I walked through the crowd.

It was a rainy day by the sea side where I live so all the tourists were out shopping in town, a very big crowd of strangers. I had left home in a cheerful mood, but as I meandered through the people, such a feeling of alienation came over me it was quite shocking. This is a fairly frequent experience I have.

My mind is not working the same. I am on a completely different vibe and the gulf is growing wider still. I know there are many people here at ATS who must get this same feeling.

There seems to be a vast majority of people who have accepted and continue to accept a kind of programming. It is media and peer generated and these people get enough out of it, or so they believe, to continue to squeeze and restrict their perception for the material benefits and lifestyles they have.

"We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight
Ask himself if it’s him or them that’s really insane",

says Bob Dylan in his "Visions of Johanna" song. I get your point Bob Dylan.

I think there are people in numbers who seem to have been encouraged or encourage themselves to step out of the crowd. These people suffer for it, too. I am suffering for it, yet the suffering is priceless compared to the imprisonment of the crowd.

I used to see so many people expressing themselves individually. So much that I did not regard the crowd as a horde. The crowd looked like a promising healthy collage. So quickly some oppressive force has bled all the colour from this panorama. They are practically wearing casual uniforms.

The sixties generation gave me hope. For all their sins there was a huge social and cultural revolution let loose in the West. How quickly that was "dealt with" and contained. Yet there survives in little flowering corners some who are visionary and already embarked on experiments that will blossom and bare fruit and those colours will bedazzle in contrast.

I care deeply about this crowd who are being bled of their colour and identity for the sake of a lifestyle that will soon be unsustainable, that is all set up so precisely with the "high purpose" (sarcasm on) of wealth extraction to launch just a tiny minority to the top of the pyramid. Do you not realise to launch yourselves that high it will mean destroying the pyramid? I am not sure anything can now prevent the woes of the future, where the locusts, having eaten up all the crops, die of hunger in the arid desert of their own making. Mean while I expect Icarus will get burned by the same Sun, just a little higher in altitude.

In honour of every unique individual who understands this. It is not you who are mad, but the world around you.

(If I have offended any way, please forgive, but I had a need to write this).

a reply to: Revolution9

I have often felt isolated or alienated, and I did not always feel that way. I had a really good time with all my friends in my younger years, then I got into highschool.... I just didn't vibe with the majority. Then college came, and I found myself not even attempting to make new friends, and certainly not going out of my way to meet new people. I even found that I would rather sit by myself in the back row and quietly study or do my work rather than make friends and become part of the mindless obnoxious chit chat about nothing.

Now i'm 24, I have a 6 month old son, and for the last 2 years, my few friends come to me. I don't even bother leaving my house any more unless I need to go on a supply run.

I'm just hoping my child doesn't end up anti social like me.

-Alee

a reply to: NerdGoddess

I hope your unique experience leads you and your child to green pastures. Just know it is not your fault. There are some of us who were bound to go this way because our minds/souls cannot make the sacrifice of what we lose perceptually and value the freedom of thought and imagination without the chains of conformity.

Agents of change, a natural phenomenon? Definitely. Something gained at such a cost, undoubtedly.

"Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy. Don't bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality. Wake Up and Live!" Bob Marley

a reply to: Revolution9

The sixties generation gave me hope. For all their sins there was a huge social and cultural revolution let loose in the West. How quickly that was "dealt with" and contained. Yet there survives in little flowering corners some who are visionary and already embarked on experiments that will blossom and bare fruit and those colours will bedazzle in contrast.

I don't know anything about the sixties brother, since I turned 18 in 2001 and am technically apart of the Millennium generation. But I've spent a fair bit of time in Nimbin and have come to the conclusion that the hippies are just as delusional as everyone else... Bunch of child molesting drug addicts, if I was being completely honest! No answers or higher form of being to be found there... believe me.

What we need is a new kind of revolution, totally independent & unique of anything that's ever come before it.

Believe it or not, most people want to be ignorant. A poll taken on any street, would show many have no real idea of what's going on in the world and how it will effect them. They want to live their happy little lives, in their happy little towns and do their everyday happy little things and be blind to the rest of it. If you show someone how truly crooked things really are, the politician who only cares about power and money, the corporation that knows it's product is killing the planet and doesn't care as long as the money keeps rolling in, a treaty that will give the Elite more power than ever, then they have to start questioning themselves, asking "What can I do about it", "What will I do about it" and they realize there is nothing they can do, so they are left knowing that their happy little lives are just a mirage.
The man who said "Ignorance is bliss" was exactly right.

