cop not having the heart to tell 4 kids on Halloween their parents died.

Few stories move me to tears,though I am not a hard ass. This is one that got to me. In the link it states a Georgia trooper comes to the door looking for an adult to tell the bad news that both parents will killed in a car wreck. Instead for small kids in costume open the door and say no one is home. This cop does not have what it takes to ruin these 4 kids Halloween like this,so instead people come together to give the kids one last good memory for Halloween. The cops let the kids sleep at the headquarters and they figure,it is better to tell the kids on Nov.1 so Halloween will not be ruined for the rest of their lives. There is now a gofundme for the kids,and they are with grandparents. Poor kids.

www.cnn.com...

a reply to: Dimithae

This cop and his fellow officers could have made a mess of this, but they didn't. They did the right thing. They are to be commended for going above and beyond what their duties called for.

a reply to: Dimithae

I don't get it, could the police not contact the grand parents or something earlier?
What is standard practice for cops in the US? Here in the UK if a responsible adult with care of the children could not be found then they would NOT tell the unsupervised minors in any case.

A car would be sent to collect the closest adult relative and they would be told privately, leaving it up to them to inform the kids as they see fit.
I don't see the OP as compassion unless of course they were acting against policy.
I only think this way because the cops here would not tell unsupervised minors of the death of their parents unless there was no other living adult relative they could tell first.

Maybe the system/policy needs looking at in the US for such circumstances?

I don't know if this was right or wrong procedure but reading this just tore me up inside and I teared up a little. It's reminders like this that makes me appreciate my kids and makes me want to go home and hold them tight.

Just horrible stuff.

ughhh. UGHHHH. I bitch about cops alot , but that is one job I would never ever want. The things these guys have to see or do is sometimes unfathomable to me.

Just UGHHHHH..

Details aside this reminded me of an episode of M.A.S.H where the gang spent there whole christmas day keeping a guy who would not survive alive so his kids would not have to remember that there Dad died on christmas day.

That was one awsome episode, I don't think I could watch that again.

Man I feel like such a slave to my emotions lately lol, almost cried to an episode of Spongebob last night too. I must be going through some form of manstruation.

It's the little things like this that make a big difference in creating the much needed trust between the public and police.

Kudos to the police and all the best to the kids and their future

a reply to: grainofsand

The article says the grandma arrived for the kids "just before dawn" .. not clear on the circumstances but it is very possible she lived hours away and got there as fast as possible. The article also talks about transportation costs for the parents remains, as if they will be buried some distance from where they lived. So it sounds like the cops were responsible for the kids for the night until family could get there, and did a truly heart warming service for them.

a reply to: eeyipes

Thanks for the information.
I'm not criticising here, more questioning though because that would have just been standard practice dealing with minors in the UK. In fact, the minors would have been likely to have remained in the home overnight with either a close family friend adult or a child protection social worker.

Please excuse my questioning all this, but from the outside it seems that if standard procedure is for attending cops to tell unsupervised minors that their parents are dead then the system needs changing?

a reply to: grainofsand I do think typically a social worker would be called out to arrange care for the kids, but if this was a small rural town situation, then they may do things differently or maybe no one could be found to watch the kids. Who knows why things weren't done differently, but it sounds like the trooper tried to make the best of a bad situation for the kids, and that's what counts. The cop did not tell the kids the bad news, they waited for grandma to arrive the next day. But I'm sure the 13 year old knew something was up.

a reply to: grainofsand

Here going by procedure,the children would be taken into foster care while waiting for an "approved" adult to take custody.The social workers would tell the children what happened and why they were being held there. The adult in this case I believe was 2 days away from getting there or not until the next day. 'By that time the children would have already been informed of this,I can guarantee,that when the police pulled the kids out of the home and took them to the foster care system,the kids would be asking why.

originally posted by: eeyipes
it sounds like the trooper tried to make the best of a bad situation for the kids, and that's what counts.

Oh I agree absolutely, just looking at the wider picture here, if it is standard procedure for cops to tell unsupervised minors that their parents are dead then the system is in desperate need of changing.

This would not be a story in the UK because procedure is only to tell minors such things when there really is no other related adult with care, or trusted family friend who can pass the message.
It is not a choice for UK cops, they are required to withhold messages of death to minors until or unless there really is nobody outside of 'authority' to pass the message.

...and in case any other members think I'm being all superior here, I'm not, I'm just saying that UK cops are required to find a responsible adult with care before telling unsupervised minors, so they do not have to make that call.
If it is the case that US cops routinely break such news to unsupervised minors then I think the system should be changed, and yes if the system is that cold and blunt fisted then yes, those troopers did a good thing.

The cops should not have been in a position where they had to make the choice though, that tells me the system they are governed by is in desperate need of change.

This is truly sad and devastating for the children. As sweet and considerate as the police peoples intentions were, Halloween time just might always be a point of pain and sadness for the children, especially the older ones. Maybe Halloween for the little ones will be a normal memory, but children are more aware than given credit. I'm being a Debbie downer here, just relating to when one is given the news about when a loved one passes over.
For those that pray here on ATS, please pray for the tender hearts of the children. May they always know kindness and love.
The police people defiantly took into consideration the emotions of the tragedy and God bless them for that.
There are many good people in law enforcement and for that, I am grateful. The uniform doesn't stop a person from having a heart, just sometimes puts up barriers we can't see past.
Thank you OP for sharing this story as it only makes me want to pray and connect with the Divine.

a reply to: Dimithae

I really do not think it makes one bit of difference. Do you really think Halloween is ever going to have the same importance to these children? The cops did what they were supposed to do and there was nothing heroic about it. The news would be devastating either way and they should hear it from someone close to them.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

...which is why I question the policy of US police.
UK police policy is to find an appropriate adult and not tell kids their parents are dead.
It seems US policy needs changing if it is routine to tell unsupervised minors that their parents are dead. Shameful in my opinion.

a reply to: soulpowertothendegree

My opinion is that the police tried to do what they could for the kids to enjoy that last day.Kudos to them I say. In time,the kids will not only remember that that was the day they're parents died,but also the kindness shown to them by people who didn't have to care,yet did.

Pfft. I see no one whining about how the cop handled it bothered to actually click the link and read. The closest relative they found was the dad's mom, who lives 7 hours south in Florida. Considering she arrived at dawn, she probably sat in shock for a while, made other calls to relatives, possibly scrambled for gas funds, etc. Her time from call to arrival seems fine.

If reading CNN is too complex, try the GoFundMe page.
www.gofundme.com...

Sometimes doing the Right Thing is more than just "following standard procedure". If his higher ups approved of delaying contacting CPS, then it was legal. Deal with it, and be happy someone sought to provide a few hours of stability & comfort for the kids before raw reality hit them.

I don't know why I read stuff like this, I knew when I clicked on it that I would be reduced to tears.....

Hopefully positivity and great things find their way to that officer, and to those babies. Hopefully social services doesn't split the children up..

I'm the oldest of 4.... I'd be devastated if anyone tried to separate us. No 13 year old deserves to have this kind of weight on their chest, but if their family functions anything like mine then that 13 year old has a lot of responsibility on his shoulders now. (As the oldest it's always been my duty to take care of and look out for my siblings whenever our parents were absent, that's just how we work) It's not fair but neither is life. They shouldn't have been forced to grow up and see the harsh reality of the world so soon........





I can only hope that if something should happen to me.... that someone will be that considerate and loving of my child as to be as kind as considerate as possible.