What type of relationship do you have with God?

My relationship with God is pretty one sided.
I cannot in anyway please my God, without his help. Everything I do for him by myself turns to crap.
Unless he decides to do something with me it will always turn to crap and I know it.
However my God is gracious beyond all belief.
I sometimes wonder why we as people think we can do anything for him that can amount to anything but fail, in sight of his perfection.
It sometimes dawns on me how everything we do is flawed, everything he has made we have tarnished, and yet he still loves us.
I will never understand why he loves me, why he would ever consider me worth his time or why he would even allow me to be born.
I am a wretched, flawed,evil, and wicked man and he still loves me.
I am glad that does however, because he has given me the opportunity to see him one day, in his whole glory.
There are days when I wish I could just lay down and die to see him in his glory sooner, however there are other days when I am scared to. Not because I know that he does not consider me good enough, because he has declared me righteous but because I am so incredibly ashamed at how often I have failed him, and I know that I will continue to fail him until I die.
But like always I know these feelings will pass as well, as they always do, and he again makes me feel spotless.

When one realizes God, relationship ends and relating happens.
The realization of God is the end of twoness so there is not something having a relationship with something else.
There is just relating in the immediacy............. which is one.