Marriage vows are Un-Bibilical - need new vows, I'm getting married Thursday + Vow Conspiracy

As a Christian I was shocked to discover that Marriage Vows between a man and a woman are Un-biblical.

Yep, that's right - No where in the Bible, Old testament or New did there ever be a marriage preformed with vows and no marriage was ever preformed by a priest or religious figure.

Sure they take our tradition vows from the Old testament, but they were never meant to be used by rote - they were only for an example, not actual vows that you say to each other - those Hebrews never said marriage vows, nor did they in the New Testament.

In fact, the bible goes to great lengths to speak of marriage as being a matter of Local Government Law, not a religious event.

Getting married "In the eyes of God" is also no where to be found the the Bible.

This concerns me because this means all we have been taught all our lives about Christian Marriage is a LIE.

The real way God set up marriage was SEX. (this going back to Genesis) Period. This for the purpose of procreation. The man and woman would be betrothed for a year (dating and getting to know each other) then they were simply considered married after a "wedding dinner party" ( a wedding feast at someones house) of course then the man and woman consummated the marriage when all the house quests left. - And that was it - that's the whole Biblical marriage.

The vows as used today are in fact legally binding through the law. If your vow says the wife must obey the husband, did you know if the wife fails to obey the husband you can take your spouse to court for it - and you'll win too because those vows are a legally binding verbal contract preformed in front of a judge and witnesses including signed papers. We don't want vows like that.


Protestants, Listen Up - If the God fearing folks of the Old and New Testaments did not use marriage vows, where did it come from?

The Catholic Church !

But I want to back up a bit and ask the VERY NEEDED QUESTION: WHO CAME UP WITH THE PRACTICE OF WEDDING CEREMONIES????

According to Wikipedia, 'In the time of the Roman Empire (17 B.C.- A.D. 476) the lower classes (proletarians) had "free" marriages. The bride's father would deliver her to the groom, and the two agreed that they were wed, and would keep the vow of marriage by mutual consent. Wealthy Romans, though, would sign documents listing property rights to publicly declare that their union was legalized and not a common law marriage. This was the beginning of the official recording of marriage.

The oldest traditional wedding vows can be traced back to the manuals of the medieval church. In England, there were manuals of the dioceses of Salisbury (Sarum) and York. The compilers of the first Book of Common Prayer, published in 1549 based its marriage service mainly on the Sarum manual. Upon agreement to marry, the Church of England usually offered couples a choice. The couple could promise each other to "love and cherish" or alternatively, the groom promises to "love, cherish and worship", while the bride to "love, cherish and obey." [en.wikipedia.org...]

Now I find this very interesting. That the very institution that - as far as I'm concerned - polluted the Church that GOD built - THE ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH - started this practice.

detoxedfromchurchanity4real.blogspot.com...

So you see the Local Roman Government at the time used religious marriage to make things legally binding they never used before - such as the land money and goods the husband and wife shared. They saw this as a way to CONTROL the masses and the things that belonged to the people.

You Protestants should really be ashamed of yourselves for falling into a Roman Catholic Trap. - But I don't blame you, I blame the Reformation (I'm Protestant myself) - In the Protestants zeal to be rid of the false catholic church, they overlooked the things which the catholic church simply made up and didn't make a clear distinction on what was actually in the bible - they ignorantly lumped all data together with no thought for it's correctness.

Learning all of this was distressing so to the point I want to have no truck with any un-biblical traditional marriage. ( the above is not my only source, there are many examples that prove my point.)

Yes, you Can find passages in the Bible to back up someone say a man for instance making a wedding vow to a woman but these are all taken out of context - no vows were ever exchanged in the bible during the wedding ceremony.

Mind you I am not against getting married in the eyes of God, in fact the woman and I have been living together for over 10 years and we have consummated the relationship many times - in the eyes of God who see's everything - so there is no real point to " getting married in the eyes of God" during a silly ceremony.

This is very important -> I believe they did not use vows in the bible because it will be Against God's Will - God in the bible tells us not to swear any oaths ever - and if you look up the word vow as used in the bible it means to swear an oath - They knew what they were doing, it's just everyone since that got it all wrong.

Now you have heard the arguments and seen the data, I need new vows. We'll be using a Justice of the Peace because a legal marriage is what is required, not a religious marriage.

Any ideas? Your thoughts on the matter?

Simply turn to her and or the Group of friends, family and loved ones and tell it like it is from the heart as to why you love and desire the special gal in your life.

Why is it your heart goes thump thump when you two are apart too long. Why she makes you smile, laugh while gently & lovingly filling that spot in your life so warmly.

Tell them how you plan on spending whatever time you have left together doing the stuff you two enjoying doing together.

Speak from the heart.




Congrats

I was going to write you a

EULOGY

Write your own. Many couples have, and are doing just that. The judge will hear them, along with a witness, and will pronounce you man and wife. Done.

Vows....?

