Serious Question: Why are so Many People Afraid/Unaccepting of Transgender People?

Ok...

I do take some issue with this.

Let me say firstly, I do not think transgender people are perverts, criminals, sick or anything negative that may go with it.

If you want to go from Joseph to Josephine go for it, I will not think less of you.

However.

I have a friend who went from male to female and we had lots of heated debates on this, in my view you were assigned a male body because you were male, I do not believe that gender identity goes beyond your physical being as such I cannot believe that you were assigned the wrong gender. Like it or not you are still a male, you have a X and Y chromosome just like me, and through surgery you have only changed the appearance of your body but you are still under it all a dude.

I personally believe that it is a psychiatric condition and that having gender reassignment is the wrong way to go, its unnatural, nature did not intend for you to have breasts and pee sitting down. At some point, I believe early on in your life, you developed a psychiatric condition that caused to you believe you were the wrong gender and that you started to make changes to your lifestyle and eventually your body to reflect this.

Not a popular view I know.

But its mine and I am entitled to it, I would never treat you any differently for it, but in my view if your born a guy your a guy.

Lastly let me say this, my biggest point, I honestly do not care if you are jill or John so long as your a decent person do what you like.

a reply to: honested3

Its about the kids and timing.

I have no problems with your lifestyle decisions,likes,dislikes, nor do I think its immoral, etc and only wish you the best and happy life you can have.

However, I would rather not expose my child at certain age to a lifestyle that is notoriously known to have a negative quality of life associated with it. As you said , it has a high suicide rate and that is something that I would prefer to avoid at all cost for my child.

Although we are a product of our environment, I'm not saying being exposed to trans-gender or accepting trans-gender will change or influence him to that lifestyle, but I prefer to avoid certain topics or exposure by him AT certain ages . As he gets older and I had MY chance to surround him with positive lifestyle influences in life , then I have no problems with him being exposed to the trans-genders lifestyle.

Although, if he were to come to me and say he is gay, trans-gender, or whatever than fair game, and I would do what ever I could to support and love him and figure it out together. In addition, if he were to have a fellow classmate that is gay or trans-gender than I would have no problems discussing the topic if he approaches me about it. I would also explain to him that we are not all alike and despite our differences we should all be respectful of each other and treat each other as human beings.

What I'm against is forcing parents to expose their children to such a lifestyle. Or having trans gender roles dramatized as a good thing in MSM children movies, tv shows , etc: just like I wouldn't want to see druggies , alcoholics, or abusive characters dramatized as a good thing with children content. It has nothing to do with anything, but the reality that trans genders don't typically have a good and easy life, hence the high suicide rates.

So live your life as you like, and be as happy as you can, but also be understanding of why parents would be hesitant of exposing their children to a lifestyle that brings struggles with it.

I hope to instil to my son to respect and accept everyone as equals despite their belief , lifestyle choices, and differences as long as they don't hurt others.

I certainly wouldn't want a child that is trans gender to feel hated or uncomfortable , but I also don't think its fair to expect a parent to not be hesitant when it comes to exposing their child to a hard lifestyle with such a high suicide rate.


I don't know what the answer is and I understand that their are a lot of ignorant people out there that discriminate based on sex,color,etc and we need to change that. However, we need to work with each other and respect each others concerns equally.

Best of luck to you and your family.

a reply to: OtherSideOfTheCoin

Of course you are entitled to your opinion, just remember that the general opinion that the world was flat was pretty solid too. That is, until we got more knowledgeable about how things really worked. Keep an open mind is all I'm sayin'.

ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conway/TS/TScauses.html

www.new scientist.com/article/dn20032-transsexual-differences-caught-on-brain-scan.html#

(No idea if these links will work - I'm using a tablet instead of laptop right now)

a reply to: interupt42

What about exposing your child to other types of people that may struggle in life, like black people or handicapped people or people with autism? And why are you comparing drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters to transgender men and women? Methinks you have a harsher opinion of transgenders than you are willing to admit. Too bad.

Personally, I don't mind transgender people. You guys are just people with an outlook I don't share. I understand some of it, respect it and wish you guys all the best. With that said, I feel disgusted when seeing someone of transgender. Why? Because of my sexuality. I am attracted to women for physicality, stereotypical behavior and reproduction. So when someone decides to change their sex from belief of being the opposite, it takes me far out of my comfort zone and attraction zone. I don't mean to offend by any means, just sharing how I truly feel.

For others though, too many reasons. You guys are the black people of the late 1800's.

best of luck buddy... miss.

originally posted by: kaylaluv
a reply to: interupt42

What about exposing your child to other types of people that may struggle in life, like black people or handicapped people or people with autism?

Bit racist or what? Because they are black they struggle? Or you just grasping at straws ?
Do black people have a high suicide rate ?

Handicapped people and kids with autism do not have as high suicide rate nor do they have the personal struggles as trans-gender.

And why are you comparing drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters to transgender men and women? Methinks you have a harsher opinion of transgenders than you are willing to admit. Too bad.

