. (Freak in bed.) (GREAT kisser.) Always get
what they want. Sexy. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long
relationships. Talkative. The sexiest ever....Romantic. Caring.



SAGITTARIUS: The Sexy one

Spontaneous. Horny. Freak in Bed. High appeal. Rare to find. Great
when found. Loves being in long relationships.Their Love is one of
a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring
person you will ever meet. Amazing in Bed! Did I say Amazing in
Bed? Not the kind of person you wanna be with you might end up
crying.



VIRGO: The Virgin

Dominant in relationships. Sexy. someone loves them right now.
Freak in bed. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart.
Intellectual. Attractive. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to
forget Love at first sight. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to
please. The one and only. Ultimate sexiness.



LIBRA: The lame lover

Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love
is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness.
Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing n Bed..!!! Did I say
Amazing in Bed? not the kind of person you wanna #### with... u
might end up crying... the most irresistible.



ARIES: The Liar

Outgoing. Lovable.
Spontanious. Not one to #### with. Erotic. Funny. Take you on trips
to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy. Loves being in
long relationships.=) Addictive. Loud. best in bed.



AQUARIUS: Does it in the water

Trustworthy. Sexy. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in
long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will
exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights
out. Amazing in bed, THE BEST LOVERS BETTER THAN EVERYONE!



GEMINI: Does Twosomes

Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in bed.
Lover not a fighter, but
will still knock you the #### out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud.
Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a
beautiful
smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST IRRESISTABLE.



LEO: The Master Of Love

MOST AMAZING KISSER. AMAZING IN BED...Great talker. Sexy and
passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at
loving. Great kisser.The one. So much love to give.Unpredictable.
Outgoing. Down to earth. Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being
in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to
find. Has the last word. The best to find, hardest to keep.Good
when found.



CANCER: The Cutie

Very high sex appeal. Great in bed!!! Love is one of a kind. Very
romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative.
Extremely random and proud of it. Spontaneous. Great tellin
stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes
down to it.
Someone you should hold on to.
repost.



PISCES: The Piece of Azz

Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high ### appeal. Fun to be around. Freak in the sheets.
Extremely weird but in a good way. Super good in bed. Good Sense of
Humor!!! Thoughtful. A partner for life. Always gets what he or she
wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.



CAPRICORN: The passionate Lover

Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future.
Irrestible, awesome kisser. Loves being in long relationships.
Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST
in BED. Very sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini's in sports.
Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Loves to be your first. So you'll
never forget. Smart.



TAURUS: The Tramp

Aggressive. Freak in bed. Rare to find! Loves being in long
relationships.=] Likes to give a good fight for what they want.
Extremely outgoing. Sexy as ........ Loves to help people in times
of need. Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality.
Stubborn. Sexual as .........
Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind. Not one to
#### with. Are the most sexiest people on earth!



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:25 AM
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originally posted by: Layaly
Cancer
You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems which makes you a sucker. You always keep putting things off this is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a s***. Everybody in prison is a cancer


I procrastinate so much.

I have some other thoughts, but I'll come back later and share them.



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:25 AM
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a reply to: Layaly


Most Scorpios are MURDERED.


Yeah, I can see that being my ultimate demise.



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:27 AM
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Well I must admit, I do love to "bust".



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:30 AM
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lol you people



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:31 AM
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a reply to: Layaly

What do you mean, "you people"!?



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:47 AM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: Layaly


Most Scorpios are MURDERED.


Yeah, I can see that being my ultimate demise.


Ditto



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:53 AM
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Aries
You are a pioneer type and think most people are dickheads. You are quick to reprimand, impatient and scornful of advice. You do nothing but piss off everyone you came in to contact with.


That's high praise



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 07:56 AM
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originally posted by: Layaly
VIRGO: The Virgin

Dominant in relationships. Sexy. someone loves them right now.
Freak in bed. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart.
Intellectual. Attractive. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to
forget Love at first sight. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to
please. The one and only. Ultimate sexiness.

HEY. I do not always have to have the last wo --- did I say I was done? Get back here, dammit, I'm not finished talking. I SAID GET BACK HERE, we're not done yet!



