It looks like you're using an Ad Blocker.

Please white-list or disable AboveTopSecret.com in your ad-blocking tool.

Thank you.

 

Some features of ATS will be disabled while you continue to use an ad-blocker.

 

At Age 3 — Transitioning From Jack To Jackie

page: 13
28
<< 10  11  12    14  15  16 >>

log in

join
share:

posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:04 PM
link   
Parents on the way so if anyone wants to chat with them they'll be here soon.




posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:09 PM
link   

originally posted by: EKron

originally posted by: JadeStar
So like, my parents tried to nurture me to be a boy but I always knew I was a girl. That would seem to nullify a nurture hypothesis, at least in my case, wouldn't it?


I completely agree. I was just trying to sus out Anaana's comments to see where she was coming from.

Like you, I am not of the belief that anyone or anything made me this way and that I'm not a product of my environment or social conditioning.


Exactly. It would seem that hypothesis is on weak ground.


Although I was given much programming and encouragement to be and act like a boy, there's no doubt and I won't deny I had a lot of contradictory nurture as well so one on must ask, what came first, the chicken or the egg? Who I was inside, and still am BTW, didn't match up so well with the outside but I know my mother and grandmother at least sensed part of the inside me, maybe even on a subconscious level, or I would never have been able to do some of the things I did or was exposed to that most boys weren't. All the signals I got were never mixed and loudly clear - be and act like a boy but at the same time, more often than not I was treated and allowed to do things more to my true my inner self and nature.


So they wanted you to live some kind of "dual life"? That is a lot to ask of someone.



Ultimately, as I did not grow up to be a man, my exposure or nurture if you will, to things traditionally reserved for girls worked out pretty well. Did it make me this way? No. It was the other way around. Whatever nurture I did get was because of my nature in spite of the outside package.


Well said.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:19 PM
link   
(I am Tamara, Jade's Mom)

Hello again. Brian and I are here. If you have any questions for either of us let us know. We will be here for a few hours. Right now we'll look and see if we missed any questions or comments.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:32 PM
link   

originally posted by: EKron

originally posted by: Darth_Prime
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian

Always and forever..

i only wish i had this much support my life


Brings a tear to the eye, don't it Darth? I know you've had rough times and been through hell that makes my little slice of misery in the past look like key lime pie. It is hard not to be a little envious when you see this great loving, communicating family that actually works. Makes you go wow!


(Tamara here, Jades mom)

Well we're not exactly "Leave it to Beaver" but we do our best to keep the lines of communication open and that's really help us resolve a lot of problems. Jade is one of four children and as anyone with children knows, all kids have different challenges. In a way the other three prepared us for when Jade was born.



Jade's wit, knowledge, attitude and wisdom in things that far exceed her years and the way she writes and thinks reached out and grabbed and impressed me right away without even adding any of the other stuff. Now after getting to see the magic of their family dynamic in action, you can where she gets it from because they're all kickass folks.


That warms my heart hearing that about our child. We did the best we could and know we could have done better in hindsight but we are very happy with her.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:34 PM
link   

originally posted by: BuzzyWigs
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian

Thanks to both of you, Tamara and Brian.

JadeStar is a wonderful girl. I have told her that, too.
Well done, both of you!!!



Thank You.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 08:53 PM
link   

originally posted by: babybunnies
Sorry, but at THREE, you don't have an original thought.

This is totally parent driven, not parent approved.


(Brian here, Jade's Dad)

If I had not had the experience of dealing with a transgender child I would have thought the same as you do. However you should know that there have been recent studies into children like Jade and it turns out that children that age can certainly express that they are the gender opposite of their body.

