It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

So what did the Bison say to his kid when he left for college?

page: 2
9
<< 1    3 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 11:46 AM
link   
Two atoms are sitting in a bar.
One says, "OMG! I've lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you positive?"




posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 12:32 PM
link   
a reply to: N3k9Ni

The bartender says, "you do look a little unstable".



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 01:10 PM
link   
a reply to: greencmp

One ion says to the other ion, "don't be so negative all the time. Look at me, I'm always positive".



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 01:24 PM
link   
When God told the animals to go forth and multiply, a pair of snakes rose up to protest.
"Please sir", they complained, "We can't multiply. We're adders".

But God had an answer to everything.
He told them to use logs.

(Thank you Mr.Makin, our Maths teacher)



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 01:49 PM
link   
A guy walks into a bar with a pair of jumper cables.
The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't try to start anything."
edit on 9/19/2015 by N3k9Ni because: typo



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 02:10 PM
link   
a reply to: N3k9Ni

"is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?"



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 02:25 PM
link   
a reply to: greencmp

Nice to find someone that appreciates my humor.



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 02:56 PM
link   
a reply to: N3k9Ni

Entropy isn’t what it used to be.




posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 04:19 PM
link   
a reply to: greencmp

I'm indifferent about apathy.



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 08:57 PM
link   
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those that can count and those that can't.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

I named my band 999 Megabytes. We are still looking for a gig.



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 09:18 PM
link   
a reply to: N3k9Ni

I have mixed feelings about ambivalence.



posted on Sep, 19 2015 @ 11:51 PM
link   
a reply to: ColeYounger

Well, I can resist anything but temptation. So there.



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 12:22 AM
link   
Helium walks into a bar.
The bartender says "Didn't you see the sign on the door? We do not serve noble gases"
Argon did not react.



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 05:10 AM
link   
Snowman says to snowman
I smell carrots



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 05:18 AM
link   
Nostalgia - it's not what it used to be..



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 08:58 AM
link   
That's the trouble with setting up libraries in the African jungle.
People have to read between the lions.



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 09:12 AM
link   
a reply to: muse7

i love animal jokes....here's mine....

a giraffe walks into a bar
the bartender asks "hey buddy you want a long neck?"
the giraffe replies "i didn't know i had a choice"



posted on Sep, 20 2015 @ 01:18 PM
link   
a reply to: N3k9Ni

"A mugger just practices freelance politics."

"Politicians are wonderful people, so long as they don't meddle in things
they don't understand -- such as working for a living."

-P.J. O'Rourke



posted on Sep, 22 2015 @ 09:35 AM
link   
A Seal walks into a club



posted on Oct, 29 2015 @ 07:28 PM
link   
i used to be indecisive, but now, i'm not so sure.

i'd be more lethargic if i weren't so apathetic.

what's the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? mechanical engineers build weapons, civil engineers build targets.

what's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?
f.

the bartender says, "i'm sorry we don’t serve time travelers in here.”
a time traveler walks into a bar.



new topics

top topics



 
9
<< 1    3 >>

log in

join