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Killing Possums

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posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 04:55 PM
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Uh-Oh, this is not good.
Apparently a high ranking possum has been caught. Early interogations have revealed that the Possum jihad are now training not only possums how to cross the roads, but Raccoons as well..



This is breaking news, as developments break we will keep you updated....




posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 05:41 PM
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I am sorry to report that in fact Raccoons are crossing to roads. Not long ago their secret was reveled. Raccoons are "terminator possums" with a titanium hardened shell to protect the "brain" possum inside. Early torture of the captured possums by anti-possum special forces in Abu Graib had falsely reveled that raccoons were genetic mutations. But after several recent attacks we discovered the raccoons were "cyborg" possums.



posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 05:55 PM
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It was said before in this thread and I'll say it again, shotgun. Plain and simple.



posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 06:01 PM
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Originally posted by Puma
It was said before in this thread and I'll say it again, shotgun. Plain and simple.


Actually I am trying to obtain the austrailian "metal storm" gun that shoots 1,000,000 round a minute. These possums are tough.....



posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 06:27 PM
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Be careful, after further interrogation, it is learned that there is a concerted effort to get Kangaroos, also a marsupial, to join in the fight. With the ever growing threat of suicide possums, who store explosives in their pouches, the thought of suicide Kangaroos is chilling.
Gotta run, I hear possum chatter in my backyard....



posted on Jan, 20 2005 @ 06:36 PM
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Latest Breaking News

Aparrently, there have been 3 instances of garbage cans being blown up -
"This appears to be a coordinated effort by the Possum infidels." says Rumsfeld.
there is also an unsubstantiated claim that a trash truck is also missing.

More to come........



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 06:42 AM
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Originally posted by superdude
Latest Breaking News

Aparrently, there have been 3 instances of garbage cans being blown up -
"This appears to be a coordinated effort by the Possum infidels." says Rumsfeld.
there is also an unsubstantiated claim that a trash truck is also missing.

More to come........





Oh dear god no, I feel for you poor souls in America!!
Over here in England the Great Rat Rebellion of `94 was put down quickly due to the efforts of the brave council workers.



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 06:50 AM
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Originally posted by Zanzibar

Originally posted by superdude
Latest Breaking News

Aparrently, there have been 3 instances of garbage cans being blown up -
"This appears to be a coordinated effort by the Possum infidels." says Rumsfeld.
there is also an unsubstantiated claim that a trash truck is also missing.

More to come........





Oh dear god no, I feel for you poor souls in America!!
Over here in England the Great Rat Rebellion of `94 was put down quickly due to the efforts of the brave council workers.


We tired the "diplomatic" route but got tricked by those rotten rodents........
Example

www.allacrosstexas.com...

www.fishingreportsusa.com...



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 08:33 AM
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Anybody speculate about a possible Possum/Squirrel alliance yet? I can only ponder the reprecussions....



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 09:08 AM
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Originally posted by skippytjc
Anybody speculate about a possible Possum/Squirrel alliance yet? I can only ponder the reprecussions....


Well as you are aware there is already a Possum/Raccoon alliance to the point of genetic mutations. (ewh!) I can only shudder at the prospect of possum/squirrel "axis of evil" alliances...........



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 09:19 AM
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I can only shudder at the prospect of possum/squirrel "axis of evil" alliances...........


I heard that although the squirrel/possum alliances thus far have been disorganized, there is a power struggle internally amongst the leaders of the 2 tribes. If one individual can become the overall leader of this new axis - it will be grim news indeed.
I'm afraid that progress is moving along swiftly, as there is a noticable decline of walnuts on the ground around my home. This walnut buildup by the squirrell clan can only mean one thing - they have WMC
Walnuts of Mass Consumption. I've also noticed more squirrell activity high in the trees lately - those beady little eyes taking surveillance.....



posted on Jan, 31 2005 @ 09:24 AM
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Originally posted by superdude



I can only shudder at the prospect of possum/squirrel "axis of evil" alliances...........


I heard that although the squirrel/possum alliances thus far have been disorganized, there is a power struggle internally amongst the leaders of the 2 tribes. If one individual can become the overall leader of this new axis - it will be grim news indeed.
I'm afraid that progress is moving along swiftly, as there is a noticable decline of walnuts on the ground around my home. This walnut buildup by the squirrell clan can only mean one thing - they have WMC
Walnuts of Mass Consumption. I've also noticed more squirrell activity high in the trees lately - those beady little eyes taking surveillance.....


