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How does one resolve this? Grandmother and the Cat.

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posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 10:12 PM
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I'd like to tell you all a story about a grandmother and the cat.

It's not the story you all might think - a sweet little old lady with a pussy-cat at her feet.

Oh no, this grandmother came from a time where pets caught vermin, and were perhaps fed some table scraps.

Now this cat arrived with a family as a kitten, and it quickly stole everybody's hearts.
It was a black and white Maine Coon type cat, with a sweet personality.

Now the cat had already been living with the family for about a decade, and never caused much fuss.

Then a grandmother was moved into the house, who wasn't charmed by the kitty at all.

Now one day the grandson heard a scream, and it was his mother, and she cried that grandmother just tried to poke or hit the cat from its perch on the piano with her walking stick.

So the grandson confronted his granny, and told her that the cat is allowed to lie there.
Actually it was a good thing the father (the granny's son) didn't see any of this, because he had told her before that the cat is a part of the family.
Granny was unrepentant, and replied that this is fine, let the darn cat scratch everything.
The cat had never scratched furniture ever.

Now granny is very upset.
She refuses to interact fully as before, and thinks everything she does is wrong.
Granny also has a sweet side, and maybe she really wanted to save the piano from damage.
Maybe in her day, cats weren't allowed to lie on furniture.

How does one resolve this?




edit on 10-2-2015 by halfoldman because: (no reason given)




posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 10:15 PM
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a reply to: halfoldman

You tell Granny the cat is a member of the family and to be treated with kindness or she (Granny) can find another place to live--and mean it.



posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 10:24 PM
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a reply to: Tangerine
Thanks for that.

Good advice.



posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 10:57 PM
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a reply to: halfoldman

Task the grandmother with the training of the cat so that it doesn't lie on the furniture. Explain how to use positive reinforcement and that cats are nowhere near as clever as people.



posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 11:05 PM
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a reply to: halfoldman

I'd pick the cat over the Granny if she is swinging a mean cane. She has already been told.She needs to respect the wishes of the people's whose house it is,not make up her own rules.



posted on Feb, 10 2015 @ 11:57 PM
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Perhaps she was just trying to save the piano as you also thought. She probably does get that it is part of the family as well. As you said though, she comes from a time when cats were varmets. So, she was probably raised to think it is ok to discipline the cat the way she did.

I think instead of getting upset about it and trying to figure out what to do, why not just try to show her better ways about how to discipline the cat if it is on the furniture or what have you. A simple rolled up paper to just slap across her wrist to make that smack sound may be enough to startle the cat to move on. Or just show her how the family goes about it.

Let her know that you know she has accepted the fact that it is part of the family. You said she had a sweet side. Try to address the sweet granny, not the old grumpy lady with a walking stick.... Hope that all made sense.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 01:29 AM
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originally posted by: onehuman
Perhaps she was just trying to save the piano as you also thought. She probably does get that it is part of the family as well. As you said though, she comes from a time when cats were varmets. So, she was probably raised to think it is ok to discipline the cat the way she did.

I think instead of getting upset about it and trying to figure out what to do, why not just try to show her better ways about how to discipline the cat if it is on the furniture or what have you. A simple rolled up paper to just slap across her wrist to make that smack sound may be enough to startle the cat to move on. Or just show her how the family goes about it.

Let her know that you know she has accepted the fact that it is part of the family. You said she had a sweet side. Try to address the sweet granny, not the old grumpy lady with a walking stick.... Hope that all made sense.


Anyone who abuses and animal has no excuses. Period. Just because someone is old does not mean they spent their lives in a cave and suddenly came to the surface in old age. This notion that old people aren't responsible for their behavior is bunk.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 04:01 AM
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a reply to: halfoldman

Get rid of the cat.

I may be slightly biased.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 05:22 AM
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a reply to: halfoldman

Old people can be so selfish and cold sometimes, especially when people help them and they don't appreciate it.

Tell her she has to go if she can't accept the cat and it's freedoms. Just mention the words "into a home", that should do the trick.
edit on 11/2/2015 by nerbot because: (no reason given)



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 06:19 AM
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Ignorance is no excuse for abuse. Tell granny to stop it or you'll train the cat to attack her and hide her cane.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 06:22 AM
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a reply to: butcherguy

Get rid of the Grandmother...I too am biased.






posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 06:30 AM
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a reply to: boymonkey74

Okay, that's it.
I'm telling Grammie!



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 06:48 AM
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originally posted by: halfoldman
I'd like to tell you all a story about a grandmother and the cat.

It's not the story you all might think - a sweet little old lady with a pussy-cat at her feet.

Oh no, this grandmother came from a time where pets caught vermin, and were perhaps fed some table scraps.

Now this cat arrived with a family as a kitten, and it quickly stole everybody's hearts.
It was a black and white Maine Coon type cat, with a sweet personality.

Now the cat had already been living with the family for about a decade, and never caused much fuss.

Then a grandmother was moved into the house, who wasn't charmed by the kitty at all.