I would recommend you read this study: Transgender kids show consistent gender identity across measures


A study with 32 transgender children, ages 5 to 12, indicates that the gender identity of these children is deeply held and is not the result of confusion about gender identity or pretense. The study, led by psychological scientist Kristina Olson of the University of Washington, is one of the first to explore gender identity in transgender children using implicit measures that operate outside conscious awareness and are, therefore, less susceptible to modification than self-report measures.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:09 PM
link   

originally posted by: BELIEVERpriest
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian
Hello,
I understand that you wanted to speak with me. I do have a question for you. As a devout Christian, how do you justify supporting you're son's pursuit self feminization?


(Brian again, Jade's Dad)

I will for a moment assume that you are referring to Jade and not her older brother. First of all she is our daughter and always has been. It just took us some time to understand that. I am not sure how much of our story you read but as my wife said, even before Jade was born she exhibited more behaviors in common with my other daughters.

That did not stop when she was born. As I said, she always had a kind of quiet, gentleness about her and that has continued through adulthood.

As a devout Christian, the good book teaches us that judgement is reserved for God. My wife who is even more devout than I will certainly have something to say here but I would just refer you to the Serenity Prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

We had the wisdom to know the difference. Jade as she will tell you was experiencing what she described to us as "a living hell" until we gained the wisdom from medical professionals and Jade herself, to know that the best course was to let Jade be who she naturally was.

Jade was always feminine, regardless of her anatomy at the time of birth. God delivered her to us that way for reasons we do not know but we are very proud that we were able to help her escape the living hell she felt and helped her become a happy young woman with a bright future ahead of her.

I highly doubt that if you met Jade you'd even think of referring to her as our son. She's our daughter and we love her.
edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:16 PM
link   

originally posted by: JadeStarSo they wanted you to live some kind of "dual life"? That is a lot to ask of someone.

Oh no, it was perfectly clear what they wanted me to be and how I was expected to act and was hounded to be like a boys but on the other hand, was allowed to play with dolls and dress up and such when young. After I was 8, was allowed to grow out my hair and my parents threatened to sue the school when they were trying to make me cut it. I made quilts and stuff and even in high school, did needlepoint and embroidery and knew all the different stitches and had my own hoops. I still have them in fact as well as one of the dolls I had when I was 6 or 7 that I kept all these years. I loved to bake and cook and was Suzy homemaker and although there was more to it, the running joke I heard several times a week was "you're going to make somebody a good wife one of these days".

I guess if there was any "dual life" it wasn't because I wasn't a girl on the outside? Yes, I was bombarded to be more like and be interested in more boy things and was pushed and encouraged in that direction constantly. My parents didn't want me to be teased or have a difficult life or maybe my behavior just embarrassed them, I don't know but had I been rigidly not allowed to do some of the things I did or the way I was at home, life would not have been survivable. Like I said when I was a small child, concessions were made for my behavior. I don't know how that happened.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:25 PM
link   

originally posted by: TamaraAndBrian

originally posted by: BELIEVERpriest
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian
Hello,
I understand that you wanted to speak with me. I do have a question for you. As a devout Christian, how do you justify supporting you're son's pursuit self feminization?


(Brian again, Jade's Dad)

I will for a moment assume that you are referring to Jade and not her older brother. First of all she is our daughter and always has been. It just took us some time to understand that. I am not sure how much of our story you read but as my wife said, even before Jade was born she exhibited more behaviors in common with my other daughters.

That did not stop when she was born. As I said, she always had a kind of quiet, gentleness about her and that has continued through adulthood.

As a devout Christian, the good book teaches us that judgement is reserved for God. My wife who is even more devout than I will certainly have something to say here but I would just refer you to the Serenity Prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

We had the wisdom to know the difference. Jade as she will tell you was experiencing what she described to us as "a living hell" until we gained the wisdom from medical professionals and Jade herself, to know that the best course was to let Jade be who she naturally was.

Jade was always feminine, regardless of her anatomy at the time of birth. God delivered her to us that way for reasons we do not know but we are very proud that we were able to help her escape the living hell she felt and helped her become a happy young woman with a bright future ahead of her.

I highly doubt that if you met Jade you'd even think of referring to her as our son. She's our daughter and we love her.


Dad, you sooooiooo rock! :hearts:



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:39 PM
link   

originally posted by: EKron

originally posted by: JadeStarSo they wanted you to live some kind of "dual life"? That is a lot to ask of someone.

Oh no, it was perfectly clear what they wanted me to be and how I was expected to act and was hounded to be like a boys but on the other hand, was allowed to play with dolls and dress up and such when young. After I was 8, was allowed to grow out my hair and my parents threatened to sue the school when they were trying to make me cut it. I made quilts and stuff and even in high school, did needlepoint and embroidery and knew all the different stitches and had my own hoops. I still have them in fact as well as one of the dolls I had when I was 6 or 7 that I kept all these years. I loved to bake and cook and was Suzy homemaker and although there was more to it, the running joke I heard several times a week was "you're going to make somebody a good wife one of these days".


It sounds to me like what you said: your mom just was waiting for you to tell her. I find it hard to believe that she didn't know. Like my mom says "Moms know." I love how she said she knew even before I was born.


I guess if there was any "dual life" it wasn't because I wasn't a girl on the outside?


Yes, that's what I mean.


Yes, I was bombarded to be more like and be interested in more boy things and was pushed and encouraged in that direction constantly. My parents didn't want me to be teased or have a difficult life or maybe my behavior just embarrassed them,


Probably both. That's what was the case with my parents.


I don't know but had I been rigidly not allowed to do some of the things I did or the way I was at home, life would not have been survivable. Like I said when I was a small child, concessions were made for my behavior. I don't know how that happened.


We'll be happy that they were
your story really illustrates the pain that transgender kids go through when not completely accepted.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:50 PM
link   

originally posted by: BELIEVERpriest
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian
Hello,
I understand that you wanted to speak with me. I do have a question for you. As a devout Christian, how do you justify supporting you're son's pursuit self feminization?


(This is Tamara again)

Oh no you didn't!

Look, as my husband told you. Jade our DAUGHTER has always been a girl. It just took us some time to accept that. We helped her be who she is today starting when she was 7 years old.

How do I justify that? I justify that by one simple thing: I would rather have 4 happy children than 3. Now you go on and think about that for a moment. Because really that is what I was faced with. Trying to force Jade to be something she at her very soul is not, was killing her.

Jade once drew this picture of our house with the faces of Brian and I, and Jade's 2 sisters and older brother in the windows.

Where was Jade you might ask?

She drew a cross in our yard.

So, how about you read Matthew 7:1 and really take it to heart.

Anyone have any other questions?



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 09:52 PM
link   

originally posted by: TamaraAndBrian

originally posted by: BELIEVERpriest
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian
Hello,
I understand that you wanted to speak with me. I do have a question for you. As a devout Christian, how do you justify supporting you're son's pursuit self feminization?


(This is Tamara again)

Oh no you didn't!

Look, as my husband told you. Jade our DAUGHTER has always been a girl. It just took us some time to accept that. We helped her be who she is today starting when she was 7 years old.

How do I justify that? I justify that by one simple thing: I would rather have 4 happy children than 3. Now you go on and think about that for a moment. Because really that is what I was faced with. Trying to force Jade to be something she at her very soul is not, was killing her.

Jade once drew this picture of our house with the faces of Brian and I, and Jade's 2 sisters and older brother in the windows.

Where was Jade you might ask?

She drew a cross in our yard.

So, how about you read Matthew 7:1 and really take it to heart.

Anyone have any other questions?


You go, Mom!!!!!

edit on 9-7-2015 by JadeStar because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 10:18 PM
link   
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian

Well, I'm willing to bet that a genetic test will prove that you have a son, but whatever.

If you read the same bible I read, then you would know that God doesn't make mistakes. People are born male, female or eunuchs. Men are prohibited from acting and dressing feminine and women are prohibited from acting and dressing masculine.

