Wife's Ultimatum: Get Rid of Newborn With Down Syndrome or Get Divorced. He Chose...

GoFundMe, It's the next evolutionary step in the lottery system.

All it takes is a well written(and likely heavily embellished) story and then it's just a matter of whether or not the viral train will pick up on it.

If it does, bam. Your in the money.

I've noticed this more and more lately. I take any story with a GoFundMe reference as having a 99% chance of being false and really just a get rich quick scheme.

ETA: And these will never stop, since everybody wins. The perpetrators get their money, the media gets a story(and ad revenue clicks) and the people being coned get to clear their conscious for a few measly dollars.

a reply to: Sparkly_Eyed777

My son was born premature and I was told he would not live. The doctors and hospital refused to let me see him no matter how much I asked because they did not want me to get attached, so they said.

Then, when he had lived for three days and the diagnosis changed from them calling for his imminent death to them saying he would be retarded due to lack of oxygen to his brain they did finally let me see him. At this point however, I had a barrage of various social workers trying to get me to give him up..

Funny thing though, even believing that my son would have many problems for the rest of my life never gave me anything to think about or to discuss. I was keeping my son - why? Because he was my flesh and blood and I loved him, regardless.

So honestly, even with her story the husband is believable. Any woman who believes giving up her own child is discussable due to downs isn't on the same page as the rest of us where concerns our offspring. When you put both their stories together it sounds like he at least felt the "support" she was asking for was to give up their child, and seemed to feel a need to protect the child from that.

a reply to: OpinionatedB

I dont know, if you know your child will have a better quality of life, better quality of health care and a much brighter future living with their father rather than you as the mother, wouldnt you be prepared to make that scrifice for your child?
Maybe that level of sacrifice is something a lot of mothers could not give.

a reply to: WilsonWilson

That is not the decision she was making. As I added in the edit, when you put both their stories together, it seems like he felt the "support" she was asking from him was to give up their child, and he seemed to feel a need to protect the child from that.

I don't know for sure because I've never been faced with the choice, but I think if I knew pre-birth that the child had Down's or something similar, I would choose to abort. I'm not going to pretend I'm that heroic.

But then again I have a pretty jaded view on humanity's general value.

a reply to: OpinionatedB

Yes but that not what her side of the story was, he didnt want her to go to New Zealand with him, and she let him take baby because he would have a better life, than than with her.

Flame away if you must...but...you shouldn't judge this woman without talking and/or knowing her. What if she simply knew she couldn't do it. What if she knew that deep inside, if she even tried this she would end up loathing the child because of the extra level of responsibility. I'll withhold my judgement, but I would much rather someone that CAN'T handle a child...not have one. I would have rather she found out before the child was born, but I'm not there to judge.

What is worse than a parent that isn't there? A parent that is there but resents the child. Know who you are and what your limits are. It is often more important to realize what you don't know, than what you do...to see your flaws as well as where you excel.

originally posted by: DanKeizer
I don't know for sure because I've never been faced with the choice, but I think if I knew pre-birth that the child had Down's or something similar, I would choose to abort. I'm not going to pretend I'm that heroic.

But then again I have a pretty jaded view on humanity's general value.

Just so you know you are not alone --- I would too. I would abort a defective fetus if caught early enough.

It's a tough world even for those who seem to "have it all".

Would I love a child no matter what? Absolutely! But, what happens if I die? It's very selfish.

Having a baby, any baby is an extremely selfish act. There is not one unselfish reason to bring another child into this world.

So I have read both stories and maybe I missed it, but the mother said that the father wanted to go to New Zealand to raise the baby in a place that is more welcoming and helpful for special needs children.
If I understand correctly, she said she thinks that's was a good idea and was even the first person to think that the move to New Zealand would be best.
So the question then would be why don't she move to New Zealand and get visitation rights?
Was this covered in a post a skimmed over?

originally posted by: Punisher75
So I have read both stories and maybe I missed it, but the mother said that the father wanted to go to New Zealand to raise the baby in a place that is more welcoming and helpful for special needs children.
If I understand correctly, she said she thinks that's was a good idea and was even the first person to think that the move to New Zealand would be best.
So the question then would be why don't she move to New Zealand and get visitation rights?
Was this covered in a post a skimmed over?