1- we live in a an incredible time for self expression. Just a take a look at all the art projects that are probably going on in your city

2- We all feel isolated sometimes. You are in no way special in that respect. Everyone feels the same thing. But you suck it up and move foraward and hopefully tomorrow you will feel better.

a reply to: Subaeruginosa

But I've spent a fair bit of time in Nimbin and have come to the conclusion that the hippies are just as delusional as everyone else... Bunch of child molesting drug addicts, if I was being completely honest! No answers or higher form of being to be found there... believe me.

What we need is a new kind of revolution, totally independent & unique of anything that's ever come before it.

Haters gonna hate.

a reply to: Subaeruginosa

But I've spent a fair bit of time in Nimbin and have come to the conclusion that the hippies are just as delusional as everyone else... Bunch of child molesting drug addicts, if I was being completely honest! No answers or higher form of being to be found there... believe me.

What we need is a new kind of revolution, totally independent & unique of anything that's ever come before it.

Haters gonna hate.

originally posted by: 3danimator2014
1- we live in a an incredible time for self expression. Just a take a look at all the art projects that are probably going on in your city

2- We all feel isolated sometimes. You are in no way special in that respect. Everyone feels the same thing. But you suck it up and move foraward and hopefully tomorrow you will feel better.

Everyone is special. I did not wish to portray myself as special. I predicted there would be this response. I bothered to write this as a comfort to those who get these feelings. Remember I did mention the "flowering little corners".

I did feel better the moment I decided to walk the walk of my difficult life. So much bullying, misunderstanding, pressure to conform, mistreatment and inability to conform has led to me opting out to the maximum of my ability. Unfortunately, I am now too poor to have the opportunity to express myself in terms of lifestyle.

You seem to want to believe that people like me don't exist, that we should sleep on it and that will make it better. Do you not see that there are many people who are having problems of interaction because they find their way of being is at odds with the society in which they live?

Also, is it not a real issue that most people block out anything and everything that may disturb the balance of a life that is too superficial for some of us to lead?

I have suggested that the life most our leading, the consumer lifestyle that is a very modern invention, is responsible for draining us of diversity, originality down to even our rights.

The behaviour I see in my own society is too narrow for me to actually function in. I am the one who has to suffer for that and suffer I do. They don't even know I exist, lol. Yet I can't change the way my mind works to "fit in". I tried very hard for many years, but it did not work. In the past, before the control came in I was able to function. Once that happened I was doomed. You may not be able to relate to this, but there are some who will because they have had similar experiences.

This is my experience of modern society. It is not everyone's as I clearly stated. Society will not accommodate me. In work I got quickly singled out. In education I could not abide the restrictions placed upon me in terms of subject matter and how I was expected to perceive it. I gave up doing a degree in English Literature because of utter disillusionment at the constraints.

What really sticks with me is the horror. I see all too clearly what people have done and are still doing to each other. I will not feel better about that, not tomorrow, next year or the year after that.

Read too many books, thought too many thoughts, I don't know, but the pattern that is emerging before my eyes is very grim. The suit is too small and I can't fit in to it.

See how this world works? All that disagrees with the mass identity ends up on the impoverished margins.

"Out here on the perimeters there are no stars
Out here, we is stoned...immaculate".

Bob and Jim think it is real. So do I.

I've asked that question of the Driver of the Blue Bus,

"Driver where you taking us"?

Ain't no going back once you ask questions like that. Better be prepared to sail a vast ocean on a drunken boat.

(I've dropped all sorts of references in there that a few might pick up on).

ps. The only art projects going on in my town are mainstream. Like I said, dwindling imagination.

a reply to: Revolution9

You may need to see a psychiatrist. I see TONS of people all the time expressing their individuality. Or, you may just be getting old. There's always that too... How do you feel about dubstep? Have you even heard of it?

originally posted by: NerdGoddess
a reply to: Revolution9

I have often felt isolated or alienated, and I did not always feel that way. I had a really good time with all my friends in my younger years, then I got into highschool.... I just didn't vibe with the majority. Then college came, and I found myself not even attempting to make new friends, and certainly not going out of my way to meet new people. I even found that I would rather sit by myself in the back row and quietly study or do my work rather than make friends and become part of the mindless obnoxious chit chat about nothing.

Now i'm 24, I have a 6 month old son, and for the last 2 years, my few friends come to me. I don't even bother leaving my house any more unless I need to go on a supply run.

