The woe of laughter

Listen to this tale of woe,
it will not bring laughter.
Who are you to teach,
when you are the one chased after.

So my first comes a plead,
to not get wretched thereafter.
For it will not bring peace,
when you arent willing, to listen to your master.

My second comes a curse,
you hear the, little, little rustle.
Could it be your cattle?
Cause you are in for a big hustle!

If you cannot see a plead,
then you will see a misdeed.
It will be but a stampede,
when you wont let them be freed.

So what ya guys think? Getting better?

a reply to: yulka

Doesn't thrill me like some of your others. I am not in a position to advise (education is poor) but feel that the use of simpler english might help express your thoughts better. For example.

First comes a plead
Don't get sad thereafter
For sadness brings no peace
When you ignore your master.

a reply to: glend

damnit, gonna go and study some more

a reply to: yulka

Not so much study Yulka, your mind is amazing, just need to express thought into words correctly. One of my favourite poems is invictus which expresses light within the darkness.

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul