It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

I'm 28 years old, I've never had a girlfriend or kissed anyone ever

page: 11
42
<< 8  9  10    12  13  14 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Nov, 21 2015 @ 03:32 PM
link   
a reply to: anobody

Are you Autistic? That would explain any comunication issues you may have.
Do you have trouble making male friends too?

There are several levels of Autism which include mild levels that often go undiagnosed.

Just an idea.




posted on Nov, 21 2015 @ 10:55 PM
link   
a reply to: anobody

Alcohol



posted on Nov, 21 2015 @ 11:40 PM
link   
Use your lack of experience to your advantage. Women love a guy that's inexperienced, sexually.. They feel like they can teach you things. The best way I've found is to start getting in shape. Start running and losing some fat and gaining some muscle.

You don't need to play the 'game' if women are throwing themselves at you before you initiate.

Thats how Ive done it.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 05:23 AM
link   
I've been in a similar position for myself for some time. As far as the being at a point where I may just not care enough to pursue anyone. The main question I have for you is. Do you even want a relationship with someone and if so, what's the motivation for that?

Do you want something meaningful or are you after the more physical aspect of it? Nothing wrong with wanting physical intimacy. If sex is a primary factor, escorts/prostitutes shouldn't be out of the question. Acquiring the services of someone with a professional reputation is a more logical way to approach getting sex.

I am assuming you are a virgin by the way. Point being is that it can help to allow you to feel more comfortable about engaging the opposite sex on multiple levels. Aid in reducing the barriers you may have unintentionally put in place socially over the years.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 07:55 AM
link   
I was just coaching a friend with a similar issue. He's had girlfriend(s) in the past (not many, I'm sure). He's a very sweet guy, but very shy. He wants a serious relationship, but he's waiting to be more stable (as in with his job and money). Boy, that made me laugh!

There is no stopping point in life. There is no point where you say, "Ok, now I'm in the right circumstances I can get married." or "Now I'm in the right circumstances I can have a baby." There is no stopping point. You just find the point that's close enough, take a deep breath and jump in feet first!

1. Being in a relationship should never be a goal. You have no control over others. An actual GOAL should be something you can achieve by yourself.
2. Having said that, if it's really important to you to have a relationship with someone, then bust your ass to make that happen. Trying and failing is better than sitting around with your thumb up your butt.
3. Join a dating site, join a church or club, go to events where there will be a variety of people. I'd be willing to bet it's slim pickings in your living room.
4. Practice on non-dating targets. When I first started college I was terrified to go up and talk to strangers. I FORCED myself to do it. The more I did, it the more comfortable I got with it. And if you can strike up random conversation with strangers, then you'll improve your conversation skills with someone you're attracted to.
5. You're not getting any younger.

IF you really, truly desire someone to have a romantic relationship with then you are going to have to put forth some effort.
IF you really, truly don't care if you find a relationship....you just get smacked by loneliness from time to time...then get a puppy, get a prostitute, play video games, whatever floats your boat...until you die.

It sounds harsh, but those are your options. Now you need to ask yourself, what is important to you?



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 08:13 AM
link   
PS There are many different versions of your problem OP. Just knowing you're not alone should make you feel a little better.

All I ever wanted was to get married and have kids. Simple enough, right? I have no problem dating guys. I'm fun to hang out with and I'm super laid back in relationships. But for some reason as soon as things take a serious turn, they turn to complete sh*t. After 2 divorces, pushing 30, ready to eat a gun because I thought my dreams would NEVER happen I happened to have a friend that threw this out there "You don't HAVE to be married to have kids. You can do it on your own, no problem." So simple, but I had never even considered it.

I got a friend to be a donor, had a beautiful baby girl, and it was the most amazing blessing that I could ever hope for. Since then I've had one more boy and I'm pregnant right now. I love my babies and I love my life. I'm a great mom and the whole thing is better than I could ever have hoped for. I've been single for over 8 years, and I've come to accept that a serious, loving relationship with a decent guy is just not in the cards for me.

I said it before, and I'll say it again. Do some soul searching and decide what you REALLY want. What are you REALLY missing? Is is the physical stuff? Kissing and sex and cuddling. Do you really want a real relationship? (Highly overrated, if you ask me.) Is it something you really want, really bad? Or maybe just something you're curious about? Pinpointing and acknowledging your feelings will go a long way to resolving them.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 11:59 AM
link   

originally posted by: Silvertrowel
a reply to: anobody

Are you Autistic? That would explain any comunication issues you may have.
Do you have trouble making male friends too?

There are several levels of Autism which include mild levels that often go undiagnosed.

Just an idea.