Why did you compare black people to a lifestyle of struggle?

I knew someone was going to jump on that,lol.

I wasn't comparing them to drug drug addicts , alcoholics and abusive characters in that sense . I was saying like the OP said that trangeders have a very hard life and one full of struggles. Well, just like drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive character who have a hard life and one full of struggles , I wouldn't want those type of characters portrayed as positive happy life in movies for my kid to watch when the reality is the opposite.

I have a great idea (I hope) . Why cant people of ANY group stop promoting the differences ? I believe that is the major reason someone not in a particular group does fear that group. Sure , prejudices exist for any and all groups. But is a person in a "different group" really different ? Some of us are placed in different groups by governments , businesses . The one question I think should be removed is race . Any time I see that one question , I answer human. Because no matter what imaginary group you belong to , you are still a member of the human race.The one term I have heard for the last 20 years is "Diversity" .Diversity comes from the Latin word "divertere" which means to "cast aside" . Why cant we change that to "Unity" ? Why does it have to be that we focus on differences and not similarities ? Think about it.

a reply to: interupt42

The reason why transgenders have high suicide rates may just have something to do with people comparing them to drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters. If they were completely accepted for who they are and treated with kindness and respect and equality, and if their family didn't disown them, I'd be willing to bet those suicide rates would plummet. What do you think?

Local to me in a massive supermarket a lady in a floral dress, with an anshaved face and high heels was doing her shopping. Some customers and staff had a point and a giggle and one of the team leaders was demoted to trolley boy after a front page story about the 'incident' was in the local paper.

Im all for each to their own but dont complain if you make an ass of it. If i go out today with the misses swagger on i expect to be pointed at.

If you have a job and a wife you have a life, enjoy it.

Back to your question, I think people are not used to seeing trandgender people so maybe that creates the fear you speak of. I dont know any who arent on tv. Theres a uk former boxer whos transgender, think his names Janice

originally posted by: kaylaluv
a reply to: interupt42

The reason why transgenders have high suicide rates may just have something to do with people comparing them to drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters.

It appears that you are the one NEGATIVELY comparing them to drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters. Are you saying that drug addicts, alcoholics are worthless people?

Again, I'm comparing trans genders to drug addicts and alcoholics because they in a sense also have a life full of struggle and not because the stigma that they are worthless individuals.

If they were completely accepted for who they are and treated with kindness and respect and equality, and if their family didn't disown them, I'd be willing to bet those suicide rates would plummet. What do you think?

I don't disagree, but that still doesn't take away from the fact that as of today transgenders do not have an easy life. Hence, that is something I would not wan't for my child, whats wrong with that? Why would you want your child to have a life of struggle?

However, I also said that if he were a transgender that I would support him and love him without hesitation.

In addition, I also said that I don't have the answer but both point of views should be respected in seeking the solution.

a reply to: OtherSideOfTheCoin

Like it or not you are still a male, you have a X and Y chromosome just like me, and through surgery you have only changed the appearance of your body but you are still under it all a dude.

That's actually an interesting point, how could the psyche have a different make-up than the physis? Sounds pretty impossible.
It would make it eventually the same disease as people changing themselefs entirely into Barbie, or Elvis.

a reply to: honested3
I haven't read the whole thread as I am at work today but I have always wanted to address this, I am a 52 year old married hetero male and I have been around gays in the past my last work partner is a lesbian, I got along just fine with her and her wife. I have also known a couple of trans gender people. well I have no problem with gays, I just am not like them and I don't really care much for the flamboyant ones. In my opinion they don't have to act that way, its just for attention. Now when it comes to trans gender, I don't care for the idea but its your life. What I don't like is the label of fear or phobic, I don't like eggplant but does that mean I am afraid of it? of coarse not. Its like saying because you didn't vote for Obama you are a bigot. just because you don't like or agree with something, it don't mean you are afraid of it. so lets try to drop that label of fear and phobias and just call it like it is Opinions

a reply to: interupt42

Being addicted to drugs is never a good thing. It kills brain cells and is detrimental to your health. Being abusive of others is never a good thing. Being a transgender is not a bad thing. Transgenders don't abuse others and they are totally capable of having jobs, raising families, etc. You absolutely cannot compare these groups of people without being disingenuous.

A child is not going to become a transgender by watching a movie featuring a happy transgender - it's a little more complicated than that.

a reply to: honested3

I was born in a female body...and my soul, spirit, mind and emotions are female too...but I do know that there are many people that are male in their souls etc. and are born in a female body...and many that are females born in a male body. These people just want their bodies to match who they really are...and changing that to me is really (considering their circumstances) a normal thing to do.

Many people get plastic surgery for things they don't like about their bodies; they get the surgery and feel more like themselves than they ever did before the surgery. Transgender people get surgery done and their outside ends up matching who they really are.

I say...live and let live...as long as someone is a good person and chooses not to be evil and do evil things...just let them be and accept them for the human being they are.

I have known (in my past) some transgender people and they were good people...thoughtful, creative and loving. They were also intelligent, interesting and fun to be around.

