There's being a critical mind, a skeptic, a searcher of truth (which many people are without labeling themselves conspiracy theorists), and then
there's delving into the CT world.
The CT world is a mess, because it's where everyone who is seen as "not serious enough" for mainstream skeptics will gather. You have people genuinely
trying to make sense of extraordinary experiences (mystical experience, alien abduction, UFO sighting), people who are interested in these subjects
but never experienced it themselves, people who have issues with the current hierarchies and power structures, religious fundamentalists who see
everything they don't understand as demonic, etc, etc, etc...
I've frequented this crowd for more than 15 years now. It started as curiosity because I was a hardcore scientist but wanted to see the other side of
the coin, to see if everything paranormal is really evading any attempt at being repeated and proven. I started to frequent CT boards and read about
paranormal subjects. A lot.
I learned much, but it also lead me to dark places. It made me have a psychotic break, to experience schizophrenia and paranoia. It made me realize
that a lot of other CT/paranormal searchers also experience this. Many actually being currently undiagnosed or unmedicated paranoid or schizophrenics.
It made me discover that the boundaries between paranormal experiences like mystical experiences/alien abductions/spiritual emergency, and psychosis
are very thin, even non-existing. The main difference being how you approach and integrate your experience, and how you learn from it.
I like this site because it allows me to read some great insights from great minds.
I also hate this site because it's an echo chamber for all the paranoids and the schizophrenics (or just the hateful) to spew their madness and being
comforted to see that they aren't the only ones to think like that; so it's not possible they could be crazy or just plain wrong.
I'm glad I explored these strange shores of the paranormal and hidden world because it made me discover a new strength and a new faith within. It
probably wasn't necessary to go that deep for that but it's my story.
I also regret I spent so much time isolating from the world, like a hermit, because I wouldn't trust it nor my brothers as much as before. It made me
more bitter and cynical. I'm not sure I took the safest nor the best way to become who I am today, and I'm damn sure it made me miss a lot of joy and
time with my friends.
I wish there was a big flashing sign atop ATS banner:
"Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate"
Abandon all hope, ye who enter here
The way the conspiracy world is depicted here is too romantic, too out of line with the reality of the people frequenting it. I know the motto is deny
ignorance, and yet it's probably one of the worst place on the net to actually learn about truths, because the hidden gems of truth you can find here
are lost in seas of BS.
I'm not saying it's all bad, I'm not saying I hate this place (I'm still here), I just wish when I was younger and started my quest for truth on
places like here, older and more experienced people warned me and told me "nothing is like it seems here, don't trust anything you read, make up your
own mind. Always verify any information by yourself, don't be lazy and think a link to another site is a valid crosschecking. Never forget these
places are full of crazy people and they are certain that what they believe is actually objectively real, and not simply a subjective belief or a
I know it sounds condescending and all, but seriously, the mental health and critical mind are too precious to be wasted just because we want so hard
for the world to be magical; just because reality seems too boring to us. Reality isn't boring at all for those who take the time to find the real
magic in it.
Welcome to ATS
because when you see the world through the eyes of a conspiracy theorists, there is no more room for hope.
If you are looking for beauty, go out in the world.
If you are looking for thrill, come in.
But if you are looking for truth, leave this place and search inside yourself.
edit on 9-1-2015 by JUhrman because: (no reason given)