No I'm not autistic. Well I actually have a bit of hearing loss and accent.....I just watched The Good Will Hunting movie last night and that # made me cry, that guy is basically me minus the romantic life which I don't have.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 12:04 PM
link   
a reply to: ladyvalkyrie

Thank you for your posts. What is important to me? Well I know I want a career that I can depend and survive on, but at the same time I wish I had a girl.....that we could support the personal growth with each other, love each other and have shoulders to put our heads on. I'm trying to get education....


edit on 22-11-2015 by anobody because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 12:24 PM
link   
I just think, "No I can't do this. Girlfriends are expensive anyway", I just think "No, she's probably better off with someone else", I just think, "No I'm not worth it".....I don't know.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 03:41 PM
link   
I was just thinking about a similar topic just yesterday!!! Because I had just got out of a miserable abusive 10 year relationship, I'm terrified but almost needy of a new relationship. I don't have much trust in men right now anymore simply because of the idiot I just left. So anyways,I was thinking to myself that maybe if I could meet a man that had only been in a couple relationships or possibly even a virgin, maybe then he'd really appreciate me... Maybe them his feelings would match mine. I know that there is good men out there, but I could never get up the courage to hit on anyone. My heart beats faster with just the thought... And what scares me is, will he care for me, want to be with me, and love me as much as I do him??? Because that's all I want. And know my heart will quickly fall deeply into love with a man who shows compassion and need for me. Therefore, comes my theory, they may be looking for and as needy for love as me.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 07:31 PM
link   
a reply to: buni11687



Ask them a question and they go on and on, and I'm sitting there just like uh-huh, yup, oh that's great, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, etc...... be prepared for these situations to.)


this sentence is just too painful


reply to: AmericanRealist



women who will share that hobby with you. It could be something as simple as clipping your favorite shoes out of catalogues and saving them in a scrapbook. Yea completely random


keeps getting better or more painful



a reply to: woodwardjnr



Lots people willing to put out, the more calls you make the more sales you get.


.................sounds so bad .....



a reply to: Tucket



I'd join your local pua (pick up artist) community and meet up with guys with similar problems.


No waay!! you guys have secret meetings for this ?!



a reply to: texasyeti



Go to church and ask the preacher or whatever if they have a singles group.

Go to places where women are take a yoga class and dont be a perv sit in the front row!


Oh and don't forget to take that strawberries and vodka sexual lubricant



a reply to: HawkeyeNation



Chill bro...making it much bigger than it needs to be.


in that case .. don't chill ?!



a reply to: randyvs



you a lot more than just sex. The average hooker is a fountain of information


Do they come in chocolate ??



a reply to: TechniXcality



Yes because really cute puppies will solve this guys sexual and sensual needs


Well you never know



a reply to: stonerwilliam



Plenty of fish .com if you put up 27 yr old virgin there wanting broken in


Priceless .com




edit on 22-11-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 09:20 PM
link   
a reply to: anobody
You sound A LOT like my friend Jesie. He's a little weird, and very shy...but he's a very sweet guy. He's very sensitive and caring. I told him he needs to find a nurse to date! (Or a nursing assistant.)

I used to be a CNA, so I've worked with lots of nurses. They always fall for the wounded puppy. Lol! Unfortunately this makes them easy targets for jerk guys to take advantage of. If you can find a good nurse/nurse assistant/maybe even vet tech...as a general rule that demographic LOVES to take care of pitiful helpless creatures. Hahaha! But seriously, it sounds like you need to find a very sweet....possibly shy herself....girl.

Don't worry about your education. Don't worry about your job. (I mean, worry about it and strive to do better, but don't let your social life hinge on it.) Just focus on ways locally that you could meet girls that you'd be comfortable with. Baby steps. Meet them first. Talk to them. Don't even worry about dating until you find a girl you like. And when you do ask a girl out for coffee or something, don't panic...it's not a relationship, it's just hanging out for coffee. Like I said before, there is no stopping point in life. You will NEVER reach a point where you go "Ok, everything is perfect, I can get into a serious relationship now." You just have to do it. LIfe is shorter than you realize and you don't want to be on your death bed regretting all the things you SHOULD HAVE done.

PS "Girlfriends are expensive." Well...first of all, every guy I've ever dated has managed to skate without paying for much of anything! Lmao! But seriously, one of the sweetest dates I've ever been on was feeding the ducks at a pond. That cost a whopping $1.50 for a loaf of bread.
"She's better off with someone else." Um...I could tell horror stories from dating guys that would make your jaw drop and your hair turn white. If you 1. aren't verbally or physically abusive 2. a drug addict 3. a thief 4. a cheater of insatiable horniness 5. psychotically jealous 6. prone to stalking 7. a pathological liar ...just to name a few, then any girl you date- think of it as you doing her a favor and protecting her from THOSE guys. Trust me, as long as you're none of these, then you sir, are a catch.
"No I'm not worth it." Well, there's the root of your problem right there. You need to look in the mirror and go "I'm a bad mo fo and any girl would be lucky to have me." Girls can smell fear. They can sense self doubt. And if you don't think you're worth it, why should anyone else?