Very important issue, the squirrels are teaching the possums to cross the road using the power wires......................No one is safe..............

My petitions to GW to have possums declared a "terrorist organization" have gone unanswered..................



posted on Feb, 1 2005 @ 11:36 AM
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An unconfirmed report states that a new videotape has been released to the news agency Marsupialjazeera. The latest tape shows 3 masked raccoons, and a 4 masked possums holding down a cat. The cat was made to show it's collar.
The masked vermin, who were standing in front of a bulging, green Hefty Lawn and Leaf bag, threatened to tie a tin can to the cats tail if the Bush administration didn't stop all trash removal programs in 24 hours.
Weapons could be seen in the pouches of the possums, while 2 of the raccoons were seen to be holding what appeared to be walnuts.
Rumsfeld said he doubted the authenticity of the tape, however showed concern about the alleged walnuts "This does not bode well. Walnuts are known to be sold on the black market by rogue squirrells" he said to an undisclosed source.



posted on Feb, 9 2005 @ 03:12 PM
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OK, This just in. Brace yourselves people!!!




[edit on 9-2-2005 by skippytjc]



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:13 AM
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Originally posted by skippytjc
OK, This just in. Brace yourselves people!!!




[edit on 9-2-2005 by skippytjc]


So where are they getting there funding for weapons? PETA? ALF?



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:20 AM
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Originally posted by DrHoracid
Last night I had yet another possum come onto my back porch. I got out my 10mm Glock with Black Tallon bullits to blow the "critter" into the arms of the 72 virgins. It took (6) shots two to the head to finish the darn thing off. The velocity was too fast for the "tallons" to expand. The bullit just kept blowing through. Please anyone have a better load or weapon for my future wars?



i suggest a baseball bat.



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:22 AM
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Originally posted by GrOuNd_ZeRo
FlyersFan, the standard infantry support weapon is the M249 SAW, the M60 is only used on vehicles these days which use a M2 type pintle mount, and you are telling me you qualified for a weapon that isn't even widely used anymore? when was this? I assume you were in the US Army and not in the Marines,


I was in the Army from 1981 - 1986. Fort Hood TX, Camp Zama Japan,
then Fort Sam Houston TX. Basic was at Fort Dix NJ where we used the
M60, not to qualify on it, but to familiarize. I don't remember the M249
SAW call letters, but we used the LAW ... it was a long tube that you
opened up and pushed a button. When it launched, it didn't push you
back. You hardly knew it had launched. Unless you were standing
BEHIND the weapon ... man there was a major kickback behind it, but
the person firing didn't feel it. Again ... no qualifying on this .. it was
just familiarization.

I qualified with grenades and with the M16 (barely ... I was a lousy
M16 shot. Good with grenades though).

At the time I had gone sky diving as a civilian and so I tried to go
Airborne while in the Army, but in 1981 they weren't too keen on
us females going Airborne. So, I didn't get to go.

[edit on 2/10/2005 by FlyersFan]



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:24 AM
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Originally posted by DrHoracid

Actually I prefer Claymores. I have shot too many of these things to count. The one from the other night took 2 10mm's to the head. 3 to the chest and 1 to the gut.



shoot is one thing but HITTING it is another...........are you SURE you actually HIT the thing with all those shots????




angie



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:38 AM
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after reading this entire thread and seeing the mass conspiracy going on in the ranks of the opossums,squirrels and racoons and NOW kangaroos!!

good LORD..............if you take the speed of the kangroo PLUS the big pouch and combine the cunning of the racoon, the agility of the squirrel and the immortal opossums...............us humans have absolutely NO CHANCE OF SURVIVAL.............this is the beginning of ARMAGEDDON.

the end is NEAR i tell you...............the end is NEAR..........

all this time i've been worried about alien takeover.............and the TRUTH has been right in front of me...............OMG...........


angie



posted on Feb, 10 2005 @ 07:43 AM
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Originally posted by amb1063

Originally posted by DrHoracid

Actually I prefer Claymores. I have shot too many of these things to count. The one from the other night took 2 10mm's to the head. 3 to the chest and 1 to the gut.



shoot is one thing but HITTING it is another...........are you SURE you actually HIT the thing with all those shots????




angie


OK, tried the baseball bat, too much work........

Yes, I hit the damn thing (Shot expert with Pistol/Rifle) in Marines and practice, practice, practice........

I still think PETA is behind all this..........and ALF has been taking over the bio-labs just for this purpose..........



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