But from my experience, an iron clad pre-nuptial agreement, filed and recorded is a recommended safeguard for when the vows head south.

Congratulations!!

a reply to: JohnPhoenix

you conveniently ignore the fact that biblical marriage is a pact between the groom and the brides father or more frequently worse - an act of kidnap

vows are unessecary when the " union " is not concesual

simply made up and didn't make a clear distinction on what was actually in the bible

That`s a pretty accurate summarization of religion.

write your own vows, the judge doesn`t care what you say, to him a marriage ceremony is just a legal procedure.

The only 2 words that the judge needs to hear are "I do"

And the Catholic Church "borrowed" the idea of a marriage license, because they could charge for it.

Sneaky Devils.

Say positive things and have a great party with family and friends.

when my wife and i got married we told the lady that performed he service that we did not want anything religious at all.
also, none of that do you promise to obey #.

we didnt write our own but we proofed the pre written piece she had for us.
i dont remember it all

but instead of do you promise to love, honor, and obey it was will you always love and respect

they were nice vows

originally posted by: JohnPhoenix

Now you have heard the arguments and seen the data, I need new vows. We'll be using a Justice of the Peace because a legal marriage is what is required, not a religious marriage.

Any ideas? Your thoughts on the matter?

If you go to a Justice of the peace THESE DAYS the main spiel will include, 'promises to each other' and, 'Please put your mobiles in vibrating mode' it's all legal. That's what he/she's there for.
Anyway you can live together as partners these days and bonk your brains out..have you not noticed? The legalities you can still enjoy. The legalities care not about any religion for the plebs. The stuff and nonsense remains in constitutions.

originally posted by: Grovit
when my wife and i got married we told the lady that performed he service that we did not want anything religious at all.
also, none of that do you promise to obey #.

we didnt write our own but we proofed the pre written piece she had for us.
i dont remember it all

but instead of do you promise to love, honor, and obey it was will you always love and respect

they were nice vows

The 'obey' shinola has gone long ago.

If you don't want to take wedding vows, don't. To the J.P. (if that is your chosen mode), you could say "I promise to try not to fart in bed". It really doesn't matter.

At this point in our society, wedding vows are pretty much lip service to tradition.

Just marry the girl, already.

A good pre-nup and a promise to be considerate and faithful would cover most things, I think.

People under-value consideration imo

Hmmmm, what else ? ..... best think twice before making any rash promises to always tell the truth

a reply to: JohnPhoenix

I'm just curious, are there other un-biblical things which concern you, or do you see fit to just cherry pick the 'word of god'?

For instance, do you wear clothing made of two different fabrics?

My parents got married when they were 21 (they have been together since they were teenagers) and just recently celebrated almost forty years together with 33 of them as a married couple, I've seen their wedding video and I know the vows that they took were not the typical ones. I tried to get the video to clip it and share it on here but was told Nope. So here they are -

My Dad - I swear on my heart and the punishment of death to stand beside you through it all. The good times, the bad times and the great times. I swear to love you no matter what happens, whether you become very old and grey with crows feet or if you suddenly win the lottery jackpot and become a millionaire. I swear to love you more than any man can love a woman as long as you keep to your promise of a full English breakfast every morning and a home cooked meal every sunday. (There was laughter at this point so I didn't get the last promise)

Mum - I swear to you from the bottom of my heart, that if you repeat those vows I will show you why I have this bump on my forehead (Mum was a bit of a punk when she was younger and liked to fight). I promise to love you no matter how fat you get and how bald you get and even when you get old and start to smell of pee and soil yourself. I promise to love you to the moment of your death and then if no one else comes along well I guess I'll love you then. (Again laughter)

These are all real, My parents are what you would call king and queen of British humour and still to this day they mock each other. Recently Mum managed to lock herself in the bathroom and after banging on the door for five minutes Dad let her out, she looked at him and said 'You were out here the whole time, weren't you?' Dad's answer was through belly shaking laughter 'Yes and it was very funny'. (I've replaced the curse word with the word 'Very').

a reply to: Danny85

Quite possibly the greatest marriage vows I've ever heard of.

originally posted by: JohnPhoenix
As a Christian I was shocked to discover that Marriage Vows between a man and a woman are Un-biblical.

Guess what - cars, planes, electricity, phones, microwaves, tv's etc. etc. are all "un-biblical", so you really are stuffed - or don't you worry about them as you want to use them?

a reply to: ProfessorChaos

Just showed your reply to my parents and they both laughed and said to say that 'you must be the smartest person on the interweb thing'

a reply to: Danny85

Definitely not the smartest. I managed to get married three times.

a reply to: ProfessorChaos

Is it bad that I just laughed at that? I mean the three marriages and I'm assuming two divorces. Maybe you were smart enough to get out lol

a reply to: Danny85

Yeah, smart enough to get out, and dumb enough find another.
I'm always on the lookout for the future former Mrs. Me.