a reply to: NaughtyLibrarian
Well, for what it's worth I can describe some of my own experiences and some theories I've drawn from them.
I've been an insomniac my whole life. I was born with RH disease. I think it's possible I suffered miner brain damage as a consequence; that could
explain some things. Often while lying awake at night I'd drift into a calm pleasant state of mind. I didn't think of it as being between asleep and
awake, but perhaps that's appropriate. As the brain shifts from awake to asleep it can leave parts of your mind awake. In that case you could go into
REM, or have a nightmare while being awake (nightmare means night demon. It originally referred to sleep paralysis). Once in a while I'd see things
early in the night before falling asleep; like a hand reaching up next to my bed, or a portal opening with the shadowy figure of a werewolf behind it.
I'd freeze from fear. I didn't try to move. Once (I think this was early in the morning) I was lying in the calm state and pulled my blanket over my
head without thinking (a normal thing for me to do). It was a blue blanket, but after I covered myself with it it burned read, like coals in a fire
(it looked that way, but it felt normal). I panicked and sat up and started pulling the rest of the blanket over my head trying to get out from the
end that covered my feet. I felt like it was taking a very long time, but looking back now it probably just seemed that way because of the fear.
Before I got out, an ugly mask with sharp teeth flew in front of my face (it seemed like I could see it through the blanket). I froze. Before I could
do anything else, everything faded back to normal. I then pulled the last piece of the blanket off and I was free. My family told me it was all just
dreams. But I knew what dreams were. These certainly weren't dreams. My older brother told me that even though I was awake the dreams were still in my
head. I'd never heard of such a thing and it sounded ridiculous to me. And if I couldn't trust my own eyes, what could I trust? At the time I
interpreted all those things as demons. I thought when the blanket turned red the 'mask' was trying to trap me in its dimension. The experience
stopped for years until I became a teenager.
As a teenager the experiences were more frequent and more intense than any other time in my life (I'd go through it on a semi-weekly basis). The
terror during these episodes was incredible, way beyond any fear I've experienced from the rest of my life; and no matter how I struggled to move, I
couldn't. But when I came out of it, the fear just melted away. It's a weird feeling, hard to describe. Sort of like coming from freezing cold into a
warm comfortable home. Also at this time; my sleep-cycle was completely screwed up. No longer did I just stay in bed at night and stay awake in the
day; I woke up and went to bed at seemingly random intervals. The hallucinations as a teenager were of aliens. In one instance I woke up seeing a very
tall gray alien at the foot of my bed. It wasn't a classic Gray, it looked like it was out of a low budget sy-fy from the fifties. It wore a cape with
an elaborate collar that stuck up over its head. It was like I could feel evil radiating from it. I tried asking "who are you?", but nothing would
come out but heavy breathing. I tried with all my might to kick it, but my leg only twitched. Then everything faded back to normal and I got out of
bed. In another instance I saw a large green light come down outside my window. I felt myself sliding toward the foot of my bed. I actually felt the
friction as I dragged down. I heard the sheets rubbing against me. I saw the parallax effect from the motion. Nothing seemed at all like an illusion.
After calling to god for help in a silent prayer, the light faded from green, to yellow, to orange, to red, and it floated up and away. Everything was
normal once again. I barely fit in my bed then. My head was at the top, and my feet were at the bottom. If I moved anywhere near as far as it seemed,
my feet would have been sticking a few feet over the end of the bed. That was enough to convince me I couldn't even trust my eyes. Whether awake or in
dreams, our brain creates everything we experience. I think most of what we experience while awake is based on the 'real' world, but it's still a
construct of the brain. So we can never truly know or experience the real world.
The experience was absent for years in my early adult life; until one night I awoke to see a lightening bolt come down from the light bulb in the
middle of my room. There was a weird light and I could sense, but not see a UFO flying around outside. I knew what was happening (hypnogogia) and I
wanted to get away. I struggled with all my might to turn my head. I noticed my breathing intensified as if I were exerting myself, but my muscles
were relaxed. When I managed to turn my head everything returned to normal. There was nothing left to get away from. I didn't feel hungry or anything,
so I just went back to sleep. It's happened every few years since then. Once I saw a big ugly rat come and start chewing on the back of my hand (I
wasn't laying on my back this time). I pulled myself out of it and went back to sleep (no marks were left from the rat bites when I awoke). There's
still some mild fear when it happens, but nothing near what I felt as a teenager. I've learned to get out of it by moving. Just a theory: in addition
to your muscles being inhibited, I think your brain's inverse kinematic system is also down. In other words: you'll find it impossible to perform
actions requiring the subconscious coordination of various muscles. If you focus on flexing a specific muscle you may have more luck.
I've had other experiences; usually hearing music when I wake up. I've seen hallucinations when waking up at times without the fear (a long time ago).
I've had my eyes open while dreaming before I woke up (the transition from dream to wake is odd and disorienting in that circumstance).
Not sure any of this means anything to you, but it's been nice talking.