Now one day the grandson heard a scream, and it was his mother, and she cried that grandmother just tried to poke or hit the cat from its perch on the piano with her walking stick.

So the grandson confronted his granny, and told her that the cat is allowed to lie there.
Actually it was a good thing the father (the granny's son) didn't see any of this, because he had told her before that the cat is a part of the family.
Granny was unrepentant, and replied that this is fine, let the darn cat scratch everything.
The cat had never scratched furniture ever.

Now granny is very upset.
She refuses to interact fully as before, and thinks everything she does is wrong.
Granny also has a sweet side, and maybe she really wanted to save the piano from damage.
Maybe in her day, cats weren't allowed to lie on furniture.

How does one resolve this?





I'm sure Granny was also raised in a time of showing respect to other people over showing respect to animals, and this is obviously a shift in dynamics for her as well as not being head of her own house and making her own rules. She may even feel although her intentions may have been well and good, that your family favors the cat over her, and that has caused her to withdraw. I suggest having a pleasant, not confrontational, but definitely REASSURING chat with Granny that both she and the cat are part of the family, but being that it is ultimately your home, there are certain parameters for both and both must come to a mutual respect. Let granny know, the cat certainly wouldn't understand a shift in command either and if she treats it with kindness it may show her the same. True, some people are just not cat people, but if you reside together there needs to be a mutual understanding. * My cat wholeheartedly agrees...



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 07:14 AM
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They make silicone nail sheaths that can be attached to kitty's nails to prevent furniture damage and scratched skin. I realize kitty has no history of scratching things, but if Granny is truly very upset about the possibility then giving them a try might console her and help her feel that her worries matter to the family.

Also, does kitty like to catch the laser light? That's a fun and easy game and perhaps Granny and kitty need some playtime together to bond.

Don't be too harsh on Granny, moving to a new place and trying to fit in with the family is probably more stressful to her than anyone realizes. And as she ages she is probably not herself in many ways and may show stress by acting out similar to how a child would. She is no longer in full control of her life anymore, and that's a hard thing for her to deal with. I'm sure she is grateful to your family for helping her and caring for her. Show Granny she belongs in her new home by trying to accomodate her concerns whenever possible.

Oh and I thought I'd add ... does Granny like little dogs? Perhaps if Granny had a pet of her own to to care for and love on, she would feel more in control of her situation and feel like she had a daily purpose to care for the little guy.
edit on 11-2-2015 by eeyipes because: (no reason given)



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 08:59 AM
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Thanks, you all have been spot on in your responses.

Simply putting somebody in a home is not that easy here, but we'll be nice to granny and act like nothing happened.

Can't compromise on kitty though, because I've seen enough episodes of "My Cat From Hell" to know that when cats feel threatened it can cause all kinds of behavioral problems.

It's a pity they don't have behavior experts on reality television that deal with grannies.

Going to read everything again and mull over it, but thanks everybody.

edit on 11-2-2015 by halfoldman because: (no reason given)



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 09:16 AM
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Kitties have a funny way of sneaking into people's hearts when they least expect it. Perhaps Granny and Kitty will become best buds with a little time and patience. Good luck!



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 10:53 AM
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Give granny a squirt bottle containing water. a reply to: halfoldman



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 11:35 AM
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BTDT (not the hitting with a cane, but with full-on hand-smacking)

Very explicitly explain that Fluffy was there before Granny was, and Granny being a guest must respect that & respect Fluffy. Hitting, striking or mistreatment of any kind will not be tolerated whatsoever, and if it continues or happens again, Granny finds another residence elsewhere, no exceptions -- abusiveness towards a member of the household (human or otherwise) will not be tolerated.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 05:05 PM
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originally posted by: eeyipes
They make silicone nail sheaths that can be attached to kitty's nails to prevent furniture damage and scratched skin. I realize kitty has no history of scratching things, but if Granny is truly very upset about the possibility then giving them a try might console her and help her feel that her worries matter to the family.

Also, does kitty like to catch the laser light? That's a fun and easy game and perhaps Granny and kitty need some playtime together to bond.

Don't be too harsh on Granny, moving to a new place and trying to fit in with the family is probably more stressful to her than anyone realizes. And as she ages she is probably not herself in many ways and may show stress by acting out similar to how a child would. She is no longer in full control of her life anymore, and that's a hard thing for her to deal with. I'm sure she is grateful to your family for helping her and caring for her. Show Granny she belongs in her new home by trying to accomodate her concerns whenever possible.

Oh and I thought I'd add ... does Granny like little dogs? Perhaps if Granny had a pet of her own to to care for and love on, she would feel more in control of her situation and feel like she had a daily purpose to care for the little guy.


You're suggesting that another animal be given to Granny to abuse. That's horrible advice. So is the laser. If pointed at an animal's or human's eyes it can cause blindness.



posted on Feb, 11 2015 @ 05:06 PM
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originally posted by: donktheclown
Give granny a squirt bottle containing water. a reply to: halfoldman



So she can use another method to abuse the cat? What didn't you get about the cat being allowed to lie where he was lying?
edit on 11-2-2015 by Tangerine because: (no reason given)



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