Modern times finally caught up with me :(

I know - clickbaiting title.

However, I simply had to relate the following story to you.

A number of years back my wife and I were on the way to a wedding when me came across a stranded car at the roadside out in nowhere. Two people were there - a man and a woman - and we stopped to investigate. Turned out that they had just got married and the car they were driving were brand new and they had failed to notice that the sales place had only put enough fuel in the gar to get to the nearest service station. So now they were stranded. Needless to say (but I'll do it anyway) my wife and I towed the stranded car to the nearest service station, which happened to be back the way we came. We got a bit late to the wedding, but we helped the stranded copule.

Well that wasn't the story, but merely to lay the basis for the real story. Just so you know what my wife and I would ususally do.

Today I went to the builders market to get some stuff. As I exited our road onto the main road, I noticed a car - obviously stranded - and two people standing next to it, looking .... stranded.
A well I thought - they had mobile phones and one of them were on it.
So I carried on with my business.

Anyway - on the way back from the builder about half an hour later, I was thinking about the stranded car.

The two people were definitely of middle eastern descent and absolutely NOT of Danish descent. What if they were baiting people to stop? To rob them?
What if they genuinely were stranded? What if they were on the phone to tell someone that they weren't going to make whatever appointment they had?
What if they didn't have any friends close enough to be able to help them?

I was definitely in two minds and it made me feel rather akward. As mentioned, only a few years ago I wouldn't have hesitated.

But I decided in the end, that no matter what, when I got to the same spot, I'd stop and ask if they needed help. Even tow their car to the service station if that was what was needed. And if the car had broken down beyond moving, then I'd help them out by driving them to the train station.

But do you know what REALLY made me uncomfortable?

When I got to the spot, the car had gone and to my shame I thought: "Well that was lucky".

a reply to: HolgerTheDane2

The constant media bombardment with the threat of terror is getting out of hand in my opinion and your story goes some way to confirming this.

Last Sunday evening I was stood outside my front door smoking a cigarette when a car pulled up and 4 indian guys jumped out and started walking towards me.

I actually panicked and looked around for something to grab in case I needed to protect myself. Then my neighbour(also Indian) came out of his house greeted the guys and said to me in his third generation local accent "Hi there, can't stop to chat or we'll be late for church!"

I felt pretty stupid afterwards, all this talk of muslim fundementalists actually had me worrried about some christians going to church because of the colour of there skin

I am a bit more fool hardy. When i broke down i just flagged car down, asked to borrow his phone to ring the rescue service. I wouldnt hesitate doing that.

But maybe its different because i am a woman, and 1) they may think tnat i am useless with my car 2) more vulnerable because ov my sex therefore less of a threat.

I wouldn't hesitate to ask someone if they needed help, but i have nothing to take. Crappy 16 beaten u
car, £10 phone. No credit cards. A mugger would be very disappointed by his efforts.

I'd have felt lucky, too- the problem simply solved itself, and now you no longer feel obligated to help.
I appreciate that there are other people out there who tend to stop and check on the road-side folk.

a reply to: HolgerTheDane2

When I got to the spot, the car had gone and to my shame I thought: "Well that was lucky".

I wouldn't be ashamed if I were you - and I'm always stopping to help people. Survival is our most basic instinct. You have all the right in the world to feel like you did,
regardless of the fact that you noticed that they had the ability to call for help. It is difficult to trust anyone these days.

Ease up on yourself, friend.

a reply to: HolgerTheDane2

I think the mobile phone/digital media age has a big influence in this, it has caused a disconnect between face to face 'strangers' over the last couple of decades.

Different situation, but back in the early 90's it was common to lose your friends on a night out in bars and clubs, so with very few people owning mobile phones, unless you had an agreed route of the pub crawl you could have a hard time finding your group again.

It wasn't a problem though as after a few seconds chuckle with a stranger that you had lost your mates it was common to be warmly invited into a new group of people. It happened to me loads of times and I met some great random people over the years.

These days you'd be looked at as weird or suspicious for not just calling your friends.

Another example, say waiting at a bus or train station, people used to smile and talk to each other, but now nearly everybody is looking down at screens instead.
It seems to me that the more we immerse ourselves into the digital world then the less we wish, or need, to interact with face to face strangers.

I may be overly dramatic here but it does trouble me about how the future generations might interact with each other outside of their digital bubbles. Will those small talk, and introductory communication skills born of the years of human society be thought of as the quaint non-digital world?
I hope not.

a reply to: HolgerTheDane2
The over hyped media has caused this dichotomy. When at one time, the thought that middle eastern people at the side of the road were attempting a crime would never have crossed your mind, now it does. It's sad, since most people were not raised this way or would normally think this way. In any case, it is not your fault.

Earlier this year, maybe it was last year, I was at the local gas station/party store when a van load of middle eastern types pulled up. They seemed like they were from India, but their clothing and accent was more like Pakistani, anyway they asked for directions to the local dam. So I told them it was just a half mile down the road. I had seen these type of guys down there once before that season, but that was the only time I'd even seen middle eastern types around here. I thought about it a little later and felt that they didn't seem like any kind of threat, but if they were, I could have cared less if they blew the dam up, it's close to 100 years old and needs to be replaced IMO.

Anyway, if modern times have finally caught up with you, just wait until post modern times hit you. We've been in the post modern era since the late 1950's. I learned about post modernism in the 80's and that was a real mind screw for me then. Personally, although I was born after the modern period, I'm nostalgic for that period now. You should get with the times, I suspect that the post modern period is about over with now that were are in the 21st century.

A few years ago while living in the Provo, Utah area, I had a restaurant business. It required I purchase food items from local companies, as well as using a food delivery service as most restaurants do. One morning I got off the beaten path looking for a vendor. At the time,today's smart portable phones, (which I still do not own) were just becoming popular, containing among a zillion other apps, business locators. So, I did what most people did back in the day (2009) if they were lost. I stopped to ASK directions! (Only me...lol.) Arriving on a cul-de-sac in an industrial area, I parked outside what looked like a brick and block contractor's type business and went inside! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Though I was standing in an informal reception area, my eyes riveted to a hallway on the left with mid-eastern people diving all directions due to my innocent and unexpected interruption! There was a hallway with a conference room with a view window. On the window, facing out into the hallway, (not into the conference room), was a picture of the then Iatolla Kumaime! (forgive phonetic spelling)
The problem with the poster? The probable reason for the exodus? Real bullet holes that had been shot through the forehead of the Kumaime, as well as other bullet holes in the glass! OK THEN! Having raised five children, and having learned to keep my "cool" in emergency situations, (until any real danger has passed-then fall apart), my "cool" was necessitated to meet the "cool" of the "one" mid-eastern man, instantly standing in front of me! HE asked ME what I was in need of! (which is why I was there, IDIOT!) Of course I was redirected by him and gladly turned on my heels, exited the warehouse, jumped in my vehicle and sped away! My point? The subject of "helping others"...what exactly is that defined to be?!!! I suppose he was merciful to me and did not "end" me for fear of blowing their cover! So he was VERY helpful! We all have our own motives, just saying....