PPS After I made my last post I remembered my friend Austin from way back. He was pretty much exactly where you are. I coached him, and right around the time he graduated from college he gave eHarmony a try. He met a fantastic Vietnamese girl, they fell in love and got married. With his new degree he walked right in to an awesome job and now they have a kid and live in a nice house. Happily ever after!
Of course I tried eHarmony and didn't even get one date out of them, and then they automatically renewed my subscription, so I paid DOUBLE for nothing. Hell....sometimes it just boils down to luck!



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 09:40 PM
link   
a reply to: ladyinwaiting



then do some "exercises" begin talking to the most non-threatening female you know. A grandmotherly neighbor. A teacher.


this is just too good.. But isn't this against the law ?! Lolo



a reply to: Wolvesandsheeple



I would suggest starting by working on yourself first.


Common .. What kind of advise is this
someone even said to work on urself internally (that was just too much
)


a reply to: indigocld



A female member of the society


Is this some type of sex discrimination act ?
No wait I found your next definition : woman : the scariest predatory animals you can encounter if you provoke them.

edit on 22-11-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 09:49 PM
link   

originally posted by: anobody
a reply to: ladyvalkyrie

Thank you for your posts. What is important to me? Well I know I want a career that I can depend and survive on, but at the same time I wish I had a girl.....that we could support the personal growth with each other, love each other and have shoulders to put our heads on. I'm trying to get education....


Here's something you can try which I beleive can help ya. Try it for a week at least.
Take out a piece of paper or use your iPad and jot down what you believe are YOUR truths or beliefs that you have accumulated in your 27 years of existence. It's probably lots of stuff and facts that you have filled your head with spending countless hours on the Internet , but I want u to just note down some basic truths (positive ones) that u really believe in or can believe , for example ,
-I believe If I work out at least 4 times a week I'll be in good shape
-I believe if I eat this and that and avoid that and drink lots of water I'll get in good shape and be healthy
-I believe if I read positive books and meditate and avoid useless crap on the Internet
I'll become a more positive person and people/women will relate more positive towards me
-I don't believe in any religion but I believe in a creator and some things are impossible to explain
-I believe the power of the mind and how it can affect my health, life , and my reality.
Just try to keep it simple and don't go too overboard, just make sure you really believe in these truths. Look and read through your list every morning. What you have to do is train the sub conscious mind to transform you to the person you know you can be. Here's a tip concerning women, they are great vibe detectors , and you want to attract a women who has and likes good vibes, so you should become someone that projects good vibes, and women love it when you tell them they have cool/good vibe/aura about them.

Then now this might be hard for you but don't go on the Internet for stupid stuff , stop filling your mind with all the crap that's out there only meant to confuse you and prevent you from finding who you truly are. The Internet is a blessing and a curse, it's full of great information and great for people for that insatiable thirst for knowledge but unfortunately its 80% lies and disinformation and pure negativity and the main reason for increasing depression and anxiety in this world.
What this does is makes you become the person you want to be, and not get stuck in the matrix of disinformation, negative thought patterns , and different kinds of propaganda that is filling people's minds and confusing everyone.
The truth is not out there, it's in you.



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 10:18 PM
link   
Boy, people sure do like talking about kissing&stuff.

👄

xxx




posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 10:20 PM
link   
a reply to: ElOmen



At school i learned that woman are like pokemon and u gotta catch them all.


Did they also tell you that to catch them all you need real poke' balls ?!?


a reply to: ladyvalkyrie




There is no stopping point in life. There is no point where you say, "Ok, now I'm in the right circumstances I can get married." or "Now I'm in the right circumstances I can have a baby." There is no stopping point. You just find the point that's close enough, take a deep breath and jump in feet first!


WoW impressive coaching skills !!!
I really enjoyed reading that.. It helped me on a completely unrelated matter .. So thx you


edit on 22-11-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 10:49 PM
link   
Here ya go! Bet you can find some takers! Layaly?




posted on Nov, 22 2015 @ 11:52 PM
link   
Op, do yourself a favor and start watching these guys:

www.youtube.com...
www.youtube.com...

Start here:




posted on Nov, 23 2015 @ 12:07 AM
link   

originally posted by: ladyinwaiting
Here ya go! Bet you can find some takers! Layaly?



Oh lord is that freakin real ?!?
she put it in her ear !!!!
mm yummy




This thread is so hilarious kind of cute kind of gross.. the advice here some is priceless the rest so so
thx for the laughs

edit on 23-11-2015 by Layaly because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 23 2015 @ 12:47 AM
link   
I think I'm conscious of everything and careful of everything......idk if that makes sense lol




top topics



 
42
<< 8  9  10    12  13  14 >>

log in

join