You're right, its not my place to judge, so I will discontinue this conversation, but I don't get your logic.
edit on 9-7-2015 by BELIEVERpriest because: typo



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 10:19 PM
link   

originally posted by: JadeStar
It sounds to me like what you said: your mom just was waiting for you to tell her. I find it hard to believe that she didn't know. Like my mom says "Moms know."


In retrospect, I wish I would have been able to say "mom, I DO want to make somebody a good wife one of these days". Yeah, I'm sure my mom knew. How could she not? Her lack of surprise when I came out to her and her saying she always knew who I was inside leaves little doubt. FWIW, I was a good wife for the 11 years I was married.

There's a certain age or level of maturity when the relationship and communication between parents and adult children changes, maybe it isn't even until your children have children and realize their parents weren't so stupid after all that this happens? On this subject, I was never far enough away from it to talk about it with my mother who died when I was 25 like I could now if she was still around. Sure would have been nice to have some of the gaps in things I don't remember or understand filled in.



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 10:43 PM
link   

originally posted by: BELIEVERpriest
a reply to: TamaraAndBrian

Well, I'm willing to bet that a genetic test will prove that you have a son, but whatever.


(Brian here)

I could counter that I am willing to bet that a brain scan will prove we have a daughter. Not that we need a scan to know that. We have spent 20 years with her. Anyone who spends 5 minutes with her would agree.

But if you need scientific justification, odd that you would considering you're a man of faith here goes:

In the 1990s, scientists began to compare sexually dimorphic regions in the brains of transsexuals and the rest of humanity. Early work in this area required the examination of brains postmortem; recent studies use images of the living brain.

The results show that when individuals of Sex A—despite having the chromosomes, gonads and sex hormones of that sex—insist that they're really Sex B, the gender-affected parts of the brain typically more closely resemble what's usually seen with Sex B.

Ref: Transsexual differences caught on brain scan



If you read the same bible I read, then you would know that God doesn't make mistakes.


To use your reasoning we should never try to ease the suffering of people born with other medical conditions either. Since God doesn't make mistakes and everything is perfect we should not treat any disease either for they were put here by God.


By the way, tell me this, who is to judge whether Jade and our experience raising her is a mistake? You? Or God?

If you read the same Bible I read you should know the answer is not you. She was put here for a reason and we helped her live and thrive presumably following the will of God because would you have rather she killed herself as a child?

That isn't very Pro-Life.



People are born male, female or eunuchs. Men are prohibited from acting and dressing feminine and women are prohibited from acting and dressing masculine.


I would refer you to Galatians: 3:28 then.

People are conceived and embryos are female until a certain point at which a certain series of events masculinize them later during the pregnancy. It is thought that this process is not always 100% and this is where people who are intersexed (hermaphrodites) or transsexual or transgender people come from.

They're just as much children of God as you or I. They're just a bit more rare than you or I.

I think you need to learn to embrace the full diversity of God's creations rather than exclude some of them because they are not to your liking.



Your right, its not my place to judge, so I will discontinue this conversation, but I don't get your logic.


My logic is that you seem to miss the full spirit of the good book, while at the same time rejecting valid scientific evidence contrary to your narrow world view. What can I do with that?
edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)

edit on 9-7-2015 by TamaraAndBrian because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 9 2015 @ 11:07 PM
link   

originally posted by: EKron

originally posted by: JadeStar
It sounds to me like what you said: your mom just was waiting for you to tell her. I find it hard to believe that she didn't know. Like my mom says "Moms know."


In retrospect, I wish I would have been able to say "mom, I DO want to make somebody a good wife one of these days".


*hug*

How do you think she would have responded?


Yeah, I'm sure my mom knew. How could she not? Her lack of surprise when I came out to her and her saying she always knew who I was inside leaves little doubt. FWIW, I was a good wife for the 11 years I was married.


Well there ya go! She'd probably have been proud of you



There's a certain age or level of maturity when the relationship and communication between parents and adult children changes, maybe it isn't even until your children have children and realize their parents weren't so stupid after all that this happens?


