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Is the American way of friendships superficial?

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posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 11:55 AM
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Is the American way of friendships superficial?

One of the things I'm quite critical of American society now was that many Americans (Not all of course) seem to appear superficial.

In fact I read an article and there are foreigners who considered American friendships as superficial




People commented on the fact that Americans often “come on very friendly” in the beginning stages of a friendship and then sort of disappear. They also mentioned that even close friendships with Americans are very difficult to maintain. If you don’t see the American for a while there tends to be an “out of sight, out of mind” attitude and those friendships eventually peter out.

This is not news to me. My French and German friends have often similarly lamented about how “American friendships can be horribly superficial.”




www.takenbythewind.com...


Personally I find it true in our society. Far too many people who been superficial. I've seen people who would pretend to be your friend only to back stab you.

So folks what do you think?




posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:10 PM
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Well I know several Americans and I don't find their friendship superficial.

I think this may be more of a stereotype, like people saying "Germans don't have a sense of humour". Germans do have a sense of humour and American friendship is not superficial. Just my experience.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:12 PM
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My best friend is American



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:14 PM
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Oh boy another American hate thread. This thread should go far while dealing with all the superficial American haters on this site. Congratulations you pick the right group to talk about here.
edit on 19-4-2015 by Greathouse because: (no reason given)

edit on 19-4-2015 by Greathouse because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:15 PM
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a reply to: Greathouse

If you look at my thread I said not all Americans but many.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:16 PM
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a reply to: paraphi

In my personal experience since I live in LA I notice people are more into material things than real people. In Black Friday there are people who fight over pencils and bubble gum.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:19 PM
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I'm English and I find a lot of English people to be superficial. It's not an American thing, it's a product of Western society being ludicrously superficial and materialistic by design.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:24 PM
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a reply to: SensiblyReckless

To be honest a lot of people that I consider real people are either people who is an internal exile , people from poor neighborhoods, people who would prefer a few good friends than many fake friends, or immigrants from the Third World like my parents. Living in LA I notice that people especially Beverly Hills are petty shallow. I see that it's a Western thing. Thanks for the heads up.

edit on 19-4-2015 by starwarsisreal because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:37 PM
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a reply to: starwarsisreal

People who are very wealthy are probably not going to get past a 'superficial' friendship with those who are not. They are paranoid about being used.

I have close friendships, and I have 'acquaintances' - people I am friendly with when I see them. There are sometimes people who try to force friendships, and claim a closer friendship than actually exists. They usually want something from you, most often, assets.

We are careful I guess, about who will welcome into our inner circle, but I don't know if that is an American thing, or a human thing. We are cautious creatures, most of us.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:40 PM
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originally posted by: starwarsisreal
a reply to: Greathouse

If you look at my thread I said not all Americans but many.


Potato...................potatoe



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:40 PM
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I've found that several of the Americans that I've met, seem to get overly "excited" at the smallest thing, though that smallest thing, is often quickly forgotten about. I've not found them unpleasant, but, yes, sometimes a little superficial. I think it's just a cultural thing. I prefer to learn quickly of the thoughts of the person that I'm in conversation with, without superfluous grandeur at nothing at all. That way, you quickly learn where you are with that person.
edit on 19-4-2015 by Meduzi because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 12:46 PM
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originally posted by: starwarsisreal
a reply to: SensiblyReckless

To be honest a lot of people that I consider real people are either people who is an internal exile , people from poor neighborhoods, people who would prefer a few good friends than many fake friends, or immigrants from the Third World like my parents. Living in LA I notice that people especially Beverly Hills are petty shallow. I see that it's a Western thing. Thanks for the heads up.


Good post.

I think many people get the term friend confused with acquaintance. Because you can consider yourself a lucky person. If it takes all the fingers of one hand to name you're truly close friends. ( people usually hold some resentment for other people therefore they tolerate or be polite to people they really don't like)
edit on 19-4-2015 by Greathouse because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:03 PM
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a reply to: starwarsisreal

It's certainly a Western attitude, and it could be linked with personal wealth. Unfortunately, wealth often negates the need for friendship - a sad, yet present reality. I've found also, in the UK, people sometimes become suspicious when I'm trying to be friendly with them, of whom I've simply found genuinely interesting. Yet in all cases, I've asked for nothing in return, other than friendship, something that I've always considered personally valuable.


edit on 19-4-2015 by Meduzi because:



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:08 PM
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a reply to: starwarsisreal



Is the American way of friendships superficial?


Wouldn`t that be something very difficult to asses by individuals ?

My guess is, you can find everywhere people with similar experience. I have noticed in my personal life also enough people having, which would I considerer to be very superficial friendships, however also the opposite...I would think that those people who have superficial friendships would have the perception it being so, while the others don`t have that perception.
edit on 19 4 2015 by BornAgainAlien because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:09 PM
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originally posted by: starwarsisreal
a reply to: SensiblyReckless

To be honest a lot of people that I consider real people are either people who is an internal exile , people from poor neighborhoods, people who would prefer a few good friends than many fake friends, or immigrants from the Third World like my parents. Living in LA I notice that people especially Beverly Hills are petty shallow. I see that it's a Western thing. Thanks for the heads up.


I like this post a lot.

The thing about Western society is that you get both worlds - you get the poor, who are much more experienced in real life and are unlikely to hold superficial values, and then you get the superficial types who are a direct product of the system we live in. Dog eat dog, apparently. I don't hold those views and I know who I'd pick as friends....



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:13 PM
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I would suggest that anyone believing their 5000 count of Facebook "friends" to epitomise the modern appearance of superficial pretendy friendships.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:17 PM
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ooo friends



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:18 PM
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A friend is someone who is there for you when you need them, and vice versa. It's just that simple. Friends don't care about appearances or money or looks or what other people think.

I had a friend who had a lot of facebook friends and was very depressed and I could sense it, but I had shut myself off so much and was so afraid that I didn't go out of my way in enough time to reach him and he killed himself. I still think if only I had reached out more then something could have been done. But in the end, any suicide has only themselves to blame, and if people aren't strong enough to make it on their own, then they just don't survive. That's not really anyone's fault I know that now. Just some people aren't strong enough to take things.



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 01:46 PM
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By definition, real friendships aren't superficial. Few of those are made over a lifetime. Mostly what we got is associations, which some people want to call friends so as not to appear abnormal.

"Yah, I have lots of friends."

What you got is people you know and call friends, but I bet few measure up when acid tested.


edit on 19-4-2015 by intrptr because: spelling



posted on Apr, 19 2015 @ 02:04 PM
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TELL ME ABOUT IT.

The internet is just filled with people who say nice #ing things but in the end it doesn't mean #.



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