The Santa Tradition: Yes or No?

Our daughter never believed in Santa and she'd always get terrified when she'd see Santa in the mall so we skipped the whole thing. She knew that families gave each other gifts at Christmas to celebrate Jesus approximate birthday. She is adopted and the day we celebrate her birthday is approximate so it was kinda nice for her that Jesus birthday was approximate as well.

I've seen parents forcing their crying terrified children to sit on the lap of Santa in the mall. I thought it was horrid. If a child WANTS the Santa thing, then fine. But pushing it on kids is, IMHO, horrid.

Side note - She believed in the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy for a long time.

When my children were young they enjoyed believing there was a Santa Clause, just as I did when I was young. Finding out the truth was a hard blow for them, as it was for me, but I softened the blow by telling the story of the real Santa Clause (St. Nicholas) who lived a long time ago and brought gifts to children, and did many kind and generous deeds. That seemed to go over well.

a reply to: Hoosierdaddy71

If Santa Claus does any serious mental damage to your kids then they are in for a lifetime of misery and antidepressants.

Its not just "santa". Its Santa, the easter bunny, the tooth fairy, Disney, circuses, zoos, church and the news channel all added up that gives them pause for pills.

Its okay though, like you said it just prepares them for "real life". Then BS like "(I)maginary (S)tates will go down much easier.

I was the youngest, and even though I never saw my parents playing Santa/no one told me he was fake I didn't believe in it. I actually felt kind of insulted that my parents thought I was stupid enough to believe some fat guy flies around the world and goes through chimneys, but I appreciate that they tried.
I was 10 when I was sure that Santa wasn't real. Before then I kind of believed for the sake of believing-
after that year Christmas became kind of boring.

It was one of my older brothers who told me that Santa wasn't real when I was a kid. At first I was crushed, then it hit me...My parents created such magic for us all those years through their love. Christmas was and always will be magical and filled with love. It is a very special time for children and I wouldn't take that away from them for a minute.

a reply to: intrptr

LMAO! Only on ATS could ISIS get worked into a thread about Santa and still be on topic.

originally posted by: nonspecific
I understand the whole lying thing from the perspective of a critical thinking adult but does any one really have a problem with there parents creating a happy fantasy full of awe, wonder and magical reindeers for to make them happy as a child?

It's like the tooth fairy, yes it's a lie but it distracts children from the pain and discomfort of teeth falling out which is pretty unpleasant.

I agree. I think the true test is whether adults look back on the time they believed in Santa with pleasant memories or resentment. I think it falls solidly in the pleasant memories camp.

a reply to: kosmicjack

I remember one Christmas Eve when I was pretty little getting out of bed after everyone else was asleep and going downstairs to wait up and see what happens. The tree was all lit up in the dark - glorious and gorgeous fire hazard that it was. I lived in the mountains, in the middle of a pine forest and it had just snowed - and there was a full moon...

I accidentally bumped something under the tree - a music box - and it played a little something for about 4 seconds

I can't even describe how perfect it all was - magical - waiting for Santa. I still remember that night all these years later, even though I now know the truth. It's one of those perfect memories - unspoiled by reality

Don't remember exactly how old I was when I stopped believing - but I was young. I vaguely remember recognizing my dad's handwriting on the thank you note Santa left for the cookies. All it takes is a detail - parents can't think of everything :-)

My dad was an atheist, but he still got into it. Painted rabbit tracks on the floor for Easter. So - maybe this won't make sense coming from a godless heathen - but there's nothing wrong with a little mystery and magic in a kid's life. Even if it's make believe - and maybe especially because it is make believe

You're son was angry - but now he gets it. It's as much about giving that sense of wonder as receiving it. I remember specifically not wanting to ruin things for my younger sisters

I say let him have Santa. If he's still into it by the time he's 10 - maybe have a word. Or, let his brother

a reply to: FlyersFan

Side note - She believed in the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy for a long time.

I had a harder time with the Tooth Fairy as a kid - trading body parts for money with some unseen creature that somehow managed to get under my pillow without waking me up...

Maybe I just over-thunk the whole thing

:-)

I like the concept of the tooth fairy as stated earlier but the truth behind it is more magical and a little sinister.

As far as I understand in magic to own a part of someone is to manipulate them, thats why mothers would keep the teeth, hair and nail clippings of children.

a reply to: Spiramirabilis

originally posted by: Spiramirabilis
a reply to: kosmicjack

I remember one Christmas Eve when I was pretty little getting out of bed after everyone else was asleep and going downstairs to wait up and see what happens. The tree was all lit up in the dark - glorious and gorgeous fire hazard that it was. I lived in the mountains, in the middle of a pine forest and it had just snowed - and there was a full moon...

