The Revenge of Patriarchy
But what exactly is it, experience-wise, are we talking about? First, lets take a look at what success means in this culture. Most people ay not know
this, but this society we live - its structure as economic practice, which forces certain cultural practices - is thoroughly patriarchal.
What do I mean by this? First, there are two basic 'cultures' within humanity. The emotions which arise naturally and spontaneously within women, and
those which arise within men. The difference, it seems, appears to be testosterone, which behaviorally speaking, means competitiveness and aggression.
Both men and women produce testosterone, and women with high levels of testosterone in their blood also report being more aggressive; but obviously,
testes produce testosterone, so men have much more of it.
In an unenlightened world, the default state appears to be patriarchal, because men, being the physically larger and behaviorally more aggressive sex
will force the 'system' or culture to assume a 'male dominant' inclination. It is inevitable; but there are instances of societies in small band
hunter-gatherer groups as well as particular isolated cultures of values that we would call 'feminine'. It pains me, at some level, to even make
'distinctions' like this, but compassion, in as much as it is a fundamental need of human caregiving, has made the experience of empathy more easily
available to women, because women are the actual ones forced by experience to grow and give birth to a child, which they then need to love and support
if that childs to survive. All of this is the result of unconscious patterning over hundreds of thousands of years, but suffice it to say that its
pretty much a part of the mammalian experience.
Men, all of us - and I'm a man - have this stubborn need, this ever-present background emotion, to prove ourselves, against one another, and in our
relationships with the other sex. Dress, smell, hair, face - we tend to ourselves as a product to be sold and offered to others, mostly the other sex.
When we play sports, were acutely needing to outperform the other guy; needing to justify ourselves, to ourselves as well as others, that were strong
Of course, this is true of females too, but its even more true of males, as the hormone testosterone makes these experiences that much more
compulsive; that much more ‘centralized’, as it were, in the masculine psychology.
But, like the narrative in Genesis where man is treated as the project to be worked on and woman the helper, I too believe that human life on earth
could be redressed as a challenge for men to escape the ‘illness’ of their inclinations. Yes, “illness”. Let me explain: in the animal
kingdom, an organism that lives in an unpredictable environment reproduces sexually, as opposed to asexually, and thus produces male and female
subtypes. If you think about this concept ontologically, you can say “male” exists in turbulent periods where organisms need to move to very
different environments. Conversely, homeostasis or harmony, exists when stability is found; when its found, the organism switches to asexual
reproduction (this is over many years of course; although some organisms actually reproduce like this; switching from asexual to sexual plants).
Many people nowadays talk of a need to focus upon and develop traits we generally identify with women, such as empathy and compassion. Why is that?
Logically, were doing this because we reflect upon this current worlds organization, and we see competition, and all the iterations it creates in
producing distinctions in status, class, and reifying differences by enculturating stereotypes about other people. Competition never lets us drop our
guard. Its modus operandi is ‘suppress’ until it becomes unconscious (dissociated). For example, if someone were to insult me in a subtle way, I
may hold a grudge against them, and so, in acting this way, I do not reflect upon why I even assumed this position. Why am I holding a grudge, I can
ask myself. And I may discover that he may be doing that, giving off these harsh impressions, because he needs to confirm for himself that he is
‘this type of person’; affective needs, our subtle background emotions, give shape to the cognitions we entertain. They are a hidden screen that
orients our attentions to the world.
In a patriarchal world, emotions are denied and narratives are brought very strongly into the forefront. While a different perspective, a different
viewpoint, coming from a different experience they might have had (with their mother for example) is treated as if it were completely irrelevant. When
situations come upon us, how often do we reflect upon how our orientation to the world – our actual conscious experience, our thoughts, etc – is
structured by past relations we have had in that particular environment? Also, there are other factors, such as diet, nutrition, physical activity,
all of which have subtle effects on perception. But the granddaddy of unconscious influences is our past experiences with other people. This is the
strongest force, as it, ultimately, represents what we call our ‘self’, our ‘personality’; it is how we feel to ourselves; our way of
speaking, our way of acting, our way of treating other people, and by implication, ourselves.
A patriarchal society is therefore also a narcissistic society. To make things clearer, I do not mean to trash males; I personally think beyond gender
as I think what’s ‘behind’ each of us is fundamentally beyond duality; so why get caught up in gender differences? Nevertheless, a self aware
decision is not the default one; just cause it can be discerned with a conscious act of wisdom, doesn’t mean living out and developing meaning in
unconscious enactments of past evolutionary behaviors – crystallized socially as our customs – wont rule the day. So long as that ‘inner
witness’ mentioned before doesn’t take over and control the electromagnetic fields of its thoughts over the processes of its physical biology.
Shame is a basic part of the human experience; inevitably resulting from our vulnerabilities, the very first one being the vulnerability of being a
naked and needy infant with an oversized head and a immobile body. The infant cries – we all cried – and so treats itself to a neurologically
coded experience of vulnerability. Vulnerability, psychologically, is designed to be ‘dissociated’, because the unconscious result of reflecting
upon it is to feel bad; and feeling bad, insomuch as it results from a process which builds your sense of self (socializing), the mind over time, at
least in the hominid lines, has done much to structure human attention in a way that experiences which arouse shame or inferiority (anything deemed
‘weak’) will arouse a suppression, leading to a refocusing upon the thing which maintains ‘good feelings’. The thoughts which accompany this
are no more than riding the wave of social dynamics. That each of us is ‘structured’ this way implies a deep psychological interdependence in how
each of us feels, and thus, thinks and behaves, with the other.
edit on 12-1-2015 by Astrocyte because: (no reason given)