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Like Lightening

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posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 08:33 AM
Ummm...Hello once's a poem that deals with the cure for illness and melancholy...I hope you enjoy

Please critique for me if you would...

To Be

You are not whole though ill they said
Your chance of ever leaving bed
For sick thou art and shall remain
Forever bowed beneath this pain

So I believed with fractured heart
Of ever playing life’s full part
Always captive in this spell
Never brilliant never well

Sculptors they to mold my fate
Chart my course to deaths own gate
I bemused in full remorse
Never the captain of my course

Until one day a special gift
Like lightning opened hopes own rift
Breached that dismal quality
That long had been a part of me

A spirit brought her essence there
Left it linger on the air
Threw back curtains to the morn
That fever’s end that day be born

She came to me and shameless smiled
Calling to that shadow child
Welcome welcome to the light
Infusing me against the blight

So in time at times own pace
I put away my sickly face
Gathered strength and lay no more
Knocking mournful at deaths door

Oh that one that rescued me
Forever by my side shall be
For love was born that sultry day
It’s there I fell and there I stay

Thank you

edit on 13-3-2015 by YouSir because: of an incorrectedness...requiring correction...

posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 08:41 AM
a reply to: YouSir

I love love, too!
That was really excellent (as always) YouSir. It felt timeless and reminds me of something, but I can't put my finger on it.
Actually I can, it reminds me of Thomas Hardy although I couldn't say why.
Just gorgeous.

B x

posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 08:44 AM
I really liked it!

It made me think of my Mother.
Of course, most things these days make me think of her...

Thank you!

posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 08:51 AM
That was wonderful!!

posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 09:25 AM
a reply to: YouSir

Picture My Wings Clapping for You Sir! Very well done!!!
I agree with beansidhe. It has a Timeless Feel to it!!!

Very Well done Indeed!!!

posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 12:42 PM
a reply to: beansidhe

Ummm...thank you BeanSidhe...I have felt what a powerful presence love can be...and conversely how devastating it's sudden lack as well...When I was young...I was very ill for long period's of time on numerous certainly caused me to be introspective as I wiled away long hours and my siblings ran, laughed and played...while I could only lie there...I remember how hard it was to climb out of the grip of melancholy and find interest in life and living again...

You are entirely too kind...I could only hope to ever live up to such honor as you have bestowed upon me...
With all respect...


posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 09:00 PM
a reply to: TNMockingbird

Ummm...thank you TNMockingbird...I'm a little curious about your response...I was wondering if it was a Frank Burns quote...?

I apologize if it were a more personal comment...again...thank you...


posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 09:12 PM
a reply to: Night Star

Ummm...thank you Night Star...sometimes love is the culmination of an unsought journey whose travail is better represented by other emotional states which heal...much like a more mundane wound...cured so well by that helix like sharing...that it does not leave a scar..................sometimes...


posted on Mar, 13 2015 @ 09:26 PM
a reply to: SyxPak

Ummm...Here's to the clap of wing and tankards of mead...may their foamy heads quaffed by man and Wyvern...never cease to elicit such ribald turn of phrase as The Suffering Bastard pub...might demand...

Thank you Sir... timelessness...


posted on Mar, 14 2015 @ 01:30 AM
a reply to: YouSir

You are Very Welcome!
And I now shall Thank You for such an Eloquent Reply.
Thank You! I am hoping forever all will be good for You and Yours in Your World!

From My Mug and Yours We,
Shall Drink to You And Me.
!!! (~ CLINK ~) !!!

~ TimeLessness!! ~

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