I'm just hoping my child doesn't end up anti social like me.

-Alee

I wonder if you have any idea how many people are having exactly the same experience you are and are living just like you are. A young lady friend of mine, wife and mother of 2 explained it to me this way: "I'm avoiding the "creep factor" and the pointless static which I find so distracting and negative". She has to go to an office job each day, but she avoids contact with the "others" to the extent that she can. One day she told me..."there are so many psychic vampires out there."

originally posted by: Revolution9

originally posted by: 3danimator2014
1- we live in a an incredible time for self expression. Just a take a look at all the art projects that are probably going on in your city

2- We all feel isolated sometimes. You are in no way special in that respect. Everyone feels the same thing. But you suck it up and move foraward and hopefully tomorrow you will feel better.

Everyone is special. I did not wish to portray myself as special. I predicted there would be this response. I bothered to write this as a comfort to those who get these feelings. Remember I did mention the "flowering little corners".

I did feel better the moment I decided to walk the walk of my difficult life. So much bullying, misunderstanding, pressure to conform, mistreatment and inability to conform has led to me opting out to the maximum of my ability. Unfortunately, I am now too poor to have the opportunity to express myself in terms of lifestyle.

You seem to want to believe that people like me don't exist, that we should sleep on it and that will make it better. Do you not see that there are many people who are having problems of interaction because they find their way of being is at odds with the society in which they live?

Also, is it not a real issue that most people block out anything and everything that may disturb the balance of a life that is too superficial for some of us to lead?

I have suggested that the life most our leading, the consumer lifestyle that is a very modern invention, is responsible for draining us of diversity, originality down to even our rights.

The behaviour I see in my own society is too narrow for me to actually function in. I am the one who has to suffer for that and suffer I do. They don't even know I exist, lol. Yet I can't change the way my mind works to "fit in". I tried very hard for many years, but it did not work. In the past, before the control came in I was able to function. Once that happened I was doomed. You may not be able to relate to this, but there are some who will because they have had similar experiences.

This is my experience of modern society. It is not everyone's as I clearly stated. Society will not accommodate me. In work I got quickly singled out. In education I could not abide the restrictions placed upon me in terms of subject matter and how I was expected to perceive it. I gave up doing a degree in English Literature because of utter disillusionment at the constraints.

What really sticks with me is the horror. I see all too clearly what people have done and are still doing to each other. I will not feel better about that, not tomorrow, next year or the year after that.

Read too many books, thought too many thoughts, I don't know, but the pattern that is emerging before my eyes is very grim. The suit is too small and I can't fit in to it.

See how this world works? All that disagrees with the mass identity ends up on the impoverished margins.

"Out here on the perimeters there are no stars
Out here, we is stoned...immaculate".

Bob and Jim think it is real. So do I.

I've asked that question of the Driver of the Blue Bus,

"Driver where you taking us"?

Ain't no going back once you ask questions like that. Better be prepared to sail a vast ocean on a drunken boat.

(I've dropped all sorts of references in there that a few might pick up on).

ps. The only art projects going on in my town are mainstream. Like I said, dwindling imagination.

Oh please....quit being a martyr and reading volumes into everything everyone is saying. Its so boring.
I never said people are not special and i certainly never said that people like you dont exist.

I'm saying that the fact that you sometimes feel isolated isnt anything that is special to you. I feel like that sometimes, so does EVERY SINGLE PERSON. We all get sad, we all get isolated, we all cry, we all sit, depressed and think of things we shouldnt sometimes. But you have to nudge yourself out of it and get on with your life. You only have one and you are wasting it buddy.

And FYI, insulting the population by saying no one is expressing themselves or whetever it is you said originally doesnt help. People are doing great, original things every single day all over the world. Its a shame you are wallowing in so much self pity that you refuse to see it. The world is good and happy, come join us!

Clearly you want someone to fawn all over you and hold your hand in this thread. That person isnt me. So, good luck.

originally posted by: Krazysh0t
a reply to: Revolution9

You may need to see a psychiatrist. I see TONS of people all the time expressing their individuality. Or, you may just be getting old. There's always that too... How do you feel about dubstep? Have you even heard of it?

What!? What has dubstep got to do with getting old?

a reply to: Subaeruginosa

But I've spent a fair bit of time in Nimbin and have come to the conclusion that the hippies are just as delusional as everyone else... Bunch of child molesting drug addicts, if I was being completely honest! No answers or higher form of being to be found there… believe me.