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:06 AM
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a reply to: Nyiah

You have a problem:


VIRGO: The Virgin


I have a solution:


SCORPIO: The sex addict
Most erotic. (Freak in bed.)



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:08 AM
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Why is this in jokes? LMAO!



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:11 AM
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a reply to: Layaly

Taurus
"You are practical and persistent you have a dogged determination and stick-to-it-ivness because you never do anything right the first time. Most people think you're stubborn and bullheaded. "

Yeah, that's about right...well except the not getting done right the first time. That's about a 70/40 thing. 70% right the first time 40% having to redo. lol



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:38 AM
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a reply to: Layaly

All cancers aren't "in prison" nor are all scorpios "murdered".

Rude, alright.

Why hide behind "horoscope" , to guarantee everyone will come and be insulted. If one just printed they think everyone is an asshole, nobody will read it.



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:39 AM
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I would like to add some real rude traits





Which are the most dangerous zodiac signs according to FBI data;

The sign of a person is directly related to the type of crime that is likely to commit …. Analyzing data on the FBI arrested zodiac serial killer experts came to what signs are the most dangerous in terms of criminal behavioral problems.The signs are divided into four different categories : Fire , Water , Earth and Air.

Fire signs are Sagittarius , Aries and Leo
Of the three, Sagittarius has the largest number of criminals and is the most difficult to capture , Aries is usually the most heavily armed , but is actually more dangerous than the fire sign is Leo.

Air signs are Libra , Gemini and Aquarius Libras are the most criminal record compared with other air signs and are usually armed and very dangerous. On the other Geminis often involved in crimes of fraud , while Aquarius usually commit crimes in order to revenge .

Earth Signs are Capricorn , Virgo and Taurus This category criminals arrested almost normally . Taurus is the most temperamental and therefore dangerous, Virgo is also usually heavily armed , while the criminal record of a Capricorn has a bit of everything .

Water signs are Cancer , Scorpio and Pisces Cancers have the vast majority of criminals among all the zodiac signs and is also very violent , while Scorpio and Pisces are also quite irritable .

According to the website of FBI, Cancers are the most dangerous criminals of all signs , followed by Tauruses in the second position . Third come Sagittarius and in the fourth position come Aries, followed in descending order Capricorn , Virgo , Libra , Pisces , Scorpio , Leo , Aquarius and Gemini which are last in the list since their crimes are rarely associated with violence , but mostly with frauds and scams .

Cancers are mostly passion killers .They kill almost normally and leave some distinguishing marks on the body of their victims to sign their crime .

Tauruses are usually involved in money laundering and usually act alone without accomplices .

Sagittarius are crooks and thieves , but rarely harm the victim unless the danger of their own lives.

Aries is usually hired to do crimes , while Capricorns are mostly involved in organized crime .

Scorpios emerged as the most sadistic and murderous signs, while Virgos are usually burglars or hackers .

Libras are steeped in corruption , while Pisces involved mostly in crimes related to drugs.

On the other hand, Geminis are not particularly dangerous and are usually associated with financial frauds and thefts bloodless . Instead of Leos who usually entangled in criminal activities to gain fame and recognition , so they do not deal with petty crime . Finally, Aquarius are hackers and are specialized in deception .

www.astrawoman.com...

After reading this, I suspect no one is really innocent lol



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 08:55 AM
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a reply to: Op3nM1nd3d

what in the world ?? That's too good

ATS crazies

Oh lord and you know what I would so sign my art work
(cancer)
edit on 1-12-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 09:11 AM
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a reply to: Layaly

lol...it seems we are all ticking time bombs walking around
Cancers seem to be the worst and I happen to know a few of them and I have to admit that sometimes their thoughts and outbursts are just scary



posted on Dec, 1 2015 @ 09:23 AM
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originally posted by: AugustusMasonicus
a reply to: Nyiah

You have a problem:


VIRGO: The Virgin


I have a solution:


SCORPIO: The sex addict
Most erotic. (Freak in bed.)

ROTFL. Mattress Mambo is quite possibly a better medicine than laughter

However, I already have myself a:



PISCES: The Piece of Azz

Freak in the sheets.






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