a reply to: network dude
No worries, I'll be happy to answer to the best of my understanding.
Sorry in advance for being so long winded.
Each town is different. Since my condition became disabling back in 1998, I have traveled to and lived in several different cities and towns. Each
town has what I describe as a different operating protocol. That's just my military brat and creative self talking in a comfortable voice there, not
a deep hard line belief system.
Ever since I got into the system back in 98 I have felt more "tuned in" to things that operate behind the scenes in various regions and locales. Most
is benign, but there was a new dynamic element I became aware of that I can't quite describe yet. Almost like various sub-levels underneath the
public face of a city or region. A governance system of all the varied social classes.
When I started behaving irrationally because of my condition, it's almost as if a new element took notice of me. Most of the time it's gentle and
helpful, and very nice and pleasant to deal with. Sometimes it's very frightening. I've had to go into inpatient several times when things get out
of hand, and there is an unusually high occurrence of other individuals in treatment with stories that parallel or correlate with the types of mental
malfunctions and thematic paranoia or delusions that I myself was going through.
Of course, everyone has their own unique variation of events, seeing as how we're all dealing with different home environments and social groups,
but....when you're someone like me who love puzzles, riddles, enigmas and connecting dots....eventually you begin to notice certain patterns.
The majority of folks in inpatient (not all of them) are there for a combination of drug use and/or mental instability. You frequently hear stories
about harassment - usually from neighbors or the local law enforcement. Some claim there are conspiracies going on within the local ruling classes,
and while I do not wish to discredit what these people believe, I can't help but think their behavior somewhat contributes to the turmoil they go
Now, I bring this up because I am a pretty boring person. Most people think of people with Schizo-various diagnose are violent, irrational and
dangerous individuals. I'm not. I love people and all things gentle and kind, and fight the delusions as best I can when they arise. I know fully
well they are not logical, but it's overwhelming trying to maintain a rational and logical perspective when such states hit. After a while, you begin
to notice when things are gearing up for a manic or delusional break. It's like a slow descent. With proper medication and therapy, one can learn
how to overcome and master certain things so they don't get out of hand and end up in a $9000 week stay in the hospital drinking Kool-aid and playing
Now.....what does any of that have to do with V2S/DEW/GS?
The latter occur when I am not experiencing any aspects or manifestations of my illness. I'm not sleep deprived or in a manic episode or depressed.
I'm not seeing visuals or having unusual thoughts at all. The GS aspect just hits out of the blue without cause or provocation, and it's a radically
different experience than the illness I have been living with for twenty years now.
I have been sitting at my computer working on something and all of a sudden I get a blinding white-light headache, and it feels like it comes from
somewhere outside. So naturally, I get up and look out the window and yup - sure enough - there are strange vehicles parked outside. I've seen
everything from black tinted windows to run down beaters. Most of the vehicles are stock white low end models. And the frequency signatures of the
attacks are pretty identifiable once you get used to the feeling of being hit with those types of "attention getters".
I know this sounds weird, but I have stood in my kitchen window when those vehicles are out there and had all sorts of mental conversations with some
of them. They're not all bad. Heck, I've even mooned one guy who I suspected was CIA. I've flipped the bird and cussed some of them out. I've also
chided them for abuse of the technology. Hell, wouldn't surprise me one iota if some of the lower-end schematics for these types of devices were
available somewhere on the Dark Web. Dunno. I'm not really interested in swimming in those waters to find out firsthand, but knowing human beings it
wouldn't surprise me on iota if the diagrams were out there.
I've also been in highly populated areas and felt being hit, and when I look in the direction of the attack, sure enough some ass-hat is pointing a
cell phone camera right at me almost as if they want visual evidence of my reaction to the pulses. Other times, they're small pocket deterrents that
scared people employ to get rid of and keep "undesirables" at bay. Almost like those high frequency emitters they use to ward off mice in warehouses
and so forth.
Now here's where the high weirdness comes in.
The most painful and debilitating attacks of DEW I ever experienced did not come from what I would describe as a ground level origin. They came from
ABOVE somewhere. So what? Crazy weapons in space? There wasn't any air traffic that I could hear those days. So what am I supposed to think?
Aliens and UFO's with human experimentation plans?
That last part sounds crazy, but sadly....after one mental attack right before a therapy session I swear on my life I saw something in the sky that
looked like a silver spaceship out of a sci-fi flick. Close range and low altitude too. High weirdness that day but I won't bore you any further
with irrelevant details.
You know.....those of us on the schizo-spectrum all report the same "delusions" so there can't be any damned truth to any of it, right? Nah. It's
just "chemicals" going awry. Yeah. That's it. Brain chemistry and too many movies.
Wow. Talk about a great cover, guys.
They thought of every contingency.
Honestly, part of me is damned impressed with that.
edit on 8/15/15 by GENERAL EYES because: grammatical edits