I accidentally bumped something under the tree - a music box - and it played a little something for about 4 seconds

I can't even describe how perfect it all was - magical - waiting for Santa. I still remember that night all these years later, even though I now know the truth. It's one of those perfect memories - unspoiled by reality

Don't remember exactly how old I was when I stopped believing - but I was young. I vaguely remember recognizing my dad's handwriting on the thank you note Santa left for the cookies. All it takes is a detail - parents can't think of everything :-)

My dad was an atheist, but he still got into it. Painted rabbit tracks on the floor for Easter. So - maybe this won't make sense coming from a godless heathen - but there's nothing wrong with a little mystery and magic in a kid's life. Even if it's make believe - and maybe especially because it is make believe

You're son was angry - but now he gets it. It's as much about giving that sense of wonder as receiving it. I remember specifically not wanting to ruin things for my younger sisters

I say let him have Santa. If he's still into it by the time he's 10 - maybe have a word. Or, let his brother

Well said. I still remember the magic, too. Even when I reached the conclusion that Santa was not real, I did not say anything to my parents for fear of spoiling the magic. It seemed to me that they enjoyed it as much as I did. It's joyful play acting. There's a reason why the tradition has been passed down from generation to generation. I didn't look on it as my parent's lying but, rather, pretending to make me very happy.

a reply to: Spiramirabilis

i write from santa with my left hand. im right handed

i also do the rabbit tracks.
i hold 3 cotton balls in my 3 fingers and dip them in baby powder. then i make a trail from the front door, into my childs rooms, all over their #, and finally to where i put the basket

originally posted by: Grovit
a reply to: Spiramirabilis

i write from santa with my left hand. im right handed

i also do the rabbit tracks.
i hold 3 cotton balls in my 3 fingers and dip them in baby powder. then i make a trail from the front door, into my childs rooms, all over their #, and finally to where i put the basket

That's sweet!

a reply to: Tangerine

I did not say anything to my parents for fear of spoiling the magic. It seemed to me that they enjoyed it as much as I did. It's joyful play acting. There's a reason why the tradition has been passed down from generation to generation.

:-)

Exactly

originally posted by: Tangerine

That's sweet!

i have been compared to a stuffed animal made by grandma

thanks though. i have my moments. just dont tell anyone.
i have an image to keep

a reply to: Grovit

I love that - you are a special kind of devious

:-)

I used to make these little fairly lands for my sisters when I was a kid - involving ant lions and sand and houses woven from flowers

Haven't thought about that for a very long time

a reply to: nonspecific

That made me laugh because there really is something a little creepy - and sinister - about the whole tooth fairy thing

I mean - what would she want with my teeth?!

originally posted by: Spiramirabilis
My dad was an atheist, but he still got into it. Painted rabbit tracks on the floor for Easter. So - maybe this won't make sense coming from a godless heathen - but there's nothing wrong with a little mystery and magic in a kid's life. Even if it's make believe - and maybe especially because it is make believe

Emphasis mine. I pretty much agree on that. People can pitch & believe the wildest, most outrageous & ridiculous religious stories, but brief annual visit from benevolent gift-giver is awful. I can't figure that line of thought out because it makes no sense & is the height of hypocrisy to me. Let the kiddies have a little magic in their life, come on. After all, we're expected to respect that people actually believe religious ideas of people gathering 2 of all animals on a boat, people turning into salt, what is tantamount to a zombie exiting a cave after a few days, etc. Taking that into consideration, explain why the kind fat man is terrible now? If he's a bad idea to do to kids, what about Father Christmas? Sinterklaas? Or is this just the American version that sucks? Obviously, fantasy plays into some people's literal grip on the world for their entire lives (i.e religion) so why not a whimsical winter figure for a few youthful years?

My older kid (7) doesn't really think Santa is real, though she still wonders. My younger kid (5) is all for it. They visited Santa's helper at the mall this year, and had a blast doing so. They even get an annual video message emailed to them from Santa (PNP website fr those interested) They LOVE getting that email, it makes it even more magical for them because he "took" the time to send them one on a first-name basis (the PNP crew actually did an amazing job making a convincing customizable storyline for these)

When they decide to not believe, they decide to not believe. Neither of them thinks the tooth fairy or Easter bunny are real, but they play along anyway for the fun of it. I doubt the revelation of Santa being mom & dad in reality is going to be all that damaging.

originally posted by: Spiramirabilis
a reply to: nonspecific

That made me laugh because there really is something a little creepy - and sinister - about the whole tooth fairy thing

I mean - what would she want with my teeth?!

The line I tried that sort of worked as an off-the-top of my head explanation was that teeth are made of minerals from things we eat & drink, and the tooth fairy is big on putting things we don't use anymore back in to the earth so they can be used by people who need them, like kids growing teeth. The response was pretty much, "Ok...that's thoughtful of her."