Bite your tongue. They helped get endless war in Vietnam to end, they helped expose tricky dick, the last generation to try and block the tunnel this country is plunging down now…

At least they resisted. Got up, got outside and actually stood together in protest.

a reply to: TonyS

Yeah for sure. I mean, I don't feel depressed about not being the social butterfly I used to be, it just feels right for me to keep to myself, and do my own thing, which sometimes ends in feeling alienated or lonely, but it is of my own choosing.

-Alee

There are two types of people; those who's senses allow for (unfortunately not capable of) an infinite awareness. Those people tend to be less detail oriented, but able to more clearly see the "big picture". Then you have those who view the world from inside their personal bubble. That bubble can make it difficult to see the happenings outside of it. Therefore, the majority of their thought and energy is spent only on that which exists inside that bubble. I would also say that those "bubble" people are more likely to be closed-minded and have a level of OCD.

From what I can tell there are far more "bubble" type people than not. Which explains the feelings of alienation.



for the record; I am not a professional, but I DID sleep at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

originally posted by: Subaeruginosa
a reply to: Revolution9

The sixties generation gave me hope. For all their sins there was a huge social and cultural revolution let loose in the West. How quickly that was "dealt with" and contained. Yet there survives in little flowering corners some who are visionary and already embarked on experiments that will blossom and bare fruit and those colours will bedazzle in contrast.

I don't know anything about the sixties brother, since I turned 18 in 2001 and am technically apart of the Millennium generation. But I've spent a fair bit of time in Nimbin and have come to the conclusion that the hippies are just as delusional as everyone else... Bunch of child molesting drug addicts, if I was being completely honest! No answers or higher form of being to be found there... believe me.

What we need is a new kind of revolution, totally independent & unique of anything that's ever come before it.

Yea, that is why I said for all its sins. There was an element of that. Yet some amazing expanses of human perception occurred.

If you look back in history drugs have always been used to expand perception. We know of all the tribal people that used hallucinogens, etc and we know that poets of the modern age, like Samuel Taylor Coleridge used them a(and there is a huge list of artists of all kinds who are arguably the most ground breaking and original). Check out Aldous Huxley. It is only bad if you think it is bad. People have died trying to do this, but they die in other occupations, too. It takes bravery and courage to step out into the unknown. It is a place full of horror, fear and uncertainty with no one to guide or restrict you.

Of course there is the other way, of unconsciously following the mass vision, yet you will be used in that capacity as a resource and a unit.

It pleases me to be myself as long as I can do it. In the next few years my life is going to get worse than it is now as I am cornered even further. I'm being slowly phased out of existence. I wish it was not like that, but to live as I do is on the losing side.

The Native Americans are an example of this. On the Reservations this is happening. They are different. They follow their own tradition and vision. They are squeezed into seemingly ever dwindling pockets out of an inability and unwillingness to conform to that which opposes and denies their identity. They suffer! Yes, there are drug and alcohol problems because as we know these are great PAIN killers. Notice how some visionary people in art, literature and music who have suffered the same problems.

The lot of a misfit. Do not blame the misfit as if they are just being stubborn, bigoted, vain or as if they have power to change who they are. It is not possible. They have to be who we are.

originally posted by: nonjudgementalist

originally posted by: Krazysh0t
a reply to: Revolution9

You may need to see a psychiatrist. I see TONS of people all the time expressing their individuality. Or, you may just be getting old. There's always that too... How do you feel about dubstep? Have you even heard of it?

What!? What has dubstep got to do with getting old?

I had to explain to my 60 year old father what dubstep was.

originally posted by: Firewater
There are two types of people; those who's senses allow for (unfortunately not capable of) an infinite awareness. Those people tend to be less detail oriented, but able to more clearly see the "big picture". Then you have those who view the world from inside their personal bubble. That bubble can make it difficult to see the happenings outside of it. Therefore, the majority of their thought and energy is spent only on that which exists inside that bubble. I would also say that those "bubble" people are more likely to be closed-minded and have a level of OCD.

From what I can tell there are far more "bubble" type people than not. Which explains the feelings of alienation.



for the record; I am not a professional, but I DID sleep at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

Yes, these bubble people are in the vast majority. Yet notice that the bubble people are the ones who are far easier to control. We have a problem, Houston. Controlled they are and they appear to give consent be it conscious, semi or unconscious. Driver where you taking them?