the inferno of eternal push-ups

Had the strangest dream last night.

I was in a foxhole with a Sergeant whom was stationed as my direct supervisor. he had warned me that some action I had taken would lead in due time to some horrific version of hell in which I would be forced for all time to do push-ups, without break for rest, under the boot of some as-yet unrealized threat.

I then stood there with this man mourning and in constant-dread of the un-named threat which was within ear-shot and I could hear it slowly approaching. closer and closer approaching the inferno of eternal push-ups.

The good news is that in this reality you can't do pushups forever, everyone has their limits.

The bad news is that hell is not in this reality, so maybe it would feel as if you could barely grind one out perpetually.

Ouch!

On second thought, hell is a state of mind, and your mind was there lastnite. It was your world.

So the question becomes, of what are you nearly conscious of that's rumbling through your psyche right now?

Face it.

I was speaking with my cousin earlier in the day and, in response to a certain line of conversation, that I am being "reckless" in my behavior.

I knew in the moment that she was right, but I laughed it off.

something is very wrong with me.

a reply to: tgidkp

Nice take on the Sisyphus myth (eternally pushing the boulder up the hill, could be a metaphor for life), or the general concept of hell.

One can think, life is automatically good, or contains goodness, because reality is not absolute hell, or the absolute worse form of existence imaginable... at least not for some. Or, the concept of human free will and power, is that humans have the ability to make life good, and better, at least in some instances and to some degrees.
Also that life is not eternal, so it can not be eternal punishment. But if the possibility and existence or even thought of eternal existence, and eternal 'lack of freedom', or eternally forced to do extremely unbearable acts, eternally pushed to the hardest degree with no let up, eternally tortured, supposed the extreme opposite of freedom, the absence of any freedom to the harshest degree of absolute harsh constant increasing torture...yes, that would suck.

a reply to: tgidkp

Yea, if you are looking for some interpretation.

I personally think the subconscious may have evolutionary instincts that can come through in waves of wisdom, that may be at times, or in minor moments, greater, or at least extra, as to what the conscious you can decide for yourself to think and want to do.

I suppose, your dream can be interpreted as your subconscious, body, or even you yourself telling yourself you have been trying to ignore and tell yourself for a while, but finally it has gotten through enough to get your attention, that you are not taking life seriously enough, and you need more discipline, that perhaps there is even a direct relation to the desire to work out more, and work to get stronger, that you fight with yourself the whys and why nots and motivations and anxieties that can go along with such a thing.

a reply to: ImaFungi

the wiki on sysiphus tells us that, "Sisyphus was punished for chronic deceitfulness by being compelled to roll an immense boulder up a hill, only to watch it roll back down, and to repeat this action forever."

there are some hard and sorely needed truths in your reply, ima. the time has come finally (at 36 years of age) for me to decide if I really intend to succeed at my chosen career path. I have been in school now for 6 years and it has been easy to let myself get caught up in the fantasy that I will be a raving success simply because I am an awesome person... or something like that.

anyways, rather than rambling on, I will simply say thank you (and to Mr. cheese) for helping me to sort this out. you've been a good friend to me here on ATS and I hope to return the favor at some point in the future.