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How to pursue something that is difficult .. and succeed !

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posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 01:43 PM
I am sure everybody has been there at one time or another..

You are pursuing something.. a better career or profession.. a practice.. or an art.

You sit down to do it (and it is a difficult thing to do), whether it is a study, a practice, an art.

Next, one of the following things happen - with exertion in any difficult study, practice or art, etc. comes a feeling of discomfort.

Then during the study or practice, experiencing discomfort you say "ok, its time for a break, lets grab a snack." .. or do something pleasant.. watch some TV.. or lets see whats going on with ATS..

Anything other than pursuing that difficult thing that can vastly improve your life.

Next thing you know.. you are not pursuing that thing anymore.. too uncomfortable, and then you find yourself watching TV or something like that instead.


Speaking for myself for example, I am trying to pursue some things on my spare time like an independent career in software development. My hope is that it can greatly improve my life through some sort of independence. However one of the most difficult things to do is to come home from work and then go to work again, as opposed to relaxing.

But if I keep doing the same thing again, relaxing all the time, I stay in the same situation.. my life does not improve.

On my spare time, I may sit down to study.. then encounter some sort of difficulty or mental discomfort.. and even if I am not sleepy, a great sleepiness will fall upon me.. then ok, I'll have some tea.. then lets see whats on TV.. next thing you know I am dong something else and have avoided my difficult pursuit.


Ok, I know some of you came here thinking that I was going to provide a solution, but alas! I suffer from the same problem.

I am one of those guys looking for a solution.

So maybe some wildly successful, self disciplined people here can help provide some kind of solution.

I am all ears and I am sure many people here can benefit from any wisdom anyone can provide.

How do I get over this problem?

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 01:52 PM
Sounds like the problem might be the TV. I rarely watch TV because it drains my energy. It's good to take a break so you can refocus, but perhaps just have the tea away from the TV or ATS? Turn the TV off so it's not attracting you to pay attention to it.

Right now I better get off ATS or I won't get back to what I was doing! Or should I say planning on doing.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 02:17 PM
Thank you for sharing your challenges with staying focused. I have the same exact problem, and it's so difficult to remain diligent enough to stay on task when your so compelled to do something else.

I don't have a solution either - sometimes I change my working area (like moving my laptop somewhere else where I can stand and work), or sometimes I re-arrange my agenda during the day so that I can get whatever other things I want to do done first, and then set a goal for how much time or how much you will accomplish with your other responsibilities.

I know it's probably not that helpful, but changing my work surroundings and rearranging my agendas has really helped me over the past couple of years (I finished college finally and now study economics and law for fun in the evenings, prepping for grad school eventually). Good luck my friend.

a reply to: nOraKat

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 02:29 PM
I feel your pain. I was in the same place up to a few months ago. I wish I could help, but unfortunately this is one of those things you have to figure out on your own. For me, it was quitting drinking, smoking, and the friends whom I'd had for years that I really had nothing in common with besides drinking and smoking. Dropped all of it. I feel better, my productivity is at an all time high, and my brain actually allows me to relax.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 02:31 PM
a reply to: FamCore

FamCore: "sometimes I change my working area (like moving my laptop somewhere else where I can stand and work)"

Thanks for pointing that out. Sometimes the problem can be a simple as being at home. I remember when I was in school, it was much more difficult to study at home, since there are so many comfortable, pleasant things to get into/do, get sidetracked with. I am not sure working in another room would do anything..

Can you elaborate on your rearranging your agenda?

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 02:37 PM
The first part of your thread described me perfectly! I have a lot of trouble with self control and self discipline. For example I will be so motivated to quit smoking one hour then the next it is like I am a different person and just say F it. It is almost as if I am all talk and than as soon as it gets hard I quit, I really don't like that about myself and really need to work on it. I think the key is to just say no sweat and think about the future benefits, I am a man that thinks only in the present and that is my problem.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 03:24 PM

originally posted by: Shepard64
I think the key is to ... think about the future benefits.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 03:25 PM
What you are trying to accomplish, gets you deeper into the Matrix. It gets a better hold on you for a short period. Freedom is what we want, just walk away from the Matrix and walk into a new NOW.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 03:25 PM
I guess there is no easy way.

You just have to endure the pain!

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 03:32 PM
a reply to: HUMBLEONE

I'm just attached to my warm bed, hot running water, toilet and having something to eat.

But now I'm thinking I need some time off and go somewhere nice.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 04:32 PM
I have a hard time motivating myself to do anything that isn't essential or fun BUT I have an extremely useful character flaw.

I can be motivated by bribery

And, good news, I don't think I am alone in this.

Instead of beating yourself with a big stick for not doing something, I'd suggest promising yourself a reward if you do it. You'll have to be strict or maybe persuade someone else to administer your reward when you have earned it - just be sure not to cheat or cut corners.

Also, it would probably be useful to work or study somewhere away from home. Go to the library to read books, go outside away from the house if you want to paint or sketch, take your guitar to the park if you need to practice.

And short bursts rather than a long slog. I read somewhere that a person's brain can only take in about 20 minute's worth of information efficiently at a time.

I imagine it would be far easier for you to do 20 -30 minutes of an activity with a cup of coffee or a donut to look forward to than dragging yourself kicking and screaming towards hours and hours worth of work?
edit on 22-1-2015 by berenike because: (no reason given)

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 05:07 PM
a reply to: nOraKat

Staying focused on anything that does not have your rapt attention can be a sign of ADD. It can be a big stumbling block in life and why some of us never rise to our potential. There are meds that can help that affliction as well as electronic devices such as small, personal EEG devices--but they are not cheap. The best and cheapest way today is via some of the tCSD (trans-Cranial Stimulation Devices. I've had and have even made some over the years. A current one I use is called a "" tCSD device. But you can easily build your own with little knowledge of electronics as they are an extremely simple circuit to build. The internet and Youtube have bunches of devices for sale, designs for building your own and vids.

