You have the right to your opinion- on this topic, and on me as well.
I do not hold the opinion that physical conflicts are never ever appropriate or acceptable.
I also do not believe that females should be taught to never ever defend themselves physically. I was a victim of being physically attacked when young
and that specific principle kept me passive and taking it, becoming a target for anyone who wanted to beat on someone, anyone, for fun. Until the day
I had to strike back before I lost consciousness. Then it all stopped. Self defense is sometimes necessary. Especially when it comes to kids.
There is a reason young boys have more rough and tumble games, it is a part of gaining confidence in yourself, and your body. Teenage boys,
especially, often come to a period in which they find relief in finally coming up against someone who has an impact and set them limits that are
concrete and felt. –Not just imaginary verbal lines. The hormonal surges of adolescence are sometimes overwhelming to the boy, their own force can
seem out of their ability to control completely, and knowing that there are others that help him with that control can be comforting.
Wait until your girls become constant victims of sexual harassment from boys, starting with verbal attacks, and then getting more and more intense,
(being grabbed, touched, forcefully groped). Tell her to just say no, and see if those boys will suddenly control themselves. Or make her dependant
upon you or some other male, to come in and use the physical force to protect her.
The problem with that second approach is that you can’t always be with her. If she can’t defend herself, might as well move to Saudi Arabia,
cover her up completely and live within laws which make her unable to go outside without a male escort.
I don’t know what you find sexist about my position- I think that it is sexist to condone the natural effects of testosterone altogether, making
masculinity “bad” or unacceptable.
There is a time and place for everything. Everything becomes bad in excess, but in moderation, and in appropriate circumstances, it all has it’s
Someone breaking your nose when you didn't deserve it would make you angry, of course. Someone breaking your nose because you were sexually harrassing
them in a vulgar way? You don't think a part of you would KNOW you deserved it?
One thing I have seen is that we treat kids as if they are stupid about their own behavior- as if they don't know when they have been out of line and
when they haven't. I've found they often do. I have found they even feel like they have no impact on the world or others when they can be cruel, act
up, do obviously bad things, and get no appropriate forceful reaction. Then they start upping the ante, trying to get some sort of reaction that
reflects they exist for others and their behavior matters.
BTW- I am getting sick of hearing "Bluesma, I respected you until now, now that you have disagreed with me." I am not here to win any popularity
contests, and being respected by strangers on the other side of the world is not any sort of a treat for me. I don't choose my opinions or views
according to what will please, and will not change them for that reason. I understand people find it uncomfortable that someone disagrees with them,
especially principles they feel strongly. But this is not about judging personalities and looking for popularity.
edit on 12-4-2015 by Bluesma
because: (no reason given)