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Hello, I'm Matthias. Behold, my story.

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posted on Nov, 22 2014 @ 09:03 AM
The only thing I can say outside of the science department, is that if she experienced paranormal stuff, she may be still "at war with the darkness".

You kinda have to embrace to darkness (forgive it and acknowledge it is also a part of yourself, you're both light and dark), to see the light.
But I don't know how to achieve the unity. It happened by accident with me, well not accident, but I didn't expect it.

However, I don't want to be the bearer of false hope, so.. I actually dare not say anything, but I feel like I want to help so badly.. But I'm powerless.

But miracles happen, now you see, with my story, miracles CAN happen. Let's hope for the best. Strenght.

posted on Nov, 22 2014 @ 09:57 AM

originally posted by: Shana91aus
a reply to: Lux96

That's great and it really does make a whole difference when you have a support network!

Maybe you just need to find something that you really like and stick with that, you draw with music right so maybe you have an artistic flare look at following that passion, its great for our mental health aswell and you can express yourself through it. Its all trial and error you just need too find something that you love and stick too it, there Is no rush either you don't want to take on too much at once.

Wow, that is actually quite an insight for me. I never was really artistic, I always draw the same figures, if I even drawed, drawing music was only a few weeks, but actually it does not sound like a bad idea if like you said I have the motivation for it.

It would come naturally for me and would be "easy". And it would open up my artistic side wich I'm sure is latent.
Hmm, you have sparked something inside of me. Let us hope and work towards that this seed may grow.

I make no promises, but I will do my very best to manifest myself to my best form.

posted on Nov, 22 2014 @ 10:03 AM
Actually, your butterfly... It reminds my of the person I loved/love. She is very very artistic, even has her own website with manadalas and what not...
Thought that case (meaning our relationship) is hopeless, her skills with perhaps latent artistic creativeness could be mixed.. That would be the ideal love story, helpless, lonely boy finds latent creative skills makes up with super creative wondergirl to creat next-gen creative material through means of music.

Then probably make a 3d game about it in one way or another...

Yeah, I can dream, I really can.

Agh, better not to think about this stuff.
edit on 22-11-2014 by Lux96 because: (no reason given)

posted on Nov, 22 2014 @ 09:23 PM
a reply to: Lux96
I have not read the entire thread, to this point... Have only read to/near the end of Page 1... So, if you've already answered or discussed my question/s...please disregard.

Have you seen - "The Nines"?
Writer & Director - John August
Starring - Ryan Reynolds, Hope Davis, Melissa McCarthy, Elle Fanning
Debut - November 30, 2007 (UK)

If you have not - please get back to me, after you have.
If you do not get back with me - I will presume that you have not seen it, yet...and remain silent.

My experience began, August, 2007.
October 30, 2007, I journaled of 99, 9, 69, stating that I had just 'seen' something about "Nines" the day before.

An interesting quote from that journal entry --
"...a nine can be a six...and a six...can be a nine...if given a little push..."
"In the decimal system - '9' is the only one that...when added to itself (9+9)...and reducing its sum...results in...itself..."

Was the turquoise-eyed girl...a 69?

Thanks for your post.
Welcome to ATS!

posted on Nov, 22 2014 @ 10:18 PM

originally posted by: Lux96
Can anybody answer me how to customize my avatar and stuff?

This site is too complex for me, lol

I have not taken advantage of their services...but I the people/members in this thread - BTS: Avatar Creations 2014 do great work...and, I believe they do it on their own time/s, and free of charge.

posted on Nov, 23 2014 @ 12:37 AM
I have not watched the "Nines".

Too be honest with you all, I am a VERY lazy person. I will try to watch it someday.
Anyways, to answer your question, yes that girl with turqoise eyes was a 69, I consider myself to be a 96, I have even bought some kind of blouse for myself just because it has the number 96 on it. When I saw that I just had to get it. It looks like something for a man but on the inside it says 'Miss Romance'.

That makes me think at that one time, I was at a chat and suddenly I get private messaged by someone saying: I am Legion, I do not forgive, I do not forget and he started cussing at me and calling me a woman and that I would have better luck with men.

If you want me to watch the Nines before we can continue our conversation, this may take a while, I'm in a rough transition in my life and I'm not sure when I will be going to be feeling like watching it, I am very interested however.

What you say about a 9 being pushed into a 6... Let's just say, I have this feeling that I am so "pure" or so INTO the Light that if ever something happened that causes me to become bitter and/or insane, I might become something like an anti-christ.

I kinda feel like Ned Flanders sometimes, holding in all my anger, although I don't really do that, I just imagine if people get me so far that I become enraged that they will have to prepare for the worst #storm of all times and also I have a history of medical problems, mental health issues. I am 'scared' that maybe someday I might actually hurt someone physically, tho in every psychotic episode I had, even while thinking some people are evil aliens I have kept my respect for all kinds of lifeforms.

I don't hurt anyone fast, hell, I don't even kill bugs, not even mosquitos (only sometimes mosquitos when they're flying around my head and I can't go to sleep because of that).

I look forward to start a conversation with you but if you insist that I watch the Nines first then this may take a while, my apolagies.
edit on 23-11-2014 by Lux96 because: (no reason given)

posted on Nov, 23 2014 @ 02:25 AM
If it means anything to you, in one of my psychotic episodes I felt as if I had died in a parralel universe.. That's probably a bad thing I guess.

Oh well, I'm an optimist.
Like my mother always said: Quitting is not in our dictionary.

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