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Are Multi-Partner Marriages Gonna Be a Thing?

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posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 11:53 AM
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i am not interested in discussing china's issues


as i said your here to discuss your own sexual desires ,as the source is about china .
edit on 4-11-2015 by stuthealien because: (no reason given)

edit on 4-11-2015 by stuthealien because: (no reason given)




posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:01 PM
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originally posted by: stuthealien

as i said your here to discuss your own sexual desires ,as the source is about china .


Maybe you can show me quotes where I commented on my personal preferences as opposed to discussing historical context.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:07 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

china's problem has nothing to do with historical content either,just because that is your major its not relevant in this issue.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:14 PM
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originally posted by: stuthealien
china's problem has nothing to do with historical content either,just because that is your major its not relevant in this issue.


It was relevant to the people I was conversing with. If you feel otherwise alert the moderators and report my posts.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:15 PM
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originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: LoneCloudHopper2


Marriage is a concept of two people, in love, who want to share their lives together. It is represented by a wedding ring, which symbolizes the two united as one, and their link to that special someone. If people would rather sleep around, or have different partners, well, I guess no one can stop stupid. But when it comes to marriage, sharing your life with someone, that is supposed to be sacred. The very concept of the wedding ring is a romantic notion. Romance is more than just sex, but love, togetherness, the very experience of sharing the little things in life together.


Will you marry me? I feel the same way! I can't see a man saying, "I love you" to a number of women. Kind of loses the meaning. ya know? It would creep me out to have a husband having sex with other women and telling them he loves them. Seems dishonest and not at all genuine and sincere.




First off, this discussion is about China's high male to female ratio. So the relationships wouldn't be about a man loving more than one woman, it would be about a group of men loving one woman. Second, about your example, a polyamorous relationship would require that you also loved the other woman that your husband loves equally to you. There would be a three way bond of trust. So, I think you are getting the wrong picture about how this is supposed to work. Though I wonder how it would work out in practice...



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:21 PM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

why would i report you,i guess your confusing me with a small minded individual,i embrace the chance for you to change my mind that this would indeed change china's problem,but you have not yet.
there will still not be any change in birthrates so its not a solution.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 12:25 PM
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originally posted by: stuthealien

why would i report you,i guess your confusing me with a small minded individual,i embrace the chance for you to change my mind that this would indeed change china's problem,but you have not yet.



Once again, since you must not be understanding what the conversation the other posters and I were having was about, it was not pertaining to China but to the historical implications of polygamy.


there will still not be any change in birthrates so its not a solution.


I am not interested in the birth rates of the Chinese population as my posts were not addressing that point.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 01:09 PM
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I screwed up this first post. Sorry, please see the next one *blush*
edit on 4-11-2015 by Fowlerstoad because: I totally screwd up how to reply .... ouch. *blush*



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 01:13 PM
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a reply to: ATODASO

Sorry I screwed that up the first go around ... I meant this post:

Sorry for a late reply, but I just had to express how you made me laugh some by saying this :


"but hey! also, i can't imagine any woman signing on for taking care of two grownass men. it only makes sense if it lightens the burden for all parties. "

That is totally hilarious, and to the point: men are more of a hassle to support if they cannot support themselves than women. Multiple men per woman, even more so hah. True dat!

It is totally hilarious to think of one woman with multiple men ... unless she is like superwoman or something, or maybe an Amazon of legend?

I would actually really enjoy hearing an Amazonian viewpoint on this. How would it work?



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 01:25 PM
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i hope this becomes a thing. i think that society will see how much more sense it makes then monogamy. as a female who has been involved in adult work i have always been attracted to the idea of polamory and extremely turned off by the idea of monogamy.

i think its due to the fact that i know first hand that most men will "cheat" and that it is due to biology.

i wish more women realized this and didnt limit themselves to seeking affection and reassurance from one man.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 07:58 PM
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originally posted by: Krazysh0t

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: LoneCloudHopper2


Marriage is a concept of two people, in love, who want to share their lives together. It is represented by a wedding ring, which symbolizes the two united as one, and their link to that special someone. If people would rather sleep around, or have different partners, well, I guess no one can stop stupid. But when it comes to marriage, sharing your life with someone, that is supposed to be sacred. The very concept of the wedding ring is a romantic notion. Romance is more than just sex, but love, togetherness, the very experience of sharing the little things in life together.


Will you marry me? I feel the same way! I can't see a man saying, "I love you" to a number of women. Kind of loses the meaning. ya know? It would creep me out to have a husband having sex with other women and telling them he loves them. Seems dishonest and not at all genuine and sincere.




First off, this discussion is about China's high male to female ratio. So the relationships wouldn't be about a man loving more than one woman, it would be about a group of men loving one woman. Second, about your example, a polyamorous relationship would require that you also loved the other woman that your husband loves equally to you. There would be a three way bond of trust. So, I think you are getting the wrong picture about how this is supposed to work. Though I wonder how it would work out in practice...


Um...no, there would be no 3 way bond of trust, because in my relationship there would be no sharing period! I love my best friends like Sisters, but I wouldn't want my Husband loving them as a wife. If I loved my husband's best friends or Brothers, then I and my husband would find that disrespectful and insincere and he wouldn't want me having them as husbands. There are different kinds and levels of love. In a marriage, it is supposed to be a bond of love,trust and loyalty between a couple who have chosen each other above all others. It is special and sacred. Multiple wives or husbands takes the meaning out of marriage. I don't care if others feel it is right and goes for that kind of life style, but It isn't for me and never will be.

