posted on Jul, 13 2015 @ 09:05 AM
I'm going camping with the grandkids. And after reading repeated threads on this site I realize my life is in danger by stepping outside the door .
I'm going camping in a state park for instance and almost paralyzed with fear because of all the missing people in the parks annually . But fear not
ATS, I will keep my eyes open for Bigfoot, aliens abducting campers, dimensional riffs into which I can disappear into, PETA activists in suicide
vest out to kill people bothering animals , sunspots, earthquakes, overexposure to the deadly thermal radiation released by the sun, mosquito
transmitted illnesses like aids, West Nile virus, . We will be far too well armed in the event of a Isis attack . We are taking the dogs with us out
of fear of a racially motivated beat down for telling someone to pull up their pants .
And I've instructed my family that if we are approached by police or game wardens to drop to the ground in a spreadeagled position And only reply
with yes sir no sir .
All of our toxic tents made of plastic and nylon have been traded in for regular old canvas it's heavier but I don't want to die from toxic
poisoning before I get out of the woods . Because children are involved I've elected to take nothing but tofu and rice because God knows I don't want
anyone eating other stuff and being happy .
I hope I've got everything covered but before I leave I ask my friends on ATS . Have I forgotten any of the life threatening dangers from stepping
outside the door ?
edit on 13-7-2015 by Greathouse because: (no reason given)