I am naturally a hetrosexual and when I go out into society...I don't have people pointing at me saying..."Oh look at her...the hetrosexual Caladonea!

I just wish that more people would look at others more like...we are all humans on this earth living, breathing, trying to make our way and figure it all out...instead of all the pointing of fingers and name calling and intolerance.

To love and be loved are the 2 greatest things in life...let's do more of that.

a reply to: kaylaluv

Being a transgender is not a bad thing. Transgenders don't abuse others and they are totally capable of having jobs, raising families, etc. You absolutely cannot compare these groups of people without being disingenuous.

Never said is a bad thing or they couldn't be productive or they are abusive to others, that is you saying that. All I said is that transgeders don't have an easy life.

A child is not going to become a transgender by watching a movie featuring a happy transgender - it's a little more complicated than that.

Never said they would. However, a happy transgender is not a realistic representation either, hence the high suicide rate.

originally posted by: kaylaluv
a reply to: interupt42

What about exposing your child to other types of people that may struggle in life, like black people or handicapped people or people with autism? And why are you comparing drug addicts, alcoholics and abusive characters to transgender men and women? Methinks you have a harsher opinion of transgenders than you are willing to admit. Too bad.

So you're saying you would choose that life for your children?

Skin color is like hair and eye color, but gender is as deep as your genes and requires some fairly major and traumatic therapies in order to attempt to force your outward seeming to conform to what your mental preference is.

Changing ones hair or eye color is a simply matter of a contact lens or dye. Changing skin color is again something we can't really accomplish and there are some who speculate that part of Michael Jackson's sad deterioration was in part a desire to have a different ethnicity than what he was. Again, not a very happy outcome or path I would ever suggest my child set himself on.

So why do you think we should embrace the idea of teaching our children that these paths are desirable ones? Shouldn't it be enough that children know they exist.

a reply to: honested3

What an insightful OP, best wishes to you.

I don't understand people who are trans gender, how can anyone who isn't? Ive known somone who is trans gender and treated her like the gender she felt she was.

All we can do is listen and empathise with what must be at times, an intolerable situation in terms of having to deal with how people react towards you.

I think the acceptance of society towards trans gender people will only happen with time through raising awareness of it. The more we put to bed the untruths and misconceptions people have towards the issue the better.

a reply to: interupt42

The other misperception is that all the unhappiness in some lifestyles is subjected on them by the outside world. And I don't think that's entirely true.

I think at least part of the unhappiness stems from a deep dislike of who and what they are. If they were happy with who they were, they wouldn't be trying so hard to be something other than what they were born. And I think they need to embrace and recognize that before they project all that inner unhappiness on the rest of the world.

I'm not saying that transgendered folks do not face obstacles in life, but everyone faces obstacles in life. It's very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that if only everyone else loved you that you would love you too. I've been there, and it's a false line of thought.

a reply to: caladonea

Souls being male or female? I am pretty sure I have been incarnated each way.

All I see is another person seeking attention, and enough support to go around calling people bigots.

Some people get really fired up about false advertising.

If you were so sure you were Transgender, you wouldn't be looking for confirmation and acceptance of your choices.

I have such people in my family. It is a sin, although no worse then any of mine.

All I see here is weakness and shame looking to justify itself.

Maybe my eyes are going.

Be what you are and be proud of it. Nobody cares why you feel like you do, and most people don't care why it makes them uncomfortable.

I don't see any motives for the OP that are remotely earnest.

originally posted by: honested3

originally posted by: Xtrozero
1
3. Six foot two guy with 5 o'clock shadow wearing a mini skirt is just creepy...just saying...

And I am sure you have the perfect model body with sculpted abs and so on that nobody could ever look at you and think you are creepy or unappealing in any way at all. A bit narrow minded and shallow there dont you think?

To answer your question I think that (as another poster said) lack of exposure is part of the issue. We just aren't used to seeing transgender people. The other part is that I think for most heterosexual males the thought of being "fooled" by a man dressed as a woman is very disconcerting, in that fundamental, and generally shallow, Challenge Their Manhood sort of way. Its pretty silly, but a lot of silly machismo things are major movers for society. It is what it is.

I also think that there is a lot of media attention on transgender people and even some in schools and for the most part (because most people fall toward heterosexuality on that continuum) this is actually confusing to children and adolescents. Most people's gender identity matches their body. What you are experiencing is relatively rare, powerful and legitimate, but rare.

Having said that, I think that this was not an "honest" question and that you are (in spite of what you said) pushing an agenda, even if that agenda is just making a platform so that you can argue with people. No one responded to your initial question in a way that was particularly disrespectful to you or your opinion, but your first responses to others were disrespectful, combative and not very informative. You aren't teaching anyone anything at this point, and I don't think that you are really learning anything, you are just trying to yell at the people that express opinions that you don't like. Don't ask people to answer a question and then berate them for doing it honestly. I'm disappointed, this could have been a good dialogue but instead both sides are just going to become entrenched in their positions and getting angrier.

Way to go.