In the hardest moment of my life when my husband should be next to me and support and help to take the right decision, I could not find any support from his side. After that incident, he left the hospital notifying me hours later that he was taking the kid with him, that he is going to leave the country for New Zealand and I do not have anything to do with the situation. Without giving me any option and trying to find with me any solution in this hardest situation, he started to circulate the story on every possible platform without even trying to give me a voice accusing that I put him an ultimatum marriage or the baby, which is absolutely not true. I tried several times to communicate but he never tried to listen me and to find common solutions. The only response was the accusation from his part.

Sam has never suggested joining him and bringing up the child together in his country. Neither did he tell me anything on the day we filed for divorce. The only thing he kept saying was that he didn't want us to separate, whereas my question what we should do always remained unanswered.

I could be mistaken but it sounds like dad upped and moved without her, then put the blame on her and doesn't want her with them. That or this is all a GoFundMe scam and they will happily ever after with their new found wealth in New Zealand shortly after enough people contribute.

I personally don't know how to take this story due to the fact it's gone viral and there is a donation button on it if you get my meaning

But I have a disabled daughter we didn't find out till after she was 18 months what it was i even wrote a post on this site about it (it's very rare). Now as I was growing up in was surrounded by family who believed abortions are wrong and I still believe in that 99% of the time. But I will say hand on heart if anyone told me that they had aborted a disabled child I would not judge them I have brought a disabled child up when was told she wouldn't make it past the age of 2 and would never walk and talk but 5 years later she won her sports day at school

She is now 7 and leads a good life for her disability but everyday is hard I put her to bed every night took her in give her a kiss and say goodnight with the fear of it may be last ttime I get to do it. I know there are people out there that couldn't cope with this type of thing.

Now saying all this I have said I would not judge a parent for making this kind of decision but I wouldn't condone it either.

If the story is as read and that's what 100% is has happened then give this man a medal for wanting to stand up and bring up a disabled child on his own

I think we can stop vilifying the wife now.


The REST of the story

More details of Mr Forrest's background are emerging, including that he left New Zealand four years ago following a messy divorce that saw him lose his three daughters and one son.

His youngest daughter was born with Down syndrome - the same condition affecting three-week-old son Leo.

Mr Forrest, who lived with his wife and children in Whanganui on New Zealand's north island, was brought up as a member of the Exclusive Brethren church.

He was ex-communicated from the church when he divorced his wife and was banned from seeing his four children, now aged between six and 15 years old.

In a series of emails around the time he left the church, Mr Forrest repeatedly says he 'lost four innocent children' and blames the Exclusive Brethren for the 'deliberate break-up of a family'.

'All his extended family are also members of the Exclusive Brethren and are still forbidden by their religion to have any contact with him,' a source said.

'It was one of the reasons why he left in the first place and went to Armenia. He had no contact with his children and saw no future for himself in New Zealand. It was all very sad.'

So if he saw this happen to him and he didn't like it, why then, is he doing this to his new wife? Habit from the religion? He took the baby and left for New Zealand without a howdy-do to her, without giving her to opportunity to go with him. I question why.

'In the hardest moment of my life when my husband should be next to me and support and help to take the right decision, I could not find any support from his side.

'After that incident, he left the hospital notifying me hours later that he was taking the kid with him, that he is going to leave the country for New Zealand and I do not have anything to do with the situation.'

Mr Forrest's crowd funding website has already raised more than $490,000 in his bid to bring up baby Leo in Auckland where he can have access to established disability services.

But it is unclear how much family support he will receive when he returns.

'It's well known within the Exclusive Brethren community that Sam has been cut off by everyone because of divorcing his wife. He has no one to come back to,' a source said.

'You would hope that he'd get some support but it's very unlikely.'

a reply to: ~Lucidity

You are right. I would never leave a baby with down's syndrome, but every person is different. If she couldn't handle it, better to know now, for the baby and for her. No reason to make her out like the devil.