I don't know. I have friends who say their mom is like their best friend but that was not the dynamic with my mom. She made it very clear to all of us that she was our mother and while we could talk with her about anything we knew our roles as children.


On this subject, I was never far enough away from it to talk about it with my mother who died when I was 25 like I could now if she was still around. Sure would have been nice to have some of the gaps in things I don't remember or understand filled in.


You mean like the "IQ" tests?
In my case they didn't even try to hide the intent of the testing I was given. I was told vaguely that it was part of a study of kids like me.



posted on Jul, 10 2015 @ 12:33 AM
link   

originally posted by: JadeStar

How do you think she would have responded?


That's a good question. As I posted somewhere, she told me this funny haha joke/teasing was supposedly a hint I failed to pick up on and she was trying to open the door to talk about it. I wish now I had especially in my senior year of hs when I was looking much less like a boy and more of an it (or with my hair at the time, Cousin It). But you know, after hearing all my life about how I needed to be more like other boys, I felt it would be such a huge disappointment to her if I spoke up. In 72-73, I'm not sure what could have been done about it anyway? Probably just more IQ testing.


Well there ya go! She'd probably have been proud of you


Yeah, she would have been. I'm sure of that. I know she was proud to see me with her granddaughter. Even my real dad, who I haven't talked about much and who wasn't too sure what to think about me met my husband a few times and got along with him really well - they talked about cars. I sensed he was kinda proud? I think he might have just have been happier to see me settled down and stable though? He wasn't a talker.


I don't know. I have friends who say their mom is like their best friend but that was not the dynamic with my mom. She made it very clear to all of us that she was our mother and while we could talk with her about anything we knew our roles as children.


I hear what you're saying. My daughter and I were very close and open but I was the parent and she understood that. We had our share of battles and not quite to the same degree, but somewhat also the same argumentative communication style I had with my mom. I don't know when it was but I had the realization at some point I had grown up and become my mother. With my daughter in her forties now, she's talking about how she has realized she's grown up and turned into me. We had quite a laugh about it. Other than liking hockey (I'm not a sports fan) and being a black belt in tae kwan do (she rocks!), we are so much alike in so many ways it's almost scary. She even looks like me (poor kid!)


You mean like the "IQ" tests?
In my case they didn't even try to hide the intent of the testing I was given. I was told vaguely that it was part of a study of kids like me.


Exactly. There's plenty more too but it's all kind of water under the bridge at this point.



posted on Jul, 10 2015 @ 01:58 AM
link   

originally posted by: EKron

originally posted by: JadeStar

How do you think she would have responded?


That's a good question. As I posted somewhere, she told me this funny haha joke/teasing was supposedly a hint I failed to pick up on and she was trying to open the door to talk about it. I wish now I had especially in my senior year of hs


You know, I was just sent a U2U by another ATS member who is currently in the same situation you were (albeit older than you were then). And so I told her that she should tell her mom. It's not like her mom doesn't know. Her mom caught her wearing dresses and stuff however, her mom is also very anti-LGBT. I told her that she should just open up to her mom because a) she probably already knows and b) people sometimes modify their views on things when it involves a family member. She is in my area of the country so I hooked her up with some local organizations and resources which I hope help her.


But you know, after hearing all my life about how I needed to be more like other boys, I felt it would be such a huge disappointment to her if I spoke up. In 72-73, I'm not sure what could have been done about it anyway? Probably just more IQ testing.


I guess? Well I hope your story is a cautionary tale. I don't feel any of us should have to hide who we are from our families and I also know that if I had been able to, I would probably be in a much worse situation if I was alive at all (which I doubt I would be.)




Well there ya go! She'd probably have been proud of you


Yeah, she would have been. I'm sure of that. I know she was proud to see me with her granddaughter. Even my real dad, who I haven't talked about much and who wasn't too sure what to think about me met my husband a few times and got along with him really well


That's wonderful!
You must have been ecstatic that they got along!



