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originally posted by: grandmakdw
As a retired Prof of PSY
I can tell you definitively that some of the posters are correct
no one can push your button but you
no one can "make you offended" but you
if one lacks self control, one is easily offended
if one lacks a strong belief/conviction in one's religion, ideas, convictions, etc., one is easily offended
if one knows what they believe and believe it fully, one can not be easily "offended"
In all of the instances of ugly slurs, etc.
a person who has self control and is firm in what they believe
may take issue with what is said
may argue rationally about what is said
may say what is said is not true
however, offense is an emotion
and those who can not control their emotions
and are weak in their convictions
are easily offended
Those who have control over their emotions
and are firm in their convictions
may disagree
but will not be "offended"
Being easily offended, is the sign of a weak personality
an underlying and unconscious questioning of ones beliefs
and a need to control others and
make others believe as you do, to bolster your own weak convictions
and validate your own beliefs
One can challenge "ugly" slurs
and show how and why the ideas presented by the slur
are incorrect and the belief flawed
without taking "offense"
It is people who do this that totally infuriate the easily offended
because they need others to be offended
to validate their own weak beliefs.
originally posted by: ausername
originally posted by: Jamie1
originally posted by: ausername
Depends entirely on the individual, and their programming. For some people being offended is not a personal choice, it is a mandatory collective (group) response.
The only choice is for people who have been personally offended. In that case, you can choose to be, or not.
When your collective group, culture, religion, etc has been offended whether you are or not, is not a matter of choice.
How people react to being offended is also similarly dynamic.
How does the group determine whether they're supposed to be offended or not? Isn't that a collective group choice based on what the group chooses to believe?
It's not rocket science... For example, if you are gay, and I go into a long rant about how repulsive homosexuals are, how they are condemned to hell...etc etc, at some point, you will be offended... It is similar for any large social groups of people.
Question: Is Being Offended A Personal Choice?
Do you believe being offended is a personal choice based on what you choose to believe?
But maybe that's just me ...
Do you believe being offended is a personal choice based on what you choose to believe?
And if so, what justification is there for wanting people change their behaviors so that you don't upset yourself with your own beliefs?
But you yourself said people react differently to different situations and stimuli, due to their brain composition and chemistry. As I said in a previous post, a person can INTEND to cause a certain emotional reaction in person, but they cannot FORCE the reaction on a person. Your offense, and subsequent reaction to it are internal process based on external stimuli. But as you said, the internal processes differ, so different people respond differently to the very same stimuli. If it were indeed possible to force an emotional reaction in someone, politicians long ago would have cracked the specific combination of words, facial expressions, and body language to make EVERYONE love them. But that's simply not possible, each reaction is a result of an internal process, and no external force can dictate what that response will be.
originally posted by: CharlieSpeirs
a reply to: ScientificRailgun
No I don't.
Otherwise happiness or laughter or sadness or anger are all choices...
These are all common reactions to being offended & can differ depending on the person.
An internal reaction to an external cause...
That's quite simple.
So how does that equate to it being an internal choice?
originally posted by: CharlieSpeirs
a reply to: ScientificRailgun
No I don't.
Otherwise happiness or laughter or sadness or anger are all choices...
These are all common reactions to being offended & can differ depending on the person.
How does that equate to it being an internal choice?
originally posted by: ScientificRailgun
Merriam-Webster are subject matter experts in the field of psychology now?
originally posted by: CharlieSpeirs
Also one must only look at the definition of offensive...
It means causing someone to feel resentful, upset, or annoyed.
Causing!!!
In the sense that it's not a choice.
The pseudo-psychologists have come along to tell us we can choose how the chemicals in our brain react to stimuli...
How surprising.
originally posted by: CharlieSpeirs
No...
If I make an intentionally offensive statement about Cancer or Rape how can a person choose which emotional response that will invoke?
That's like saying you can choose to find something funny, or upsetting...
Or you can choose what angers you...
If it's a meaningless statement of course it can be a choice...
But your generalisations on the "taking offence" hypothesis I have explained are flawed numerous times.
Then that brings into light a deeper philosophical question that I have asked myself before. Are we slaves to our brains? Do we truly have free will, or are all of our actions simply result of a brain we cannot control responding to external stimuli via a process of learned behaviour, past experiences, and brain chemistry?
originally posted by: CharlieSpeirs
a reply to: ScientificRailgun
I don't understand how that makes it a choice.
As intellectual as it was, I fail to see the choice of it's a chemical reaction!
Honestly people, look at Dianetics, worldwide it's known as Pseudo-Psychology...
& it's almost identical to this premise that being offended is always a choice.