posted on Aug, 20 2015 @ 09:47 AM
As various factions of our society have felt the need to profess their feelings of victimhood and make demands of certain avenues of exceptional
freedom be allowed their kind, so too, should those that bear the burden of the trait of so-called manspreading. This trait of maleness must be given
recognition and its due not just in popular culture, but to be fully embraced by the rule of law within every aspect of our civilization. Thus, a
Constitutional law is surely mandated.
The raising of male voices over this issue should not be discounted as merely another display of a subtle display of typical male aggression. No. It
is every bit as legitimate that those that want special features, favors, arrangements and considerations for their perceived needs. Manspreading is
not a social issue. It has its roots in the very depths of the male anatomy, the core of humanity itself, some would say.
Manspreading is nothing less than Nature reacting as Nature must to further the continuation of the species. In plain words, manspeading is a
natural act even if it makes some people uncomfortable that a man on a subway may sit with his knees far apart and appears as if he cares not for his
fellow passengers with his need to use precious extra inches. (Do overweight people not act the same?) Some jealousy extremist of other causes would
say that manspreading is really a form of display to attract attention to a man’s genitals in an unseemly fashion even if he is fully clothed in
that region. (Do men complain if a woman sits with her legs spread regardless of what she is wearing?)
A brief almost scientific study was recently done within the last few minutes and determined that this sudden rush to condemn men across the board for
being merely men has determined that there is a solitary reason for recent shouts of criminal manspreading. Recently, across the
internet—internetspreading, if you will—was a video of a couple on a transit vehicle where a guy had artificially endowed himself. His girlfriend
secretly videoed women sitting across from him, sneaking glances at his clothed but bulging crotch. Scientists believe that it was this solitary
video that was seized upon as the primary evidence that manspreading was a social practice that needed to be stamped out before it spread like
A more recent scientific study done on the basis of the above almost scientific study found that the claims of manspreading are spurious and totally
unwarranted, much like claims about women showing too much thigh or cleavage.
In addition, if not more importantly, the furtheration of the species depends exactly upon that feature remaining as an entirely normal and whimsical
male attribute. The “family jewels,” as they are sometimes called, require a precise operating temperature to maintain their full functionality.
So for any one aspect of society to demand that manspreading be eliminated would be a real kick in the nuts for humanity shortly down the road.