posted on Dec, 16 2004 @ 10:40 AM
A short rendition of thoughts to ponder over...
A time comes in your life when you finally get it! When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the
voice inside your head cries out -ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum,
your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world
through new eyes. This is your awakening.
You realize that itís time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next
horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world there arenít always
fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of ďhappily ever afterĒ must begin with you and in the process a sense of
serenity is born of acceptance.
You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are. . . and thatís
OK (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process a sense of
newfound confidence is born of self-approval.
You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you .(or didnít do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really
count on is the unexpected. You learn that people donít always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for
you and that itís not always about you.
So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self reliance. You stop
judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a
sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness. You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you, is as a result of
all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.
And you begin to sift through all the crap that you have been fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you should weigh, what
you should wear and where you should shop and what you should drive, how and where you should live and what you should do for a living, who you should
sleep with, who you should marry and what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe your
You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.
You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values youíve outgrown, or should never have bought
into to begin with and in the process you learn to go with your instincts. You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive. And that there is
power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop manoeuvring through life merely as a ďconsumerĒ looking for your next fix.
You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation
upon which you must build a life. You learn that you donít know everything; itís not your job to save the world and that you canít teach a pig to
sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the
only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.
Then you learn about love - romantic love and familial love : how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You
learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or
important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would
have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.
You learn that just as people grow and change so it is with love and you learn that you donít have the right to demand love on your terms just to make
you happy. And, you learn that alone does not mean lonely. And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5
or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you ďstack up.Ē
You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement
are perfectly OK ... and that it is your right to want things and to ask for the things that you want.. . and that sometimes it is necessary to make
You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you wonít settle for less. And, you allow
only the hands of a lover who cherishes you to glorifyí you with his/her touch and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect.
And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking
more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to
rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.
You learn that for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve. . . and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You
learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen.
More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all
alone and that itís OK to risk asking for help.
You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time, FEAR itself.
You learn top right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle them and to give in to fear is to give away the
right to live life on your terms. And you learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that
life isnít always fair, you donít always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes, bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these
occasions you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isnít punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. Itís just life happening.
And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be
understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong
and to build bridges instead of walls.
You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only
dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by
yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heartís desire. And you hang a wind
chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful
Finally, with courage in your heart and love in your soul you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live
as best as you can.