Hello, this is my first rant and wanted to keep it personal. I thank anybody who takes the time to read it as this may sound boring to some. It will
make sense towards the end. Please understand, I am aware that there is much more important things in life to be upset about so don't give me the
spiel. I am being overdramatic on purpose.
Anyways, I would like to share something that happened to me last night. A peaceful evening at home quickly turned into a nightmare in half a second.
Three objects that have nothing to do with each other came together to wreak havoc on a tired man yearning for his bed. A manifested trifecta of evil
working as one to ensure the most calm, level headed person completely loses it. Frustration on another level.
Yesterday evening was a disaster of nerd like proportions. To explain a little, I'm a quality over quantity type of guy and the few electronics that
I have are nothing short of badass. It took a lot of hard work and dedication to save my money for what I own, but the payoff was sweet. They have
more value to me and I take care of them very well. Spending the extra buck will also future proof you for a much longer period of time given the
ability to upgrade. The object being discussed in this rant is the computer I use on a daily basis. Its over a year old but looks and runs like I just
took it out of the box. Not a crumb or smudge to be found. I am a compulsive cleaner which helps keep my belongings very clean at the expense of my
The same could also be said for the beer I drink. Instead of your average thirty pack of Coors or Busch lining the bottom of my fridge, there are two
64oz growlers filled with sweet nectar from New England Brewing Co. In this regard I am spoiled. World class beer in my own backyard. Life is good.
Drink less but treat yourself to the finer things in life when you do. You will find the act of drinking more rewarding in itself and less of a
It all started when I began to unwind for the night. Dinner was done and cleaned up. The girlfriend got her phone time. There wasn't much left to do
except feel the reward of my hard work with a nice imperial IPA. I fired up my top of the line Toshiba scream machine and told my brain to go home for
the day. As the aroma of fresh hops and grapefruit began to tickle my senses, I knew the rest of the night was a sure thing.
The last part of the equation can be attributed to my cat Willow. Sorry, no pictures unless someone asks. He basically has his own room and sits like
a spoiled king at the top of his eighty inch tower. I'm 6'5" and he loves the fact he can still look down on me. He ventures around the house when I'm
home but I keep the door shut while out to protect the furniture. Anyone who lives with a cat knows the struggle of dealing with pet hair, but my
situation is pretty much under control. He was sleeping in the other room during the entire event so it was hard to get mad at him. But boy did he
have a hand in all of this.
While sitting at my kitchen table I left the beer underneath my nose for a minute in the space between me and my laptop. I logged into ATS and putzed
around for a little, absorbing the latest doom before being whisked off to bed. I began to take interest in a particular thread which drew the focus
off of my surroundings. What a big time mistake that was. I mistake of nerd like proportions. As I got up, I nudged my beer glass and in one tenth of
a second, went into panic mode. I thought I could save it with my cat like reflexes but instead came around with the left hand of god, causing the
glass to flip up off the table in a of flash of panic. The entire glass drained its contents into my keyboard fell off the table and shattered on the
I took one breath while my brain registered what I had done. I screamed hysterically, you #$%! idiot!!! Son of a bitch!!!, more times than I can
remember. Growling like some mother bear trying to defend it's cub, I immediately yanked the power cord out from the side of the computer and in less
than two seconds was able to shut her down. I ripped the shirt off my body that I was wearing and threw it over my keyboard with the hope of reducing
or I may have done. Obscenities continued to fly out of my mouth as I ran through the house looking for my microfiber rags and cleaning supplies. I
almost forgot about the puddle of glass and beer on my floor and was having a hard time deciding what to clean up first.
Upon reentering the kitchen, I stopped and looked at the mess. My fists were clenched as I continued to insult myself in every conceivable way. I
began to laugh maniacally and walked over to my fridge. Next in the clip was a bomber of Sierra Nevada's Organic Estate Ale. I picked it up and began
shouting at it like I was shaking it down for its lunch money. I walked into every room in the place wanting to punch something I was so upset. I must
have threatened three different walls and tossed around enough pillows to make me feel like a tough guy, lol. In my mind, I was actually surprised
about how upset I got. After cleaning up the floor, I bleached the area. The smell of bleach actually made me feel better, strange.
After finally calming down, I realized what lie ahead of me. A complete teardown and rebuilding of my laptop. All components removed, cleaned and
reassembled in perfect working order. This would have been fine if it wasn't already midnight. I was tired from work, tired from cleaning and if not
for the nerd rage, I would have never made it to the end. See, putting a space heater or blow dryer on it would just leave a sticky mess behind.
Sticky keys and components was not an option. I threw a towel over the table, grabbed my mini screwdriver kit, dentist tools, and of course the last
remaining beer in the fridge. I laughed when taking a sip because I set the beer down in the other room like it was radioactive or something. No more
edit on 3-1-2015 by eisegesis because: (no reason given)