The devices have been getting a lot of attention the last few years as they originally got attention when articles came out in the public press about how such devices were used to train B-2 pilots to maintain their focus and attention on long flights. Science is jumping onto this bandwagon with both feet as it is the future for a way to rapidly improve learning and memory.

Check them out!

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 10:46 PM
a reply to: Aliensun

That's interesting I'll look into it..

Not sure I have ADD though since I don't seem to have a problem focusing on things I enjoy.

posted on Jan, 22 2015 @ 11:38 PM
a reply to: nOraKat I have the same problem regularly! How I motivate myself is to set a time limit on what I am doing. After a few days the projects seem to take off on their own. I think I am compulsive about finishing things I start, I like to make quilts but the details can get tedious. A time limit really does help. Looking at pictures of finished projects or rewards help also.

posted on Jan, 23 2015 @ 01:59 AM
a reply to: lost in space

Thanks for the reply

Did you mean work a little bit at a time? Like 30 min then take a break..

posted on Jan, 23 2015 @ 08:35 AM
you should have used a question mark rather then an exclamation mark in your thread title, you are not posting an exclamation, you are posting a question, so as you yourself perceived the thread title is indeed misleading, this will lower your chances of getting the replies you seek.

i would say set short term goals, as in if you find yourself getting up to go get some tea stop and think out your next steps, your goals for the next hour or two.

decide how long you will spend having tea and taking a break BEFORE you start the break, and stick to it.

maybe it would help you to set up a reward system, ie if you accomplish (goal) tonight you will treat yourself to (treat) idk ice cream or something whatever works for you.

posted on Jan, 23 2015 @ 10:58 AM
I like to learn new skills, and really love the process. I think that is why I like training animals too, it is the same process.
I really feel like the first levels of learning are exactly like training an animal- I consider it training my body.
Whether it be specific movements or mental connections, I have certain methods I use for myself to keep myself motivated.

In your particular focus of study right now, I cannot give you any specific advice.

But basic rules for me go like this-

Break things down in steps, so as not to flood yourself with too much at one time. But use some repetition at each stage.
Add just a little more each time. That has to be the big rule- if I did twenty minutes one day, then I have to do that much or more the next. If I am very sluggish, that can be just one minute more. If I feel capable, it can be an hour more.
But as long as I did the same amount or more each time, I let myself off the hook.

Always end on a good note!
When you have done something well, or gotten over some obstacle that has been difficult for a while, stop there at that good feeling of accomplishment. Don't go further, tackling new stuff that will leave you feeling a bit frustrated or discontent.
The feeling you have when you walk away is what will linger in association (in your mind) with that activity. Make sure you walk away with a good feeling. That way, you will feel more motivated to pick it up again tomorrow!

If you feel too distracted in a certain environment, take it elsewhere.
My son is in university, with heavy work in physics and math, and he has found he cannot study when he comes home. We live in a peaceful nature environment, rather isolated.. but it is the place he grew up, where he has all his guitars and amps, and memories of sitting around playing while mom brings him a sandwich. (-I don't bring him a sandwich anymore, but the habits remain here! This trained him to want to go home, but not to study there...)

Find an alternate place to do this.
Have some context where you speak about this with others who are in a similar process!!! See if you can debate some of what you are learning (because newbs are always very opinionated). That stimulates thought and interest sometimes.

My most recent thing is learning italian. I use these sorts of ideas. I apply them in both physical disciplines (horseback riding, running, yoga) and in more mental ones (learning languages, learning sciences, learning philosophies), and it works well for me.

But not everyone is the same, so maybe it isn't right for you. Just throwing it out there anyway! Good luck!
edit on 23-1-2015 by Bluesma because: (no reason given)

posted on Jan, 23 2015 @ 11:32 AM
Thanks everyone for the great replies.

posted on Jan, 23 2015 @ 03:04 PM
Oh man, people think I'm a freak because of how I manage my time lol ~ I am big into bodybuilding and recreationally studying economics, history, philosophy, and law. These two interests themselves are like part-time jobs, and I work a typical office job 50-80 hours a week (depending on the work volume at the time). To balance all of this out, I had to find a way to fit in all of these essential activities without sacrificing my health or giving up too much sleep.

I can't change my work hours - those are set in stone. So what I can control is my sleep, workout, and study schedule. The amount of time I need to spend on sleep is between 4 and 7 hours a night, and the amount of time I need for my lifting and food prep. is 2-3 hours a day. Studying is at my own pace so I fit that in around my workouts and sleep. Basically, I take care of my work during the normal hours that I'm supposed to, study during my lunch break some days when I feel I need to get more reading/review in, and then I make damn well sure I get to the gym right after work for a 2 hour workout. The rest of the evening I can either A) go to bed early to fit in my sleep, or B) study for awhile and then sleep.

I know this may seem like jargon but I'm probably just no articulate. I would say you should number your priorities in order of importance, analyze which priorities require you to stick to a certain timeline and which do not, and then commit to some sort of schedule to take care of the top priorities first - with whatever time is left over being "flex time" to fit in lower-priority actions.

That is the best way I could describe it - sorry if it isn't too helpful

a reply to: nOraKat

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