- they talked about cars.


As guys do.... hehe. My dad does with my boyfriend and they get along really well. My dad was kind of suspicious of him when he first came over.

I mean here's this 6ft tall emo hair guy with tatoos and stuff and my dad is Mr. clean cut Navy dude. So yeah I didn't think they would mesh at all!! But my boyfriend is a good man and so is my dad and I think they recognized that in each other and they had something in common in their love of cars, specially classic cars! It's incredible, like at holidays when he comes over like recently when we had a 4th of July barbecue they sat and talked for HOURS about classic cars!




I sensed he was kinda proud? I think he might have just have been happier to see me settled down and stable though? He wasn't a talker.


Yes. That makes sense considering everything you've told me about the wild 1970s.




I don't know. I have friends who say their mom is like their best friend but that was not the dynamic with my mom. She made it very clear to all of us that she was our mother and while we could talk with her about anything we knew our roles as children.


I hear what you're saying. My daughter and I were very close and open but I was the parent and she understood that. We had our share of battles and not quite to the same degree, but somewhat also the same argumentative communication style I had with my mom.


You've become your mom!





I don't know when it was but I had the realization at some point I had grown up and become my mother. With my daughter in her forties now, she's talking about how she has realized she's grown up and turned into me.


I guess that will happen to me too then?

I remember having one of those "argue-scussions" with my mom when I was like 15 or 16 I forget but I was getting ready to go to a Paramore concert with my bf and some friends and she didn't like how I was dressed, thought my skirt was too short (as if), didn't like my fishnets, didn't like the goth style stuff I wore in general back then, etc, etc. We must have had one of those argue type discussions for like an hour and we both made compromises (ie: i changed to just black tights and she let me wear the same skirt).

So I guess this is how I will be if and when I raise a daughter? We all become our mothers? I can kinda see where that could happen.


We had quite a laugh about it. Other than liking hockey (I'm not a sports fan) and being a black belt in tae kwan do (she rocks!), we are so much alike in so many ways it's almost scary. She even looks like me (poor kid!)


Awwww that's cute! And i've seen you, don't be so hard on your self. You look fine. Kinda like a school teacher I once had.


You mean like the "IQ" tests?
In my case they didn't even try to hide the intent of the testing I was given. I was told vaguely that it was part of a study of kids like me.


Exactly. There's plenty more too but it's all kind of water under the bridge at this point.


Yeah pretty much. I would like to know which study or studies my test results were a part of though. Just so I can look up the relevant papers, assuming they were published.

I mean that stuff was a major thing which happened in our childhood so I'm curious what became of it.

edit on 10-7-2015 by JadeStar because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 10 2015 @ 05:15 AM
link   

originally posted by: JadeStar
I remember having one of those "argue-scussions" with my mom when I was like 15 or 16 I forget but I was getting ready to go to a Paramore concert with my bf and some friends and she didn't like how I was dressed, thought my skirt was too short (as if), didn't like my fishnets, didn't like the goth style stuff I wore in general back then, etc, etc. We must have had one of those argue type discussions for like an hour and we both made compromises (ie: i changed to just black tights and she let me wear the same skirt).

So I guess this is how I will be if and when I raise a daughter? We all become our mothers? I can kinda see where that could happen.


"argue-cussions! Yes, exactly and the goth thing. In high school got I so sick of black every single day it seemed. I kept expecting her to come from school with a note asking if we were undertakers or ran a funeral home and she dyed her butt length hair jet black until she was in her 30's. She was in band though so I do have some pictures of her in uniform and even one in a white blouse and I did manage to get her in a nice dress for prom. They're rarities.

And yes, I think it's an unwritten rule somewhere raising a children automatically makes you turn into your mother, then when they have kids you get to spoil them and let 'em get away with stuff. My grandson is coming over this weekend and staying a week and will be properly spoiled when I take him back home.