I knew some Muslim women who hated the idea and worried about their husbands wanting another or a number of wives, but they would go along with it because they didn't want to lose their husbands. Doesn't sound very harmonious to me.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 08:24 PM
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originally posted by: NewzNose
a reply to: ATODASO

Deviation of the sanctity of marriage between one man an one woman has already begun. Someday in the future, maybe ok to wed your horse, you dog, etc. I know this sound ridiculous but so was same sex or polyamorous weddings 50 years ago.

I realize the bashing I will get from this but my point is valid and no one can guarantee it won't happen.



Actually, 50 years before that Mormons were practicing polygamy in the U.S.

I don't mean to bash you, at all, because I have found many of your comments lovely and thought-provoking, but the horse & dog scenario is a slippery slope logical fallacy.

That said, I know a few people who have tried polyamorous relationships -- *ahem* certainly not me in my late 20s, though
-- but I know of none who found them satisfying. Anecdotal, yes. And that's particularly rotten on my part after pointing out a logical fallacy.



posted on Nov, 4 2015 @ 11:36 PM
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Actually, 50 years before that Mormons were practicing polygamy in the U.S.
a reply to: MotherMayEye

Polygamy was practiced over 50 years ago but there was still the 1 legal wife rule, with other wives being outside of legal marriage. Could only be married to 1 person under the laws...even for (and I hate using this term) jack-mormons.

Your response was positive and nonbashing. I thank you.



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 12:10 AM
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This proposal was written in the blog of an economics professor and met largely with outrage.

It isn't going to be a thing any day soon. So let's not get in tizzy.

It seems there is more polyamoury happening outside of China currently, than in it.

stuthealien -

Besides being way off base in interjecting upon a discussion pertaining to historical context of polyandry and polygyny,

you are confused about the professors focus in his proposal - it was not put forth as a solution to the birth rates of females.

It was proposed as solution to the problem of men having care when old.

Under chinese law, children are obligated to support financially and physically, for their aging parents.

With so many men not able to marry or reproduce, they will not have anyone to support them when old.

The idea was that, if a woman has children, and several husbands, those husbands would all be taken care of by the children.



Now, the problem I would focus on in such a scenario is - how fair would that be to the child who is saddled with an aged mother and three aged dads to support and care for???



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 02:19 AM
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originally posted by: Bluesma
a reply to: LoneCloudHopper2

You've "proven" nothing.

My parents were a threesome for a while. They had group sex regularly. I walked in on some homosexual sex and my dad moved out for a while to live with two other homosexual men as an experiment. All this when I was under the age of eight and I knew everything as it happened.

Guess what? Kissed a girl and didn't feel anything. Never did it again.
Went to places of group sex, and had no inclination to join in.
A relationship of three just seems way too complicated for me- I have tons of other interests I'd rather put energy into.

Your "logic" is based upon your imagination, not experience.


ETA- it was the early '70's- they also smoked pot and dropped acid a lot. Guess what? I don't do drugs.
Kids most often achieve their sense of individuating from their parents by becoming the opposite of their parents.
That is why you have patterns of generational changes swinging back and forth.


How does any of this apply to what I said? Have you never been in a debate before?



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 02:24 AM
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a reply to: AugustusMasonicus

Yes, they are unrelated. I was making a point, not trying to tie them together...would you read "Moby Dick" and complain that Queequeg being a cannibal has nothing to do with whales?

Who's to say what isn't normal then? You?

I explained why it's a concern of mine, rather well I think. If you ever feel up to responding to my points, feel free to do so...
edit on 5-11-2015 by LoneCloudHopper2 because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 02:32 AM
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originally posted by: LoneCloudHopper2

How does any of this apply to what I said? Have you never been in a debate before?


It was a response to the concern about what children are exposed to, and escalation:




Multiple adults living together, and having sex together, is not a healthy environment for children to live in. As for why, there is such a thing as escalation.


My experience is extreme (most people involved in polyamoury keep their sex life hidden from the children, just as people who are monogamous do).
The open drug use is not so common either nowadays.

But even within this extreme case, both parents stopped taking drugs, they both stopped sexual experimentation. (and never got into pedophilia).
I did not go into these practices, even though I felt no outside source stopping from doing so if I wanted to.

This makes me think that individuals will be drawn to certain experiences, or not, whether it is legal or not.
Some people have addictive personalities and will tend to escalate whether it is legal or not.

Sometimes in a discussion, it is helpful to gain some understanding of where and how the other person developed their particular point of view.
It is helpful to me anyway, so I tend to reveal it in case they do too. It doesn't bring about agreement, but understanding is more important to me.

edit on 5-11-2015 by Bluesma because: (no reason given)



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 06:38 AM
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originally posted by: LoneCloudHopper2
Yes, they are unrelated. I was making a point, not trying to tie them together...would you read "Moby Dick" and complain that Queequeg being a cannibal has nothing to do with whales?



Huh? What does a fictional character have to do with real world issues?



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 06:52 AM
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a reply to: Night Star

Well that's just you. You aren't everyone. Try to think about things outside of your own perspectives for a change.



posted on Nov, 5 2015 @ 10:35 AM
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All I must say: as long as honesty is integral and present from the start of any potential romantic/marriage-possible multipartner relationship, then folks should be able to do as they may.

But ... without honesty, and clear expectations from the start, there will be trouble.

That works for couples just as truly.



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