I believe that sexuality is not a choice and most sexuals were 'born that way'.
But that premarital sex, and heck, teen or even sadly, pre-teen sex is almost always an express 'choice' opted in for, nowadays.
Since its just my belief, I don't need any scientific nor religious basis. I rather base it on my first hand experience.
I'm an asexual female. My personal experience comes from relationships I've had with a few heterosexuals over the past couple decades. I'm up front
about my asexuality. I explain to all friends who enquire that I never had sex and never will, because I have no interest in ut. The few I ended up in
relationships with, were of course only the ones that convinced me at least at first that they were okay with being intimate friends with no physical
intimacy yet no emotional nor physical cheating while going 'steady' . Suffice it to say, these relationships with heterosexuals didnt last long,
because they kept wanting sex despite our having already outlined the limitations of our relationship.
My first said a physical connection was missing and that he met someone else who wanted to be with him physically so we agreed to end our
relationship. The second turned out to be a very good actress and I found out I was just being used for the loving affection she was missing in her
secret physical flings with a married man. The third was loyal and a gentle, non-sexual giant until he lost alot of weight (like 100lbs) and suddenly
aroused all the time, became very physically agressive, and on the morning I awoke to him attempting to rape me, I sustained alot of physical injuries
and suffice it to say, we parted ways instantly despite the emotional attachment at the hip.
That was several years ago, and since then I realized I was not alone but that only 1 in 100 persons or fewer are asexual, so I joined a forum for
asexuals and went to a meet up and ended up spending the past 6 years to present in companionship with an asexual male. We are considering having a
kid or two, but no, we haven't tried yet and he's not sure he will physically be able to because although some mornings he does have the physical
readiness, he says that's only because he has to go pee. But that's a non-issue to me, because we could always use AI or maybe a turkey baster.
Assuming we are both fertile, and in any case I don't see a need for everyone or even the majority to reproduce; I find it selfish as the world is
already full of unwanted and starving kids galore (thaaat's the next generation?!).
I'd suggest that around 90-95% people are born heterosexual. Granted, theres the occasional male who is possibly born homosexual due to developmental
factors since all embryos/fetuses start off 'female' (unless he just decided at some point in life he somehow prefers the company of the same sex
organ he has already), or asexual like my hubby, but yea I'm convinced the vast majority of people are born hetero. Theres alot of hetero men
who've confided in me that their first experimental sexual relationships were with peer homosexual males, but that they were just experimenting with
whoever was available and never considered themselves homosexual even during those practice acts of sexual release with homosexuals. I've never so
far had any woman admit to me that her first sexual relationships were with the same sex, although I've had some women share with me that they have
always been an are still bisexual.
I admire the few heterosexuals who entertained an asexual relationship with me, but from those few relationships I conclude that heterosexuals
generally cannot turn off their sexual urges permanently, because eventually they resurface especially between the sometimes fine lines of
unconditional love and romantic love. To me, the perfect valentines day is a walk on the beach after brunch, a swim together past the surf all day
till we get hungry as heck, and then a big dinner feast and falling asleep in each others arms giggling and laughing all the way. To sexuals, their
happy ending is a bit different and well, its not their choice their brains seem to not be content until a physical intimate release whether with
company or solo.
Thus, I believe sexuals should focus on the substance of what they are aside from their... sex/gender and their sexuality. What I see in these times
is many of the majority sexuality considering themselves the 'norm' and the 'golden standard' and basing who they 'fall in love with' and
'marry' based on the prime qualifier being whether its an inny or outy between their soulmate's legs. (Are we not all equally human beings?) And
yet so much divorce/separation nevertheless - whether heterosexual or homosexual unions - meanwhile conservative 'straights' protect the
'sanctity' of marriage and liberal 'queers' finally enjoy the chance of officially recognized unions. On that note, I expect to see better quality
of relationships, lest individuals who obsess over what sex can love another, are going to blame the other sexuality for ruining their marriage
Speaking of which, adultery laws have been abolished across most/all of the states only in recent decades/years and yet I don't see heterosexuals or
anyone for the matter fighting for the right to protect the sanctity of marriage along THOSE lines, but rather, simply what sex/gender can marry
Thus I call for this widespread acceptance as 'choices' of premarital sex, promiscuity, and serial infidelity from one marriage to divorce to the
next be investigated lest sexuals continue to exhibit through behavior that they were born that way - to not be monogamous - in which case sexuals'
right to marry should be questioned more thoroughly than the current policies in place: where most any adult couple can show up at the local county
clerk and get married unless they're married elsewhere or refuse a mandatory STD test- which i find kind of insulting because it implies an
acceptance of premarital sex, but only a few states and DC require them so far, no?