So, I'm talked out, hard to believe but true but am open for any questions about anything anyone would like to ask and I would hope someone please does. I've pretty much laid my whole life and psyche out here for public examination but I think anyone reading this deep into this thread should get an idea what life was like a long time ago and what life is like in more current times for people like Jade and myself and it can only get better.

It should also be crystal clear how the love, support and understanding of family and early help in a young person's life with these struggles can have such remarkable outcomes. Jade and her parents, Brian and Tamara, and their willingness to be open and share their lives and stories to bring some information and awareness of kids born different is something I think anyone reading this can't help but be moved and inspired by. I know I've been and finding a young person of kindred spirit and similar but very different experience and circumstance that's been able to overcome these matters with a clear and unfettered future ahead of her has been touching and uplifting. Thank you Jade, for being a friend. Meeting you has meant a lot to me.

Thanks to those that have hung in here with us for all of this. It's been interesting, cathartic and at times difficult reminiscing about things from my childhood, teen and early adult years but I feel it has been worth it to show the contrast of the eras and the importance of communication and openness between parents and their children.

I'm still here but it's time to hear more from someone else.
edit on Fri Jul 10th 2015 by EKron because: (no reason given)



posted on Jul, 10 2015 @ 07:50 AM
link   
I haven't read through this entire thread (I tried, but by page 4 I was so nauseated and disgusted I had to skip to the end.)

Tamara and Brian did EXACTLY the right thing, and the results are obvious.

To all of you saying children are too young to know, or that they are too stupid to have their own ideas, I would like to smack each and every one of you.

I am considered an expert in parenting, child development, brain-training, and all the issues that go into it.
I have been asked to speak at conferences and inservices, I have taken 'train the trainer' courses in ALL aspects of parenting, and I am telling you all now that you are a bunch of know-nothings shooting your mouths off about things YOU DO NOT KNOW.

It makes me absolutely sick to know how many inept people out there think that when they have a child it is up to THEM to create that child's identity. You don't. Your JOB is to pay attention, LEARN your child, WATCH your child, and answer their questions. Introduce them to new things as their curiosity and interest shows.

THEY ARE PEOPLE. You all make me so angry I can hardly see straight.
SHUT UP!!! You are wrong, ignorant, simple-minded, judgmental FOOLS - and you wonder why society is so messed up.
From what I've read the MAJORITY of you have NO BUSINESS being parents.




Disgraceful.

@Tamara and Brian - KUDOS to you, not only for the tremendous job you did and are continuing to do parenting your DAUGHTER, but for the efforts you put in to do your very best.

Many of the respondents on this thread just like to shoot their mouths off at every opportunity. Ignore them, if you can; and if you can't, LET THEM HAVE IT!! They don't have any idea what they're talking about, and for them to come on here and try to shame YOU is appalling. It shows such courage, such investment that you came on here at all - such dignity and PARENTING. I would have done the same thing had my child asked. (As they get older, of course, a parent has to not intervene unless asked, which has been hard for me - my two are 24 and 26 now.)

@JadeStar - never forget how much your parents love you. Appreciate that, and know that you are better off than MILLIONS of young people ever had a hope to be.

Unfortunately, MOST parents have very little idea how to manage BEING a parent. You were born to exactly the right people. A successful family is something to be honored, held up as a shining beacon, and not ONE of these members exclaiming their righteousness deserves any attention at all, except to be investigated by CPS for their utter FAILURE to understand and access the plethora of research, science, and knowledge of how individuals grow and learn.

These people are the reason I believe that EVERY PERSON who becomes pregnant or is thinking of becoming pregnant should be LICENSED and have to go through a battery of CLASSES to clear up their ignorance and prepare them for the HARDEST JOB in the world.



edit on 7/10/2015 by BuzzyWigs because: (no reason given)



new topics

top topics



 
28
<< 10  11  12    14  15  16 >>

log in

join